filed under: Gillian Anderson

Naming your kid after a cartoon cat is generally not a good idea. But if you're set on that idea, we guess Felix is better than Garfield or Heathcliff (unless your last name is Huxtable, of course). But saddling your newborn with the moniker Felix when his older brother is already called Oscar? That's just cruel, lady. Reports People:

X-Files star Gillian Anderson and boyfriend Mark Griffiths are parents of a baby boy, the actress's rep tells PEOPLE exclusively.

Felix Griffiths, weighing 6 lbs., 15 oz., was born Oct. 15 in London, says rep Kelly Bush.

Felix is the second child for Anderson, 40, with Griffiths, joining their 1-year-old son Oscar. Anderson also has a 13-year-old daughter, Piper, from a previous marriage.

We have long chuckled over Pamela Anderson's sons Dylan and Brandon, but this is worse. When the Anderson-Lee kids grow up, they're only expected to engage in a mean sideburn showdown. But poor Felix Griffiths is forever going to be following older bro Oscar around with a tiny little broom, grumbling about the stink of cigar smoke. What a sad existence. But in a sick way we're hoping that this naming device will continue. Maybe Gillian could jump on Hollywood's latest trend and start popping out twins. Tom and Jerry. Hansel and Gretel. Harold and Kumar. And if she's lucky enough to get a set of triplets on her next uteral outing? Snap, Crackle, and Pop. more »

• Sophie Monk's nipples try to stab their way through her bikini top. Like they were pink, squishy pirate cutlasses. (I Don't Like You In That Way)

• David Duchovny was scared that wife Tea Leoni would give him a beatdown when she saw his makeout scene with Gillian Anderson in the X-Files movie. Guess we can assume she's never seen Californication. (FemaleFirst)

• Nick Hogan turns 18 on Sunday. That means big boy jail! Yayyy! Sooo big! (Allie Is Wired)

• Despite the pap songs, the fishbelly complexion, and the castrato voice, being James Blunt is kind of sweet. (Cityrag)

• More details about Batman giving his batmom a batshove. (Yeeeah!)

• Heather Locklear has been successfully rehabilitated. Locklear v. 2.0 ready for deployment. (The Blemish)

• Amy Winehouse wants at least five children with cracky, smacky husband Blake. Though since he's just been sentenced to 27 months in jail, that might be difficult outside of conjugal visits. (CelebWarship)

• Two weeks post-birth, and Nicole Kidman's gut is flatter than yours. The world is a vampire. (Hollywire)

• Gabrielle Reece shoves her volleyballs into a bikini top. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Picture it. 2008. Estelle Getty dies at her home. We'll miss you, Sophia Petrillo. (PopCrunch)

• Sienna Miller finally cuts loose her improbably-named, leonine lover Rhys Ifans. (CeleBuzz)

• Angry whelp Miley Cyrus wrecks equipment on the set of her new video. "Grrrr! I'm so mad! Like a bear! Grrr! Like a fluffy bear! With a bow around its neck! Grrr . . . awwww." (Drunken Stepfather)

• Kim Kardashian and Vanessa Minnillo dressed as cheerleaders, Carmen Electra in jazzercise gear. You're welcome, pre-verts. (The Hollywood Gossip)

• The fetus is out there. And by "there" we mean in Gillian Anderson's womb. (F-Listed)

• Oh yeah, Charlie Sheen married Brooke Whatsherguts last weekend. We didn't report on it because it didn't involve insulting Denise Richards. (Allie Is Wired)

• Lily Allen's hair is pink, her face is green, and her liver is pickled yellow. Fun drunk shots! Luv u Lily. (Derek Hail)

• Astley Tisdale: prepare for mass RickRollage. (The Blemish)

• Vanity Fair is in deep shit for implying that Gina Gershon let Bill Clinton's presidential peen into her Oval Office. Crystal Connors, NO! (Defamer)

• Eva Longoria is sporting what appears to be an inflated pregnancy rack, highlighted by the most burnt sienna of tan-spackle. (D-listed)

• Kirsten Dunst's teatlets meet a lace-paneled dress, peekaboo nippage ensues. The pictures are old, but so are you, geezer.

• John Mayer and Jessica Simpson are together again, naturally. Even though they say they weren't together in the first place. But they are now. Probably. Eh.

• Well, we had the dubious honor of viewing the Screech sex tape yesterday. What can we say about it? He refers to himself in the third person, as "the D Man", he is more interested in the various edibles the ladies have around their hotel room than their vaginas, and the first 15 minutes consist of Dustin and his lady in a bubble bath, discussing the finer points of 24. Fleshbot has their own review. And screencaps.

• Agent Scully had a baby! And despite her insistence that the child was sired by boyfriend Clyde Klotz, her ex-husband Julian Ozanne is demanding a paternity test. So we can find out it's half-alien. And then Mulder will watch porn and there will be sexual tension, etc.

• Australian Holly Valance's nipple boomerangs out of her swimsuit. Crikey!

• Keira Knightley is engaged to her actor arm candy Rupert Friend. Can you imagine calling up your parents and saying, "Mom, Dad, I am going to be Mrs. Rupert Friend"? And then your parents would howl with laughter and say, "Sure, and I'm about to marry Nigel Sparkleshowers! Ahahahaha! His best man will be Cecil Rhys-Babybunnybottom! Hahahahaha!"

• Penelope Cruz half naked for Pirelli. Why are you still reading this?

• Janet Jackson has made whoopee on a plane. In her seat. Surrounded by passengers. And peanuts. And crying babies. And manhandled issues of Flight magazine. And the heady stench of impeding fiery death. Anyone else have a boner right now?

• Will Smith says that he and Jada are homeschooling their children, because history and dates aren't important, and anything of consequence you need to know, like for example how to fly a space shuttle, can be found in books. So if you see a couple of confused children wandering around Hollywood, scratching their asses and crying because they don't know how to find bus fare or talk to non-Cruises, but do know how to commandeer a submarine, they would be the Smith progeny.

• Christie Brinkley's husband says sorry. "Sorry! Sorry for having sexy sex with a teenager. Seriously, sorry about that. My b."

• David Hasselhoff as Captain Hook in a London production of Peter Pan? Those are some pretty gay big shoes to fill. Only one man can replace The Hoff, and that's The Fonz. Ayyyyy.

• Paparazzi, please stop taking photographs of Natalie Portman. Or she will make her hair look like Annette Bening's circa 1989 and then waggle a hand at you in a vaguely threatening manner.

• Britney's little sister, Sean P Federline, and a turd on a stick. You heard us.

• I've had it with these motherfucking Mo'Niques on this motherfucking plane!

• Seacrest out? No. Lance Bass out? HELL YES! You go, girlfriend!

• Agent Scully is preggo . . . by an alien! No, by a businessman. Whatever.

• Carmen Electra, former wife of Dennis Rodman and newly split from Dave Navarro, was seen on a date with Jamie Foxx. Well, you know the old saying: once you go black, you go back once and then a few years later you look in the mirror and say "I'm married to a guy who still wears eyeliner and feather boas in 2006" and THEN you vow to never go back. Or something.

• Did Fergie get dumped? Get dumped get dumped get dumped? Check it out.

If life were an episode of The X Files, Fox Mulder would hear a report of a mystifying set of breasts and ass cheeks that mysteriously appeared like a beacon of sexiness in the Hollywood desert. And Scully would be all, "Preposterous! Mammary glands and the gluteous maximus simply do not just apparate unannounced." But then she'd experience some sort of close encouter with sex organs and be left in doubt.

Today, friends, life imitates televised art. And Gillian Anderson will, in fact, show her unidentified flying objects in an upcoming film. more »