CelebNewsWire - The skinny. The scoop. The Hollywood poop. Wherever there is a nipple slip, we'll be there. If there's a party, you'll find us doing shots with Lindsay Lohan and upskirt flashing alongside Britney Spears. Wherever Paris Hilton is breaking the law, you'll see us. If there's a celebrity sex tape, we will find it. Nude stars, drunk stars, scandals, hookups, breakups? Let CelebNewsWire be your guide. Hold our hands. Come inside.

filed under: Sienna Miller

August 12, 2008

Sienna Miller Gets Pap Smeared

sienna_crying_1.jpgDespite rumors that oily heir (not Brandon Davis either) Balthazar Getty has been pleading to get back together with his wife, he continues to see Sienna Miller. See her with her shirt on, for a change, but see her nonetheless. Sienna made a rare solo appearance yesterday at an L.A. area gas station, and was mobbed by paps to the point that she burst into tears. Quite a change from her Jude Law days, when she used to claw their eyes out and call them a see-you-next-Tuesday. The Blemish reports:
She broke down shouting “leaving me alone” as the cameras flashed around her. And when one paparazzo asked about her relationship with Getty, the actress fumed shouting: “I’m just trying to fill up my fucking car! Please, I’m asking you. I can’t live like this, please give me a little bit of respect.”
"Please! I'm porking a married man whose four little babies are asking 'where's Daddy?' because he's out tickling my titties. Please! I demand respect!" more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

August 07, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Supa Dupa Krupa

krupa_naked_maxim.jpgJoanna Krupa gets naked for Maxim. Maxim-um mammage. (The Blemish)

• Mr. Skin asks: who's the hottest dame in a superhero movie? (Mr. Skin)

• Beauty and the Undereye Bags: Catherine Keener is porking Benicio del Toro. (Hollyscoop)

Shia the Beef will not have to have his pinky amputated. So. Uh. Great, we guess. (Celebitchy)

• 46-21-55. Kim Kardashian in a bikini. (Drunken Stepfather)

Kate Moss switched lives with her nanny for a day. Which marks the first time Kate has seen her child since its birth. Awww. (Female First)

Jessica Alba humps a chair like her name was Nomi Malone. (Cityrag)

Jessica Simpson strips for Tony Romo via webcam. Haw, like we're supposed to believe Jessica Simpson knows how to turn a computer on? (peanut gallery: "Well, she sure know how to turn ME on! Ahahahaha!") (Holy Taco)

Sienna Miller's friends maintain that she did not wreck Balthazar Getty's marriage. She just stuck a knife in its already rotting corpse and twisted it around and then cut off its head is all. (CelebWarship)

• Morgan Freeman and his wife split. We blame Sienna Miller. (Daily Stab)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

July 24, 2008

Sienna Miller's Pubes Restored with the Magic of CGI

sienna_miller_hair_extensions_weave.jpg Remember oh so long ago, way before we had seen Sienna Miller's blammos in public here and here and probably a couple of hundred other times that we've since forgotten, remember how Sienna was filming a movie where she was supposed to be some sort of nude hippie love goddess but she insisted on meticulously trimming her vadge hairs in very un-'60s fashion? Remember that? Well, enjoy the manicured pube trail while you can, because it's getting covered up by cartoon cooch fuzz. Our favorite gossip comedian, FemaleFirst, brings us one of the best stories we've heard in weeks:
Sienna Miller had her private parts digitally enhanced for her new movie.

The 26-year-old actress had to have pubic hair added by computer wizard for some scenes in her new film 'Hippie Hippie Shake'.

In the movie, Sienna plays Louise, the girlfriend of publisher Richard Neville, who was heavily involved in London's party scene during the 60s.

A studio source told Britain's Daily Mirror newspaper: "The film is set in the swinging 60s when fashion was wild and body hair even wilder. Unfortunately, Brazilian waxes weren't common in the 60s and Sienna's part involved one or two nude scenes - meaning that her grooming habits were on display. A merkin [pubic wig] simply wouldn't have done the trick, but luckily computer wizardry came to the rescue.

"Sienna's private parts were enhanced, giving her a rather unruly bush. All the cast had a good giggle about it and stoical Sienna happily played along."

A Brazilian is a method of pubic waxing where almost all hair is removed.
Gee thanks, FF, for telling us the precise definition of Brazilian. And here we always thought it had something to do with Gisele Bundchen. Anyway, we've always known that CGI was useful for more than deflating Lindsay Lohan's casabas and de-Kabbalah-fying Ashton Kutcher. And, you know, blowing shit up and making monsters and all that shit the kids love these days. CGI allows lazy actresses to give period-appropriate furburger footage without having to stuff a fluffy muff into their panties every morning. Yay technology! more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

July 14, 2008

Sienna Miller and Balthazar Getty Know How to Keep It on the DL

sienna_miller_naked_balthazar_getty_1.jpg Actor and oil heir Balthazar Getty is, indeed, drilling Sienna Miller and spewing forth gusher after gusher. The very married father of four vehemently denied that he and Miller were a couple previously; however, these pictures were taken over the weekend of them frolicking like a couple of nympho unicorns on a yacht off the Italian coast. But you know what? On second thought, maybe Balthy is telling the truth. After all, what do we have to go on here? A guy, minus his wife, minus his four kids, the youngest of which is eight months old, on a vacation with an actress. Who he's hugging and kissing and feeling up. And who is naked. Mere speculation, friends. All circumstantial. Hogwash, really. After all, that totally wasn't R. Kelly peeing on that little girl.

Sienna boobs and men who love them. After the cut. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 30, 2008

Sienna Miller and the Oil Heir (No, Not Brandon Davis)

sienna miller in black tights as pants.jpg Sienna Miller likes to come at a situation from all angles. She's already played the wronged fiancée who was left brokenhearted after her man was caught sticking his Lincoln Log into his children's nanny's Easy Bake Oven. But now Sienna's thinking, "That was no fun. It's probably better to be the other woman. Maybe I should give it a go." Reports The Mirror:
Sienna Miller is in a messy love triangle with a married millionaire a month after dumping actor Rhys Ifans.

The star has fallen for Balthazar Getty, 33, a member of the super rich oil dynasty.

But he is married with four children, including June Catherine, who is just eight months old.

His furious wife Rosetta Getty is speaking to divorce lawyers today.

It is not yet known if Sienna, 26, will be named in any court papers.

A friend of [Balthazar's Brothers & Sisters costar] Matthew [Rhys]'s said: "They began meeting in Prague and that was when the chemistry started and he began wooing her.

"She had a boyfriend and it didn't immediately turn physical but there was something there.

"This behaviour is typical Sienna. She loves the power of being able to take a man off another woman.

"At least Rhys Ifans can try to get over it now. He knows she lied to him about Prague so that will make it a bit easier for him to move on."

For the past month Sienna and Balthazar, said to be "besotted and smitten", have been getting closer.

The tycoon's wife and children Cassius Paul, Grace, Violet and June Catherine, are all thought to have gone to stay in one of the family's well-staffed villas in Italy while a divorce is thrashed out.

A source confirmed: "Sienna got to know Balthazar through Matthew and they hit it off. They have grown incredibly close. He secretly flew to London and Prague to be with her. She has spent last week in a Hollywood house with him."

The pair have been holed up day and night with each other as their romance blossomed.

Sienna flew to Los Angeles last Monday after finishing her nine-month relationship with Ifans.

On Wednesday Sienna ordered a takeaway and took it back to a hideaway house in Hollywood she was sharing with Balthazar.

They ate out in LA on Thursday and met friends including actor Johnny Lee Miller for drinks on Friday, arriving separately.

A witness said: "Getty came in and everyone made space for him to sit by Sienna at the table. They clearly knew they were together."

Before he was married Balthazar was romantically linked with Drew Barrymore and Milla Jovovich.
Yeah, it sucks when some rich dude leaves his wife and kids to shack up with some hot young Hollywood thing, but to us that's not really the point here. The real point is that Balthazar Getty is finally making gossip headlines, just like our thirteen-year-old self imagined he would as we watched Lord of the Flies for the thirty-seventh time. Hopefully this will mean a resurgence in popularity for teen stars of the early '90s. Maybe next week Wil Wheaton will get popped for DUI. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 25, 2008

Sienna Miller Stuffs

sienna miller block face with hands.jpg And speaking of Sienna Miller, she needs bigger tits. Well, at least according to one director. Also via The San Francisco Chronicle:
Actress Sienna Miller had to wear fake breasts for her role in forthcoming action movie "G.I. Joe," because her own cleavage was not big enough for director Stephen Sommers.

Miller joins Dennis Quaid and Brendan Fraser to play femme fatale The Baroness in the upcoming movie, which is based on the popular toys and TV series.

But Miller admits she was left slightly stunned when Sommers told her that her small chest had to be given an extra boost so she would look more curvaceous on screen.

She says, "(I wear a) tight black leather outfit. And much bigger boobs.

"They gave me these things that looked like chicken fillets. The director said, 'I'm gonna be honest, I like girls with big boobs,' and I don't have them so we made them bigger.

"At least he's honest. But I was mildly offended."
Sure, the hot chick in a summer blockbuster action movie needs big bazooms. That's understandable. But this Stephen Sommers may have a bit of a problem, as we heard he requested the same wardrobe enhancement for Elijah Wood in his adaptation of Huck Finn. That just looked weird. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

Jerry Springer Gives Final Thought to Kate Moss

kate_moss_drunk.jpgWhen stars have serious problems, they usually seek out advice and a sympathetic ear from a respected professional. Britney Spears sees top psychiatrists in Los Angeles, several B-listers seek out the help of Dr. Drew, Mike Myers bros down with Deepak Chopra. And when it comes to venting about her best friend Rhys Ifans getting dumped by Sienna Miller, powder-loving supermodel Kate Moss sits down for a tete-a-tete with Jerry Springer. Yes. Jerry Springer. According to our personal gossip guru, FemaleFirst, the two have been meeting up at the Dorchester hotel in London for serious rap sessions:
A source told Britain's Daily Star newspaper: "She's got a lot on her mind and she tends to take on her friends' problems and concerns as well. Jerry has patiently listened to her worries and given her some sterling advice. Instead of hating Sienna for upsetting her friend, Kate has managed to see things from her perspective and has calmed down about the whole, sorry affair. This unlikely therapy has turned her into a new woman."
Furthermore, Kate was overheard calling Sienna "that five dolla weave-ass ho!" before Sienna told Kate to "git yer fat trash ass outta here afore I git a switch n' pound the tar outta you!" Then Steve Wilkos separated the two and everyone celebrated by getting their Jerry beads. Yaaaayy! JerRY! JerRY JerRy! more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 23, 2008

Burnt Sienna

sienna miller wears dumb clothes.jpg Today we've got a bit of a Sienna Miller grab bag for you. First she talks about her boobs. Then she talks about her boobs some more. OK, so we guess it's not really a grab bag. Unless by "bag" we mean "nutsack". If that's the case, then Sienna Miller talking about her titties is most definitely a grab bag. Our own personal breast specialist, FemaleFirst, reports:
Sienna Miller burnt her boobs while making her new movie.

The 26-year-old actress revealed the accident happened when she was filming a stunt for action blockbuster 'G.I. Joe'.

She revealed: "I had every intention of working out but it just didn't happen - I've never been to the gym.

"I got burnt boobs, I ran the wrong way under an explosion. It was my own fault, I'm clumsy, there's a little scar."

Sienna - who stripped off in 'Factory Girl' and the forthcoming 'Hippie Hippie Shake' - also admitted she finds nude scenes uncomfortable because of "perverts" on set.

She added: "The damage is done, everything's been seen! It's a little bit awkward at the time. There's the odd perve in the corner."
Because this is Sienna Miller here, and the total wardrobe cost for the duration of her career thus far has been about $87, we're assuming that Sienna's boobs were burnt because she was running away from an explosion in the nude, in slow motion. We're also assuming that particular scene will eat up at least 40 minutes of screen time, which will help G.I. Joe beat every single box-office record in history. Yea for Sienna's scones! more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 19, 2008

Sienna Miller Trades Rhys for Rhys

sienna miller stringy hair open mouth.jpg For weeks we've been hearing about how Sienna Miller is super broken up about her split with Rhys Ifans. We're pretty sure that secretly she's saying, "Whoohoo! No more shedding on the sofa!" But in public she's all "It's a difficult time" and "I'd appreciate my privacy on this personal matter." Someone needs to tell Sienna then that she shouldn't be smooching on some dude who shares her ex-boyfriend's delightfully British name. It's kind of like Hulk Hogan porking a lady who looks just like his daughter; these are not things that we have the ability to ignore. Our own personal Rhysologist, FemaleFirst, says:
Sienna Miller couldn't keep her hands off her co-star at the premiere of her new movie last night (18.06.08).

The actress was seen gazing into Matthew Rhys' eyes at the Edinburgh premiere of their film 'The Edge of Love'.

Sienna, who recently split from Welsh actor Rhys Ifans over his alleged jealousy of her close relationship with Matthew, briefly dated Matthew last year.

An onlooker said: "They looked really close. They had their arms around each other and didn't care about the cameras."

The pair first met when filming first started last year on 'The Edge of Love', which is about Welsh poet Dylan Thomas.
Watch out, Jonathan Rhys Meyers! Sienna's coming for you next. We figure you've got about six months to legally change your name to Bill Smith or something. Then Sienna will just have to move on down the celebrity Rhys line to Indiana Jones star John Rhys-Davies. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 10, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: CBT

on-the-doll-balls-1.jpgBrittany Snow not naked, but well-versed in cock and ball torture in On the Doll! (Fatback)

• In case you were wondering if Pam Anderson's nipples were still inching their way towards her armpits, the answer is a resounding yes! (Taxi Driver)

• Abigail Clancy: dumpy name, glamorous naked boobs in a bikini. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Despite her assertions to the contrary, Jessica Alba is most definitely shopping around pics of her baby. (Cityrag)

• Awwww. Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson, happy and hugging. Not as exciting as groaning and fingerblasting, but we make do with what we're given. (Yeeeah!)

Sienna Miller enjoys sleeping with . . . . . . . . . . . Heath Ledger's pajamas. (CelebWarship)

Heather Locklear throws some gang signs. Yo yo yo, northeast siiiiiide, Bev Hills, dis ya girl Heathuh! Brentwoooooood! Respect! (The Blemish)

• Paul Newman has lung cancer. Noooooooooooooooooooooooo. (Hollywire)

Elizabeth Hurley continues to dress her son like he's Little Lord Fauntleroy. (Allie Is Wired)

• Does Christina Aguilera have her eye on another, nonsimian man? (Hollyscoop)

• Firecrotch-spouter Brandon Davis has gone from Fat Elvis to slightly less fat Elvis. (Faded Youth)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 04, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Rhys Is in Pieces

sienna_rhys_breakup.jpgSienna Miller finally cuts loose her improbably-named, leonine lover Rhys Ifans. (CeleBuzz)

• Angry whelp Miley Cyrus wrecks equipment on the set of her new video. "Grrrr! I'm so mad! Like a bear! Grrr! Like a fluffy bear! With a bow around its neck! Grrr . . . awwww." (Drunken Stepfather)

Kim Kardashian and Vanessa Minnillo dressed as cheerleaders, Carmen Electra in jazzercise gear. You're welcome, pre-verts. (The Hollywood Gossip)

• The fetus is out there. And by "there" we mean in Gillian Anderson's womb. (F-Listed)

• Oh yeah, Charlie Sheen married Brooke Whatsherguts last weekend. We didn't report on it because it didn't involve insulting Denise Richards. (Allie Is Wired)

Lily Allen's hair is pink, her face is green, and her liver is pickled yellow. Fun drunk shots! Luv u Lily. (Derek Hail)

Astley Tisdale: prepare for mass RickRollage. (The Blemish)

Vanity Fair is in deep shit for implying that Gina Gershon let Bill Clinton's presidential peen into her Oval Office. Crystal Connors, NO! (Defamer)

Eva Longoria is sporting what appears to be an inflated pregnancy rack, highlighted by the most burnt sienna of tan-spackle. (D-listed)
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

May 21, 2008

Sienna Wants Rhys to Exit, Stage Left

sienna_rhys.jpgAs eternal love blooms for the newly wedded Wentzes and Warrens, love withers and dies like a hothouse flower for blonde Pittsburgh-hater Sienna Miller and her actor fiance, Rhys Ifans. Apparently, Sienna is disgusted that Rhys has turned out to be exactly like her former fiance Jude Law, which means that after the inevitable breakup, Rhys has a stellar future getting his nuts fondled in a garden by Kimberly Stewart. Showbiz Spy reports:
Sienna Miller and Rhys Ifans are reportedly on the verge of a split. Hot on the heels of engagement rumors, Sienna is said to be struggling to cope with Rhys’ possessiveness; and his behavior reminds her of ‘controlling’ ex-boyfriend Jude Law.

A source says, “Rhys gets very jealous - he hates her socializing with other men and always wants to know where she is and who she’s with. During a row she yelled at him: ‘It’s just like being with Jude’.

“Rhys freaked out, because he prides himself on being the laid-back opposite of Jude. But he just gets worked up seeing men admiring his girlfriend and trying to hit on her.”

Tensions between the pair have worsened due to work commitments. Sienna has been filming GI Joe in America while Rhys has been working in the UK.

“They had a huge bust up recently,” the friend added. “Sienna promised to spend a week with Rhys. He arranged his filming schedule, but at the last minute she canceled her trip, saying she had to work. Rhys hit the roof when he called her and found out she was partying in LA.”
Actually, we think Sienna probably just got a sober look at Ifans in the cold hard light of day and realized she was engaged to a combination of Riff Raff from Rocky Horror and Snagglepuss. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

May 13, 2008

Sienna Miller Hates Nudity, Takes off Top Anyway

Sienna Miller and Santa Claus.gif Here's the thing, ladies: If you're an actress and you have a penchant for taking out your titties whenever the cameras are rolling, your daddy's gonna see them. So if you don't like the idea of your papa peeping what on any other human would turn him on, then go into real estate or accounting. Or hire a hitman. Or keep your shirt on. Otherwise, Sienna Miller, we don't want to hear about how embarrassed you are that your dad saw your raspberries. Contact Music dishes:
Actress SIENNA MILLER hates stripping off on-screen - because she can't stand the idea of her father seeing her naked.

The blonde beauty worries so much about her beloved dad seeing her in steamy scenes, she warns him to cover his eyes when she appears undressed.

She says, "I get embarrassed, especially if my dad watches them. I get embarrassed watching them myself. But sometimes you just have to do it."

But the British star insists on performing realistic sex scenes - by refusing to wear a bra in bed.

Miller explains, "It has to be realistic and I think it is probably very rare that people have sex with their bra on so if you are going to do it, just do it. That's my motto."
We've got a simple solution for Sienna: Tell Dad to only go to the movies that don't focus on her cajooblies. Like, uh, that one . . . what was it called? Oh no, she wasn't in that one. Well, there was . . . hmmmm. We're drawing a blank here. Surely she's been in one movie that we've heard of where she's not showing off her headlights. Right? One? OK, maybe not. But we do respect Sienna's dedication to realism. Dad's just gonna have to suck it up and pretend that all of Sienna's movies employ the world's most adept body double. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

April 14, 2008

Sienna Miller Pops Her Top for the 87th Time

sienna_miller_naked-bikini_1.jpgWe cannot recall any movies that have been released in the past year that star Sienna Miller; however, we can name each time, place, and body part shown when it comes to Sienna appearing nude in public in the same time frame. Mostly because it happens every day. You'd think it would get old, but like other daily tasks such as brushing our teeth, emptying our colostomy bag, and humping our Xuxa doll, it's an occurrence that never seems to lose its sparkle! Follow the click through the cut and you will find yourself in a mysterious parallel universe where Sienna Miller's breasts bust their way through a bikini top.
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

March 13, 2008

Bottoms Up from Betrothed Sienna Miller

sienna_miller_bikini_ass_1.jpgOnce upon a dream, Sienna Miller was the toast of the town, sweeping into premieres in designer finery and on the arm of cherub-curled Jude Law, with movie scripts being thrown at her like candy at a parade. Then Jude stuffed it into the nanny, and Sienna beat up some paparazzi, metaphorically crapped on the city of Pittsburgh, and then forgot to wear pants, and we were left wondering what she's been up to lately. As it turns out, she's been up to an actor named Rhys Ifans, and, according to our gossip relationship counselor, FemaleFirst, she's agreed to marry him. A source says:
"Rhys has admitted he and Sienna are getting married. Everything is supposed to be hush-hush, but Rhys is over the moon and finding it hard to keep quiet. He can't believe she finally said yes."
Seeing how Rhys Ifans is a Welshman who looks a lot like Snagglepuss and has a name that sounds like a prancing centaur that lives in the forest behind Hogwarts, this story probably should be more exciting than it is. So let's jazz it up with some Sienna Miller butt cheeks! Come into our cut and we will show you the way. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (3) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

January 24, 2008

The Mysteries of Titsburgh

mena_suvari_tattoo.jpgThe Mysteries of Pittsburgh screened at Sundance the other day. You might not be familiar with the title of this film, because it's generally known by its Sienna Miller-given moniker, The Mysteries of Shitsburgh. Our eagle-eyed Sundance spy sent the following nudity report:
(0:05) Mena Suvari’s breasts are seen as she rides a guy in a bookstore.
(0:51) Sienna Miller gives us some quick breast shots while she’s in bed with Peter Sarsgaard.
(1:03) Breasts and buns from Sienna Miller during sex with Jon Foster.
With a title like The Mysteries of Pittsburgh, we just kind of assumed that it would be about a young girl's quest to uncover the fries that lurk beneath the slaw on a Primanti Bros. sandwich. As it turns out, it's actually the harrowing tale of Mena and Sienna's quest to uncover their T & A. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

January 17, 2008

Sienna Miller: Relationship Assassin

sienna miller wears tights as pants.jpg We've just discovered the perfect excuse for every occasion: It's Sienna Miller's fault! Why did those puppies eat rat poison instead of kibble? It's Sienna Miller's fault! Why can't Hollywood writers and studios come to a compromise? It's Sienna Miller's fault! Why is there war, disease, famine, and tights worn as pants? It's Sienna Miller's fault! (That last one really is Sienna Miller's fault.) Hey, if it works for Sean Penn. Rush & Molloy report:
There's never a simple reason for a couple to part after 20 years. But if Sienna Miller didn't cause Sean Penn and Robin Wright Penn to split up, some claim she may not have been a good influence.

A source recalls a party in a suite at a New York hotel where they both were staying.

"Sienna was sitting on Sean's lap," according the source. "She was dressed very sexily. She had her arm around his neck." That night, claims the source, they stayed up quite late.

One Penn friend maintains there was never anything romantic between them. "Sienna is like that with everyone," says the friend. "She's very physical. She drapes herself over people she likes. She doesn't mean a lot by it."

Miller's rep insists that suggestions that the actress, now dating Rhys Ifans, was ever more than friends with Penn are "outrageously untrue. Sienna is a very good friend of Robin. She adores and respects Robin."

Still, you wonder if the up-till-dawn scene might trouble a wife left home with two kids.
We're sure that when confronted by Robin, Sienna defended herself thusly: "What's the big deal, old lady? Not everyone likes to stay home and knit while watching PBS. Some of us like to party. And by party I mean rub my cooter all over your husband's leg and run my tongue down the side of his face while he watches strippers who are not nearly as hot as me. It's the friendly thing to do, and I'm a friendly girl."
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

October 31, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: When the Zubas Come Off

mug shot amy fisher.jpg• Make way for the Amy Fisher sex tape. Wonder if she gets fuoco'ed in the butta? (PopCrunch)

Bai Ling in her natural state in Photographie magazine; i.e., nips out. (Nudography)

• Hot holy shit on a cracked pepper cracker, is Angelina Jolie growing Infant Superbeauty El Gorgeoso Baby Part II in her womb part? (Derek Hail)

• Well, Jennifer Lopez sure is, says her costume designer. (GlossLip)

Lindsay Lohan will not be hosting a large, alcohol and drug-soaked party in Las Vegas. Well, shit. Now how are we supposed to ring in 2008? (Yeeeah!)

Sienna Miller continues the true hippie spirit of free love and no bras. (The Blemish)

• God bless America. My bone, sweeeeeet booooonnnnne. (Seriously? OMG! WTF?)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

October 09, 2007

Crack Open the Can of Miller

sienna_hide.jpgIt's Millah time! Wait until your direct supervisor (or your mom, whatever) has vacated the premises, then click on "more" and dig, if you will, some pictures. Of Sienna Miller engaged in a skinny dip. No scrap of clothing covers thee. Can you, my reader, can you picture this? more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

September 25, 2007

Nudity-Hating Sienna Miller and Kate Moss in Showcase Showdown

sienna_miller_ali.jpgShe may be a stilted actress, she may don belts across her chestral region, but she's one of the only modern actresses willing to pony up for Sexy Lady Stories. Sienna Miller week continues here at CNW, and the former penis snood of Jude Law is now angry that her nude shots from Hippie Hippie Shake were leaked. Sources told The Sun:
“Sienna was really hurt. She took some persuading to do the scenes and spent most of the day in her dressing gown building up to it. She is reluctant to do the rest of her nude scenes.”
Yes, if there is anything Sienna Miller is wary of, it's nudity. She's definitely never been naked here. Or here. And especially not here. So you can see why she'd be petulant and threaten to withhold her beans because she was showing her beans in a movie that would be widely distributed so everyone would see her beans. Beans.

After the cut, Sienna and Kate Moss catfight. In the battle of the scrawny British blondes with questionable taste in the opposite sex, only one can emerge victorious. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

September 24, 2007

Keira Knightley and Sienna Miller on The Edge of Lez

keira_sienna.jpgKeira "Tits" Knightley and Sienna "Shitsburgh" Miller just wrapped up filming The Edge of Love, in which they play the wife and mistress of poet Dylan Thomas, who end up slamming clams. Sienna gives us a taste of what's to come:
"The bath scene is very erotic. There's been a lot of talk about it and I suppose the whole lesbian ménage-a-trois thing is great publicity for the film. Keira plays the temptress and I play a more reserved person. The setting in the Welsh hills couldn't be more sensual or entrancing."
One writer, two dames, possible tribadism. So it's like Henry and June, only with rolling green hills and sea mist and even funnier accents. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

September 14, 2007

Hippie Hippie Shake It To Sienna Miller Nudes

sienna hides.jpg We aren't one to look a gift boob in the nipple, but this week has been filled with nude sights that we've seen many, many times before (i.e., Kate Moss's Tootsie Roll nips and Britney Spears's very, very tired clam). So we were hoping for something a bit different today. Say, maybe Kirsten Dunst drunk, topless, and playing the tambourine in Times Square. Or Katie Holmes attending a fashion show with one entire ta-ta hanging out of her Gucci blouse. But instead we've got Sienna Miller naked and hippiefied. Which is at least a change from Sienna Miller naked and Warholified. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

September 04, 2007

Sienna Miller Is a Shy Violet

sienna_drunk.jpgSienna Miller not only hates the many picturesque bridges, Primanti sandwiches, and Iron City Light of "Shitsburgh", she also really hates photographers, whose flicks of the flashbulb are like unwanted penises straight to her very core. But she loves booze! Last night, she went one tipple over the line and screamed at photographers who were covering the launch of her clothing store. Reports The Sun:
The actress, who looked severely the worse for wear, was at the opening of her new fashion shop Twenty8Twelve in London's smart Notting Hill. She was there with "friend" Rhys Ifans, who was hitting the sauce heavily as well. She shouted: "Fuck off, you fucking shits" and "See you in court, you fucking rapists." One photographer who was at the launch said he was shocked at the outburst. He said: "I was quite flabbergasted. We were just doing our jobs, all we were trying to do was get some quotes on how the opening of the shop went and she called us all rapists. It's an outrageous term to use for such a petty little thing as being at a party and being photographed. It was completely the wrong context to use that word."
When someone says "class, breeding, and culture," we automatically think "Sienna Miller". Sure, Audrey Hepburn and Princess Diana flashed through our minds for a second there, but when you hold up those two next to a frequently shirtless supporting player who is famous for being she-cuckolded by a potato-faced nanny and wearing Uggs and a sheet, the choice is clear. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

August 22, 2007

Sienna Miller Eradicates Evil with Naked Knockers

sienna_miller_topless_1.jpgHere's actress/possible penis cozy to Puffy Doodles, Sienna Miller, topless on the beach in Ibiza. Did you know that the correct pronunciation of Ibiza is "Ee-bee-thuh?" And if you click the thpot that thayth "more", you can thee her boobth. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

August 09, 2007

Siennakini, Now with Extra Haberdashery

sienna-miller-bikini-1.jpgHere's Sienna Miller, taking a much-needed break from her busy schedule of Diddy-diddling and wearing stupid crap. Oh wait, she's still wearing stupid crap. Yes, only fashion icon Sienna could take a normally comely get-up such as the common bikini and render it completely vomitous with the addition of a Peg Bundy shawl, a crusty scowl, and a hat that used to belong to Panama Jack. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's still Sienna Miller in a bikini, but you know what? We spent the entire morning being forced to stare at pictures Kevin Federline, and of Amy Winehouse's missing tooth. We need an assuaging balm for the eyeballs, and the best we could scare up were pics of an oft-nude girl, fully clothed. But hey, at least Anakin Skywalker isn't rasping about "makin' gods outta garbage" while sticking his light saber into her, right? Now that's turning that frown upside down!

sienna-miller-bikini-2.jpg sienna-miller-bikini-3.jpg sienna-miller-bikini-4.jpg
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------