filed under: Courtenay Semel

Lindsay Lohan enjoys wearing spandex blends that gently mold themselves to her labial folds, so it comes as no surprise that people who love vaginae would come sniffing around. We're speaking, of course, of lesbians. Famous lesbians. Samantha Ronson and Courtenay "My dad owns Yahoo" Semel are reportedly staging an epic battle to win the heart and fiery crotch of the Lohan. A source told Star:

"Sam and Courtenay fight for Lindsay's attention. Both have told her they love her."

Samantha reportedly kept in constant contact with Lohan even when she was in rehab through their MySpace page.

One of the love letters Lohan reportedly sent Samantha reads, "Your [sic] all I have to live for babe. I want to marry you and have children with you. I need you to live!"

However, Courtenay and Lohan were reportedly living together in the Hollywood Hills until the two had a fight. But Courtenay still "can't let go of Lindsay, and she'll do what she can to win her back."

What does a lesbian battle look like? We picture it to be a lot like Obi Wan Kenobi vs. Darth Vader, only with silicone G-Spotters instead of light sabers. And dental dams instead of Vader masks. And crotchless panties instead of capes and robes. And a canopy bed instead of outer space. So actually, it's nothing like Star Wars, but exactly like Clam Slam 8: The Deadliest Snatch. more »

We knew Lindsay couldn't kick the cooter. The girl has (hopefully, maybe, please?) given up the coke and the booze; she's gotta have one vice. And that vice is vadge. According to Page Six:

WE might not see Lindsay Lohan fall into anything serious with a guy anytime soon - sources say the starlet is investing most of her time in her new best friend, Courtenay Semel.

Last week, Lohan attended a holiday and housewarming party at the Los Angeles home of "Power Lesbian" Jeanette Longoria with Semel, the daughter of Yahoo! CEO Terry Semel, one partygoer told Page Six.

The spy at the sapphic soiree also overheard the duo refer to themselves as roommates, and one Hollywood insider claimed they've been living together in a house in LA for about a month.

"Lindsay came with Courtenay to the party around midnight and they stayed for an hour," said our spywitness. "The girls held hands and were with each other the whole time." The tipster added, "Every time I see Lindsay, there's Courtenay. They are always together."

Other insiders said that although the blond actress is still friends with her deejay pal Samantha Ronson - with whom Lohan has reportedly made out in the past - her friends say Lindsay has been spending most of her time recently with Semel.

A rep for Lohan told Page Six, "The two are good friends, nothing more."

Lindsay, of course, subscribes to the John Travolta definition of "good friends," which involves daily explorations of said friend's mouth with your tongue and sticking an occasional finger or two in her vagina.

Also, to kill those hot lesbo fantasies sprouting up in your brain, Courtenay doesn't look a thing like Angelina Jolie. She looks like this: