filed under: Jaime Pressly

So we all know that Britney has raised Sean P and Jayden on a healthy American diet of KFC bowls, Lunchables, and secondhand Marlboro smoke. But My Name is Earl star Jaime Pressly comes in a close second when it comes to stuffing a child's maw full of inappropriate stuff. According to our personal barista, Female First:

She said: "My kid is really loud. He is just like 'MOMMY' all the time. And I'll be standing right next to him. He means no harm. He just wants a cup of Cuban coffee!"

Jaime also revealed her son's addiction is being encouraged by [her boyfriend] Cuban-born Eric Cubiche.

She added: "You think when Eric and Dezi are speaking to each other in Spanish they're mad, but they're really just saying, 'Hey, do you want to go get a cup of coffee?'"

The 31-year-old actress added she was surprised that Dezi didn't inherit his father's dark skin. She said: "Eric is very, very, very dark. He's Cuban with an olive complexion. Dezi came out looking like me. It's pretty crazy! Although he does tan really well!"

Ah, yes, nothing follows up a few shots of Cuban espresso quite like putting your infant in the sun for seven hours to achieve that deep, dark Hollywood glow. Of course, a sippy cup full of Diet Red Bull is a good way to keep that baby fat at bay while making sure your child has enough pep to get through a few rounds of Farmer in the Dell. It's in Dr. Spock, look it up. more »

• Megan Fox straps her camel toe into some stretch pants for a shopping excursion. (Faded Youth)

• And speaking of Megan Fox, her former(?) fiance Brian Austin Green denies the breakup rumors, says the couple are "solid". Solid as a rock? So nothing's changed it? And what you're saying is that the feeling's still hah hah hah hah hah hah hah hot? (PopCrunch)

• The first look at Jamie Lynn Spears's little baby, Maddie Briann. Maddie's next OK! cover: in thirteen years, when she marries cousin Sean Preston in a romantic toothless ceremony in Louisiana. (Dlisted)

• David Lee Roth choked on some nuts. (TMZ)

• Dane Cook is a shitty neighbor, literally. (Celebitchy)

• Robert Rodriguez traded his wife in for Rose McGowan, and is now trading Rose McGowan for Kat Dennings. Next up: he trades Kat Dennings for Abigail Breslin. (Defamer)

• Jennifer Lopez in a bikini. Post-twins, her abs are still flatter than yours, and her ass is still bigger than the sun. (Flisted)

• Lilo and SamRo ride the pink caterpillar at Disneyland. Ohhhh yeaaaaah. (Holy Taco)

• See Jaime Pressly in a bikini and you'll be nothin' but a horn dog. Eh? Yes? No? Bah. (IDLYITW)

• New Paris Hilton TV show in the works. And no, sadly, it's not a Fear Factor type show involving a rocket sending her to the surface of the moon to see how long she can hold her breath. (Hollywire)

• Hilary Duff knows that love is a battlefield and hell is for children; dons Benatar pants to prove it. (Hollywood Tuna)

• Bridget Moynahan is such a bitch, getting pregnant when she did so the baby's due date coincided with her then-boyfriend's future Brazilian supermodel girlfriend's birthday. How dare she? How dare she? (The Blemish)

• Kelly Clarkson snacks upon weed cookies. (Cityrag)

• Scary Spice is set to marry her new boyfriend, who has a "much bigger cock" than Eddie Murphy. Yeah, but IS he a much bigger cock than Eddie Murphy? Ho ho, we thought not. Wait, what? (Bossip)

• Being pregnant totally grossed out Jaime Pressly. Awesome, because her naming her son "Dezi" totally grossed us out. And now we're even. (Celebitchy)

• Dave Chappelle was hospitalized for "exhaustion". Because sitting on comically giant piles of money and not making any new shows really takes it out of a guy. (Bricks and Stones)

• Jon Lovitz wiped up a bar with Andy Dick's stupid face. We Lovitz! (Derek Hail)

• Winona Ryder blames shoplifting on drugs. Which would also explain her sexual coupling with Dave Pirner. (Celeb Warship)

• Kimberly Stewart's butt cheeks. That's right. Kimberly Stewart's butt cheeks. (Daily Stab)

Jaime Pressly has given birth to a baby boy, Dezi James, today. People mag reports:

Jaime has told PEOPLE the couple came up with their son's name as part of a running joke -- the Cuban-descended Cubiche, 33, does a Desi Arnaz impersonation, calling Pressly "Luuucy" when he comes home at night. James is her father's name (and hers).

Thank you, Jaime Pressly, for breaking the cycle of Jaydens and Avas amongst the offspring of the glitterati. Let's hope this is the ushering in of a bold new golden age in which Hollywood's best and brightest will be popping out little Gidgets, Beavers, and Squiggys. more »

My Name Is Earl costar Jaime Pressly is pregnant. You can tell by the way she is gently laying her hand upon her midsection. Years of reading US Weekly have taught us these useful ways to diagnose baby-up-the-gut. Jaime recently spoke to Redbook about the act of growing new life:

"These little saddlebags on the side of me right now - I've never had anything like that . . . And my boobs are completely out of control. When my milk comes in, I'm going to be able to feed a small village."

Man, everybody's jumping on the "celebrities save the world" bandwagon, Jaime. If only she'd revealed the news of her magical, village-nourishing snoobs earlier, Simon Cowell could have packed her up and shipped her off to Ghana with Bob Geldof to "give back". Why would Bob Geldof be there, you ask? Hair, baby. Beautiful, inspiring hair. more »

Normally when we link to pictures of celebrities naked in a magazine, the pictures fall into one of two categories: Playboy style (long in the tooth/career on the skids star/former child star with something to prove gets intense bikini wax, shows boobs) or Vanity Fair style (softly-lit, tasteful nude of popular star with legs crossed and arms draped languidly over bosom). After the cut, the pictures of Chloλ Sevigny et al fall into the second group, unfortunately, but there's a bright side! You can look at the pictures safely at work, seeing how there are no boobs and pubes and such and such. And if your boss is still outraged, you can say, "It's ART! Look! It's black and white and everything!" more »