CelebNewsWire - The skinny. The scoop. The Hollywood poop. Wherever there is a nipple slip, we'll be there. If there's a party, you'll find us doing shots with Lindsay Lohan and upskirt flashing alongside Britney Spears. Wherever Paris Hilton is breaking the law, you'll see us. If there's a celebrity sex tape, we will find it. Nude stars, drunk stars, scandals, hookups, breakups? Let CelebNewsWire be your guide. Hold our hands. Come inside.

filed under: Megan Fox

July 03, 2008

Megan Fox Bags BAG

megan_fox_grabs_brian_austin_greens_crotch.jpg When you're the bitchy rival in a little-seen Lindsay Lohan joint that features a mash-up of Eliza Doolittle and David Bowie (seriously), getting engaged to a former teen soap star/once aspiring white rapper seems like a good idea, a possible career boost. But once you've starred in a huge Michael Bay movie opposite Shia TheBeef and roughly 99.99999% of earth's human population wants to touch your yabbos (Clay Aiken would rather give her a firm handshake and compliment her talent, out of respect), it's time to ditch the loser. Which is precisely what Megan Fox did. According to Contact Music:
TRANSFORMERS star MEGAN FOX has reportedly called off her engagement to actor fiance BRIAN AUSTIN GREEN.

Sources claim the pretty brunette, 22, sent business associates correspondence last week (beg23Jun08) alerting them to the sad news.

An insider says, "Megan still cares about Brian, but she now realises she's too young to marry him."
This girl's got brains! We see her career going in a whole new direction now. And we don't mean that whole next-Angelina-Jolie thing she's being saddled with. We see her more filling the shoes of recently-departed-from-television Montel Williams. She would be the perfect person to say, "Honey, get rid of him, he's a loser. Your next boyfriend needs to have three things: 1) a job, 2) a lock on the liquor cabinet, and 3) a full set of teeth." Although we're not sure if she has any experience administering paternity tests, so maybe that career path isn't a well-thought-out option. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

July 01, 2008

Megan Fox: More than Meets the Eye; Diva in Disguise

megan_fox_water_bottle.jpgDivahood is a slippery slope. Just ask Jennifer Lopez. One day she was requesting Miracle Whip instead of Hellman's for her sandwich on the set of Selena, and the next thing you know she's requiring four enchanted poodles (standard size ONLY, please) to carry her from trailer to set using a platinum rickshaw. So Megan Fox best check herself now. That Other Blog reports:
The super sweet and humble Megan Fox knows she’s the star of Transformers 2 and ain’t letting no hoes take away her spotlight.

Star Magazine reports that she has banned producers from casting other attractive brunette actresses in the sequel.

A spy says, "Megan is definitely the star of the sequel, and she wants to keep it that way. It’s fine with her if there are hot blondes in the film, but she’s made it clear that she doesn’t want any brunettes."
Well, see, keep in mind that the film's director, Michael Bay, requires but one thing of Megan: "look hot". So basically, Megan's just taking extra care to do her job well. She's going that extra mile. That impetuous upstart! She's going places! Like a young Lee Iacocca. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 20, 2008

Megan Fox's Job Description: Look Hot

Megan Fox sqats pees.jpg Barring his emotional daddy-daughter "I'm gonna blow up, but don't you be sad, you've got hunky Ben Affleck to comfort you" scene between Bruce Willis and Liv Tyler in Armageddon (we know you cried, tough guy), Michael Bay isn't exactly known for deep personal interactions in his films. So it's no surprise that all he's looking for from his newest leading actress is a pretty face. Lusted after BAG schtupper and onetime Lohan costar Megan Fox scooped the poop on Transformers 2 to MTV.com:
“As big as the first movie was, this is 10 times as big, 10 times as many set pieces, explosions, and acrobatic stunts,” she told us about “Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. “Shia and I make out a little bit; I don’t know if anyone wants to see that.”

“You know, we’ve been having script meetings, and we’ve been reworking the script, because they wrote it fast because of the writer’s strike,” she explained. “And, we’ve just been going through and trying to do some character stuff for Shia and myself in the middle of this crazy world that they’re in.”

“I can tell you that we’re on locations in some really exotic places,” she added. “It’s just going to be a badass movie. It’s just going to be a popcorn-visual-spectacle, summer film.”

As for Michael Bay’s main directorial input to his lead actress, Megan had this to say: “His main note to me is just to look hot; so I try my best.”
Wonder what Bay's notes to The Beef were. Look tough? Brood? Where did he learn his directorial genius, George Lucas? more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 18, 2008

Megan Fox Has a Naked . . . . . . . . . . . Finger

megan_fox_tongue.jpgWe've long wondered why America's Next Sexiest Sexy Lady Megan Fox was engaged to Brian Austin Green. Turns out that Megan has long wondered that, too, and on the set of her new movie, she's been acting suspiciously BAGless. According to Star:
An insider on the set of Megan's movie Jennifer's Body says that the 22-year-old didn't act like she was taken. "I've never seen her wearing an engagement ring. I actually thought she and Adam Brody, who's also in the movie, were dating. They were very flirty with each other and were always hanging out together when they weren't working." But her good pal, actress Jennifer Blanc, tells Star that despite her leaving the rock at home, Megan is indeed still engaged. "She does wear it sometimes," insists Jennifer. "I've never asked her why she doesn't always put it on."
Brian Austin Green aka David Silver. Adam Brody aka Seth Cohen. Sounds like old Megan has a type: resident dork on FOX show. Well hell, Meg, if we had known that we would have shown up to your house in costume as that wheelchair kid from Malcolm in the Middle ages ago. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

May 12, 2008

David Silver Puts His Thingie Into This

megan_fox_topless_1.jpgLast month, we reported that Megan Fox would be getting topless in her new movie, Jennifer's Body. And guess what, America? In your collective face! We were totally right! Of course we said that her jugs would be covered in her own hair and they're actually covered in nipple-hued pasties, but God, man, you don't complain when Nostradamus said "Two brothers torn apart by Chaos while the fortress endures" instead of "attacks on big buildings on September 11", right? Even though it's not real nudity, please come into our cut to eyeball Megan's twin towers.




megan_fox_topless_2.jpg megan_fox_topless_3.jpg
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

May 07, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Megan Fox Gets Plump

megan_fox_lips_plumped.jpg• Megan Fox takes "next Angelina Jolie" title literally, gets lipplants. (ONTD)

• Elisha Cuthbert stalks the sandy landscape in a bikini; cuddles muscular male; gets handsy with own buttocks. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon's wedding photos will be in People. And they talk about being "soul mates". Even though they've known each other for six weeks. (Celebitchy)

• What mysterious pull do these Maddens have? Lindsay Lohan was busted trying to pick up Joel (that's Nicole Richie's Madden, not Paris Hilton's Madden) at a club the other night. There's not enough Maddens to go around. (Yeeeah!)

• Angelina Jolie is reportedly going to have twin girls. They'll have their mother's looks and their father's . . . looks. They can't go wrong! (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• Amy Winehouse is slowly devolving from soulful songstress to drunken party girl to crackhead to missing link to ape. Photographic evidence exists. (Holy Taco)

• Uma Thurman's name begins with a "u". So does the word "upskirt". Aaaand that's the closest we cam come to a joke here. (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• In other Lohan news, she's still stealing clothing from her friends. Because when girls' daddies don't love them, the fill up their hearts with pilfered fur. (The Blemish)

• Blake Lively may play a high schooler on Gossip Girl, but that rack is alllll freshman year at a state U, baby. (Fatback)

• Jessica Simpson must, she must, she must increase her bust. (Cityrag)

• Post-birth, Halle has some Berry nice cleavage. We knew our childhood obsession with Strawberry Shortcake speak would come in handy some day! (Flisted)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

May 05, 2008

Megan Fox Has More In Common With Winona Ryder Than Just a Penchant for Dating Lame-os

megan_fox_lick.jpgWhen FHM's Sexiest Woman in the World Megan Fox needs a garlic press, a giant tub of Tresemme Tres Spray, some smelly trees for her car, and a pack of Hanes Her Ways, where does she go? Alas, not Wal-Mart. That place may be rolling back prices, but the prices do not roll for thee, Megan. IDLYITW reports that Megan has been banned from the much-maligned megachain because she hamburgled some lip gloss from them as a teen:
Fox was caught stealing make-up from a Florida branch of the Wal-Mart during her rebellious teenage years. And the incident has now seen her banned from the store. A friend of the star tells the tabloid, "Megan (Fox) was quite a rebel growing up. She thought she could get away with anything, and definitely had sticky fingers. "She would pocket things like candy and gum from convenience stores, but Megan's shoplifting days were quickly put to an end when she got busted for heisting a $7 tube of lipgloss from Wal-Mart. "At first, Megan denied it. Even after they told her they caught her on surveillance video, Megan still tried talking her way out of it. But when they threatened to call the police, Megan broke down in tears and confessed."
What kind of cruel, Guantanamo Bay-style tactics did those dastardly Wal-Martians use on our lovely Megan to coerce that confession? Force-feeding her that shitty popcorn they sell in the front? Making her wear certain kicky selections from the Jacklyn Smith collection? We don't know, but we do know what else Megan Fox has stolen. Our hearts. And, apparently, our pants. Give those back, you lovable scamp! more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

April 24, 2008

Megan Fox Is Sexier Than Everybody

Megan_Fox_eye_roll.jpgThe next time your girlfriend or wife asks you, "Do you think I'm sexy? Am I the sexiest woman in the world?" you have the right to answer "no" and feel good about it. Because your wife or girlfriend is not the sexiest woman in the world. Megan Fox is. And when your wife or girlfriend expresses her disgust, you can just be like, "But honey! FHM said! FHM said!" And then she will take the magazine and beat you about the nards with it. But enough romance! FHM has, indeed, come out with their annual "Sexiest Woman in the World" poll, and the top ten are as follows:



1. Megan Fox
2. Jessica Biel
3. Jessica Alba
4. Elisha Cuthbert
5. Scarlett Johansson
6. Emmanuelle Chriqui
7. Hilary Duff
8. Tricia Helfer
9. Blake Lively
10. Kate Beckinsale

"Sexiest Woman in the World" is a pretty broad--not to mention bold--category. Notice that all the actresses on the list are American or British. Right now the hottest woman of the Mursi tribe in Ethiopia is pretty pissed at her dis. She has the biggest lip plate of all!

Here are some pictures of the Foxy Ms. Fox with a . . . fox. And, uh, some other beasts.

1thumb.jpg 2thumb.jpg 3thumb.jpg 4thumb.jpg 5thumb.jpg
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (4) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

April 14, 2008

Juno That Megan Fox Gets Topless In the New Diablo Cody Flick?

megan_fox_hot_water_bottle.jpgJuno screenwriter Diablo Cody and director/producer Jason Reitman have once again teamed up to create cloyingly precious Oscar gold! The upcoming movie Jennifer's Body is currently being filmed in Canada. But instead of Ellen Page rattling off dialogue like "frosted mini-fetus", we'll have Amanda Seyfried and Megan Fox having a catfight in their underwear. Huzzah! And furthering the plot, according to Bitten and Bound: Megan Fox's yammos!
Word straight out of Jason Reitman’s mouth is that Fox will appear nude from the waist up in a scene where she lures an unsuspecting male into the woods. Reitman revealed this information while appearing on The Howard Stern Show last week. The nudity will be discreetly covered by Megan’s hair.
Hair? Discreet? Poppycock. You would think that the screenwriting lady who used to strip could at the very least toss in a boob or two. A nipple. Something. It's her script. Can't she go in with a ballpoint and cross out the "covered with her hair" part and write in "naked Megan Fox with no hair at all covering any part of her in any sort of discreet manner ever"? Actually, this is Diablo Cody, she would write "Nick-at-Nite-Nakey Foxy-Fox flippin' the bald eagle Brazilian bare Hostess tit-cakes, for schloozle!" And she would write it with a hamburger pen. It doesn't matter that hamburger pens don't exist. She'd invent one. more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

April 04, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Eatin' Kids, Beatin' Pigs

hayden_child.jpg• Bite-sized Heroes star Hayden Panettiere volunteered at World Children's Day, where she proceeded to devour all the babies under age two and pick her teeth with their discarded, semi-gnawed rib bones. (The Blemish)

• Even when you take away her hand-held communication devices and remove her from the vicinity of assistants, Naomi Campbell will come out swinging and hissing and--yes--spitting. (Yeeeah!)

• Brandon Davis, alias "Greasy Bear", aka "Fat Elvis", is no longer anti-Firecrotch. He's decided he hates black people and gays way more. (TMZ)

• Angelina Jolie at a nubile sixteen! Before the blood, the Brad, the Billy Bob, the babies there was . . . really unflattering 1990s bathing suits with curious sheer cut-outs? (Egotastic)

• Mena Suvari's crapper is delectable in a thong. Do we mean "butt" or "toilet"? Click here to find out the shocking answer! (Drunken Stepfather)

• Anne Hathaway's boyfriend was arrested for bouncing a $250,000 check. Aw, that could happen to anyone. Oh, wait, we though that said "$2.50 check". (Celeb Warship)

• Who wears assless shorts? Gisele Bundchen wears assless shorts. (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• I got fingered by Megan Fox (and it felt like a kiss). (Hollywood Tuna)

• Lucky Kristen Bell gets to pose on the cover of Cosmopolitan next to the blurb "When Your Boobs Act Weird". (Daily Stab)

• Jerry Seinfeld flipped his car. He's OK though, so we can all have a hearty guffaw or whatever. (Holy Taco)

• Cameron Diaz is looking very Amazonian in GQ. (Bitten and Bound)

• Tom Cruise takes Suri to the playground. Not to play, though. To have a series discussion about SPs and OC Clears. (A Socialite's Life)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

February 28, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: The Dealie with Keeley

keeley_hazell.JPG • Keeley Hazell makes Breast Actress, Mr. Skin makes The Sun. (The Sun)

• Angelina's having a girl, and she's having her in France! Freedom birth! (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• Non, non! She is having deux bebes! Having zem in L'Etats-Unis! Oui oui oui! (FemaleFirst)

• Lohan dons crotch-strangling short shorts in February, because she is dedicated to her craft. The craft of being a saucy harlot. (Hollywood Tuna)

• Nicole Richie shows off her new baby. Quick, see the tiny cuteness before Rachel Zoe gives her gifts of Hoodia and hair extensions. (Celebitchy)

• Wisely realizing that her infamous recent nudie shots were the most popular thing she's ever done, Lindsay contemplates a future as a naked Marilyn Monroe impersonator. (Daily Stab)

• Kate Hudson coaxes butterscotch stallion Owen Wilson away from suicidal depression with a sugar cube, some carrots, and her vagina. (The Blemish)

• Lily Allen upskirts with cheeky results. (Taxi Driver)

• Now we know why Juliette Lewis has been wearing headbands all the time--they magically hold her nipples in. See what goes down when she goes without. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Awwww. Peter Andre soooo sweeeepy! Poor little guy's all tuckered out. (Seriously? OMG! WTF?)

• See where Megan Fox's tattooed ode to David Silver is located on her body. (Popoholic)

• Rachel Bilson owns underwear, and wants you to know all about it. (The Rad Report)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

February 20, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Boozin' and Coozin'

britney_bday.jpg• More oddly smooth Britney mons pubis. We're starting to think that maybe those are flesh-toned undies. Foiled! (Faded Youth)

• But she still can't see her chitlins. (The Hollywood Gossip)

• The bottle came between Jake Gyllenhaal and Kirsten Dunst. The bottle, and her baby vampire fangs. (Yeeeah!)

• Denise Richards says that exploiting her children in a reality show is fine, because they said yes when she asked them if they wanted to be on TV. They're two and three. If you asked them if they wanted to have live jellyfish sewn to their faces, they'd say "Yaaaay!" (I'm Not Obsessed)

• J. Lo has checked in to the hospital! She will now proceed to birth a child from each of her buns. (PopCrunch)

• Hilary's Duff, in a bikini. (Egotastic)

• The Heidi Klum-Seal family, in a traveling version of Cats. (Derek Hail)

• Megan Fox Jacks it. (Fatback)

• Alba pulls a Lindsay and recreates old junk in photos. Only without the boobs, natch. (The Blemish)

• OMG, Nicole Richie and Joel Madden actually left the house! They're such horrible parents! Alert DCFS! (Celeb Warship)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

January 30, 2008

Cryin' Brian Austin Green: "My Hot Girlfriend's Annoying. Boo Hoo."

brian austin green megan fox.jpg Brian Austin Green. Let's review the facts. He was the geekiest and most annoying character on a show full of really irritating people (Although, if memory serves, he was the originator of The Peach Pit After Dark, which might make him a genius). He had a (thankfully) failed rap career. He's easily confused with David Faustino, even if he does have half a foot on little Bud Bundy. His biggest accomplishment in the past ten years has been costarring in Freddie Prinze Jr.'s sitcom, which was so unwatched we weren't even aware of it's existence. He's dating a super hot 21-year-old with terrible tattoos. Which one of those doesn't quite fit? Could it be the last one? Are you wondering how such a pairing works? Easy. She's a demanding shrew and he's a weak little pussy. According to Bauer-Griffin Online:
At approximately 2:00pm at Daily grill in Studio City 90210 ex-star Brian Austin Green was dining with a male friend on the patio.

Our sources, who were seated at the next table, overheard an emotional Green ranting for over a hour about his troubled relationship with actress Megan Fox, who rocketed to stardom after last year's mega-hit blockbuster movie Transformers.

He began comparing Megan to the girl that he had been going out with before her who he'd broken up with for Fox, saying that Fox is behaving just like her. Apparently, the 21-year-old Transformer star is extremely set in her ways. The entire relationship was based on her terms, beginning with a "white board," upon which the pair would document the amount of time allotted to their relationship, family, and work. Green strove to maintain a fifty percent balance between time spent each other, and time spent apart. Fox, however, would sneak behind his back and erase planned dates with Green in order to have more time away from him. In fact, she would regularly cancel plans at the last moment, often by text. Throughout their turbulent relationship, Fox would threaten to get her lawyer involved in their disputes, while Green expressed his shock to his friend as he has never had a personal attorney in his "entire" life. He complained animatedly about how "unfair" their relationship was.

The obviously heart-broken Green went on to say that the young actress and budding star could never sit still and couldn't stand silence yet would moon in bed all day when they had a fight.

After ragging on Fox for close to an hour, the two men realized that the people at the table next to them might have overheard everything they said. Green seemed nervous and his friend asked the other diners if they had been eavesdropping because "that would be really bad." Looks like Fox has finally moved on!
God, she's sounds like a pill. Does she draw up a pre-sex diagram, complete with second-by-second instructions regarding how often he has to tweak her nipples and how many thrusts he has to complete before he can finish?
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (4) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

December 20, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: David Silver's Best Gal

megan_fox_tongue.jpg• Megan Fox seems to have misplaced her shirt. We all win! (Egotastic!)

• Brad Pitt thinks that orphans come from his anus. (Allie Is Wired)

• Britney's not the only one who enjoys mama's lollipops in front of Sean and JJ. Only Daddy's lollipops come in a pretty glass container and smell funny. (Yeeeah!)

• Fergie is coming clean about her dirtied drawers. (Cityrag)

• Ashley Tisdale's new nose gives you glad tidings. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Britney proves she owns undies. (Taxi Driver)

• Tony Parker is not just French, he's litigious. Doubly obnoxious! (Daily Stab)

• Tom Cruise's older children call Katie Holmes "Mom". They call Tom "Intergalactic Overlord Patriarchal Cyborg Unit #6599202B". (Celebitchy)

• Tara Reid sports a bikini. And what appears to be Ashton Kutcher's trucker hat from 2002. (The Blemish)

• Monica Bellucci has thingies. They're, like, round things. Kind of pinkish? They're a little bit below her collarbone. You know, whosiwhatsits. (Hollywood Tuna)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

December 12, 2007

Megan Fox And Lily Allen Trade Nip Slips

megan_fox_nipple_slip_1.jpgMegan Fox--she of the embarrassing tattoos and David Silver-defiled groin--has slipped a nip! Behold, the golden spigot of ambrosia flow! Bow down, serfs, to the sweet roseate disc of your reverie! Nip nip hooray! Also, Lily Allen does the same. Furthermore, observe the Fox pic at left, then take a gander at the Allen pic from right before her slip:

lily-allen-nipple-slip-1.jpg

These two women obviously have a small thread, undetectable by the naked eye, that connects their tongues to their dresses. Tongue goes out, nips pop. Tongue goes out, nips pop.
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

December 05, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: The People vs. Teri's Piehole

terieww.jpg• Teri Hatcher is being sued over lip gloss. The American justice system: serious business. (CelebTV)

• Heather Mills (McCartney) shows off her strawberry fields, forever. Do you wanna hold her glands? You might have a hard day's night, though she appears to be giving everyone a ticket to ride, so let's all come together, etc. etc. and so forth. (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• Cindy Crawford has cellulite. Whatever, like you wouldn't still masturbate with her discarded Kleenex. (Egotastic!)

• Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty are making beautiful drugs together. No, wait, we mean beautiful drugs. Shit, not drugs, drugs. Ack! Beautiful music, is what we mean. Wait, no. No, we did mean drugs. (Yeeeah!)

• Paris Hilton gets new lips; looks even more like Alice the Goon. (Derek Hail)

• Megan Fox does the old Uncle Joey "cut! it! out!" (Cityrag)

• John Maya is a str8 playa. (Daily Stab)

• Scarjo did not chop up her nose, and if you say so, she will sue your ass. (Celebitchy)

• Hayden Panettiere dons the 1989 soccer shorts; shows us her pegs. Make some sort of "score" or "goal" joke here, please. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Porn star Mary Carey is auctioning off her recently removed breast implants. A "portion" of the proceeds will go to the Susan G. Komen breast cancer foundation. The rest of the proceeds will go towards abusive puppy mills, toddler sweatshops, and terrorism. (The Blemish)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

October 16, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: Digging for Nuggets

tarasfall.jpg• Inspiring photo montage of Tara Reid in various stages of intoxication: the Sweaty Man-O-War, the Crotch Weeper, the Sunny Days Trailer Park Special, the Buttafuoco. (Cityrag)

• Teri Hatcher is a butt-picker. A picker of butts. (Taxi Driver)

• New Kim Kardashian sex tape footage coming soon. In your pants. Get it? Get it? Get it? Huh? Do you get it? Did you get that joke? Huh? Get it? NADS! (The Hollywood Gossip)

• Pamela Anderson is not pregnant, after all. Yeah, who cares, we have J. Lo to worry about now, babe, don't bother us. (GlossLip)

• Hilary Duff is a serious actress. You can tell by her lacy half-leggings and erect nipples. (The Blemish)

• Megan Fox is 3000% more attractive without drag queen makeup. Now, if only she could wash off the David Silver with some Pond's, we'd be set. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Wow, Scarlett Johansson sure is ugly. Isn't she a dog? Just look at her. Yuck. Man. (Daily Stab)

• Yikes, someone get Pete Doherty back on the drugs, pronto. (CelebWarship)

• Slice your wrists, get the girl. Kate Hudson is willing to give Owen Wilson another shot. In love. What did you think we meant? Oh, in the arm? Hahahaha, that's kind of funny. Here, take the keyboard, friend. (Yeeeah!)
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

July 09, 2007

Megan Fox Still Pretty; Talks Narcotics

megan_fox_sign.jpgMegan Fox Megan Fox Megan Fox Megan Fox Megan Fox. Meg! An! Fox!!! For a while, we were considering changing the name of this blog to "BritneySpearsShittyFashionNewsWire" but "MeganFoxNewsWire" would probably fare a little better, and also contain 89% less Axl Rose weave. Today, the abnormally attractive Transformers star actually talks about something besides her cruddy, cruddy tattoos! She told Maxim:
"I've done drugs, and that's how I know I don't like them. I wanted to try several things and make an informed decision, but I didn't enjoy anything other than marijuana. I don't even think of it as a drug - it should be legalized. Cocaine is back with a vengeance - everyone in every club is doing drugs. Celebrities aren't trying to hide it, except when people have camera phones. I know about five people who aren't on drugs today, and I'm one of them."
So who do you think are the other four? We're going to go with Daphne Zuniga, Ed Begley, Jr., and the Sprouse twins. Actually, the Sprouse twins are probably tweakers, and Begley "went green" years ago, if you know what we're saying, wink nudge. Probably the only drug-free celebrities are Scientologists. Except for Katie Holmes--noting her new, overly cheerful demeanor, we can only assume that she has some undercover ops delivering her some Zoloft via a bucket on a string, or a hollowed-out football.

Megan Fox! more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (1) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

July 03, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: Ambien And Candie's

scarlett_johansson_bullring.jpg• Scarlett Johansson dons septum piercing, (fake?) tattoo; dresses like Hot Lips Houlihan. (CityRag)

• Hunkosaurus Rex John Stamos blames his recent slurry interview on Ambien. Right now, David Hasselhoff and Paula Abdul are cursing themselves for not thinking of that one first. (Glitterati Gossip)

• Crack-addicted, clammy, rotten-toothed, smack-shooting, overgrown fetus cheats on beautiful multimillionaire supermodel icon. What? (Yeeeah!)

• Thanks to Fergie, product-plugging in songs is about to get even more prevalent. We can't wait for Jay-Z to namecheck Palmettos and for the new Avril Lavigne album, "Heartache and Kraft Singles, Which Are Made with 100% Real Milk". (Allie Is Wired)

• Michelle Rodriguez does public chin-ups, though she probably also does pubic chin-ups. With girls. (Derek Hail)

• The reason we haven't seen totally naked, total-body, high-def pics of Nick Lachey and Vanessa Minnillo full-on boning in a hot tub? M-O-N-E-Y. That, and the fact that no one really cares about 'em much. (Celebitchy)

• More Megan Fox. Now, 22% more see-through. (Popoholic)

• Eva Longoria has a serious problem involving an ass crack, hungry for spandex. (I Don't Like You In That Way)

AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 28, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: Snow Blower Over

penelope_cruz_bikini.jpg• Prince approached Penelope Cruz and sang a song just for her. Next week, we will see her in purple lingerie and a spiral perm, fronting the Penelope 6. (Celebrity Mound)

• Britney backed out of Cyndi Lauper's True Colors tour after she found out that "performing" meant "actually singing". "I cain't do that, y'all!" (A Socialite's Life)

• Like Paris, we love TMZ. Because not only do they post a picture of the reunited Spice Girls, they include a poll asking you to pick the ugliest. Yay! (TMZ)

• Paris Hilton told Larry King that she's never, ever done drugs. Because weed is a vegetable. (Evil Beet)

• Hayden Panettiere. She acts, she sings, she licks stuff. (Derek Hail)

• George Michael refuses to have an HIV test. That is careless, much like his whispers of yore. (RTE)

• When it comes to celebrities having large bags of silicon-oxygen polymers surgically placed inside their chest cavities, only one can be the victor and bring home the "shittiest implants title". (Cityrag)

• Megan Fox continues her unstoppable run of lookin'-over-my-shoulder-hey-check-out-my-wikkid-tatz red carpet posery. (Popoholic)

• Cops + racial statements = hijinks. No, not Mel Gibson . . . Vivica A. Fox! Speaking of terrible breast implants. (TMZ again)

• MK and Ashley Olsen are at loggerheads over Mary-Kate's mean boyfriend, Max Snow, who Ashley says puts down and mistreats her sister. MK says he often gets nasty, but it always blows over. Snow . . . blow . . . yeah. (FemaleFirst)
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (0) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 25, 2007

More Megan Fox, More Tattoos, More Sexy

megan_fox_maxim_1.jpgIf our stats are to be trusted, Transformers tomato Megan Fox and her tattooed torso seem to be a hit with the kids, so we decided to follow up. When we last left Megan, she showed off some iambic pentameter on her back, admitted that she had David Silver's name inked into her pubis, and alluded to a mysterious hidden tattoo of a self-penned poem. We were hoping for pegacorns or maybe something gothic with an abyss or two, but in the new issue of Maxim, she proudly shows it off: "There once was a little girl/who never knew love/until a boy broke her HEART". What in the Sam Hill, that isn't even a poem. That's the beginning of a parable. Or a failed limerick attempt at best. You get an F, Megan Fox. You fail Language Arts.
"Every time I get another tattoo, it's like a little F-you to anyone who told me not to."
Oooh, you bad. Allow me to temporarily break from the editorial "we" to say man, Megan Fox is totally in my face! But embarrassing ink and perceived badassedness aside, when you look like a cross between 1991 Cindy Crawford, 1972 Janice Dickinson, and 2001 Angelina Jolie, you can pretty much get a tattoo of a dolphin and a Grateful Bear holding hands and leaping over a tribal armband with a Goo Goo Dolls quote underneath and everyone will still worship you.

megan_fox_maxim_2.jpg megan_fox_maxim_3.jpg megan_fox_maxim_4.jpg more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button | comments comments (4) | send to a friend send to a friend

-------------

June 05, 2007

Transformers' Megan Fox: More Than Meets the Eye

megan-fox-gq-03.jpgFor far too long, this "sexy lady story" slot has been dominated by your Lohans, your Simpsons, your Spearses, and we figured the time was nigh to allow a fresh young upstart a chance at semi-popular internet blog stardom! Ladies and jellyspoons, feast your eyes on Megan Fox, star of the upcoming Transformers movie, a face sure to be ubiquitous in the future, undeniably fortunate of face and figure. The pics are from the latest issue of GQ:




megan-fox-gq-01.jpg megan-fox-gq-02.jpg megan-fox-gq-04.jpg

After you're done looking at the pictures, please note that she is engaged. To Brian Austin Green. That's right. Every night, David Silver straps on the #5 attachment to his Norelco, freshly carves out that George Michael snap-on beard and some Vanilla Ice eyebrow stripes, crawls on top of this woman, and does the worm to a Snow cassingle.
more »
AddThis Social Bookmark Button