CelebNewsWire - The skinny. The scoop. The Hollywood poop. Wherever there is a nipple slip, we'll be there. If there's a party, you'll find us doing shots with Lindsay Lohan and upskirt flashing alongside Britney Spears. Wherever Paris Hilton is breaking the law, you'll see us. If there's a celebrity sex tape, we will find it. Nude stars, drunk stars, scandals, hookups, breakups? Let CelebNewsWire be your guide. Hold our hands. Come inside.

filed under: celebrity accidents

November 26, 2008

Kate Moss Viciously Attacked by Christmas Decorations

Kate_Moss_Jamie_Hince_Christmas_decorating_accident.jpg Kate Moss and boyfriend Jamie Hince have a wonderful explanation for why they're covered in cuts and bruises: it was all thanks to a "Christmas decoration accident." Thanks, guys. The next time we get caught up in a nasty domestic assault, when the cops show up we'll forgo the usual "I walked into a door" and tell the officers that we were just doing some lovely holiday decorating when there was an unfortunate accident. Brilliant. Take it away Daily Mail:
Kate Moss and boyfriend Jamie Hince played down some mysterious cuts and bruises saying it was a 'Christmas decoration accident.'

The supermodel arrived at the Christmas lights switch-on at Stella McCartney’s Mayfair shop on Monday with The Kills guitarist Hince, with scrapes down her cheek, while Hince was sporting a black eye.

But as eyebrows were raised among the other guests, they quashed any rumours by saying it was the result of a bizarre accident involving holly and baubles.

The injuries did not stop party girl Moss, 34,enjoying the bash.

A fellow guest said: 'Jamie and Kate couldn’t stop chuckling when people gingerly asked about their injuries.

'He said he was on a ladder and she was waiting at the bottom for him to pass down the boxes of decorations.

'But he lost his grip on one and heavy decorations landed on their heads.'
This is some serious shit right here. Obviously we are on the brink of an inanimate object uprising. Soon Kate's flat iron will clamp its hot little jaws around her wrist, and while she screams in pain, a box of safety pins will go right for her eyes while the blow dryer wraps its cord around her neck. And after the toilet becomes Kate's master, no one will be safe. more »
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October 22, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Charlize, Pleez

charlize_theron_butt.jpeg• I see London, I see Iraq. I see Charlize Theron's ass crack. (The Nip Slip)

• Mary-Kate Olsen gets in an accident with an El Pollo Loco truck. Oh, sweet irony. (Drunken Stepfather)

• Guy Ritchie wastes no time--he's allegedly hooking up with actress Kelly Reilly, who has red hair and almost certainly does not resemble gristle. (Celebitchy)

• Britney Spears debuts some dance moves, gives us a teasing slice of midriff. Oh, you little minx. (Cityrag)

• WAG Amanda Carraway will get seedy for Playboy. Get it? Seed? Ha ha ha? Yes? (Hollywire)

• Kim Kardashian gives boyfriend Reggie Bush some TLC in the hospital. TLC meaning Titanic Leviathan Can. (Bitten and Bound)

• Former Atomic Kitten and present UK reality harlot Kerry Katona is very sober and articulate in a new interview. (The Blemish)

• This one time, Alyson Hannigan stuck a flute up her pussy. And the flute got her pregnant! Mazel tov. (Pop on the Pop)

• Nick Hogan's out of jail! Christ, we're SO EXCITED! Nick Hogan RULES! HE RULES!!!! (Derek Hail)
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October 10, 2008

Mickey Rourke: What a Cut-Up

mickeyscary.jpgCharlize Theron got ugly for Monster and got an Oscar. Nicole Kidman wore a fake nose for The Hours and got an Oscar. Jared Leto got real fat for Chapter 27 and got gout. Mickey Rourke is now following suit with some extreme acting in order to land him an award (or possibly a buildup of uric acid in the blood leading to crippling joint pain). Report our buddies at TMZ:
On the set of his latest film "The Wrestler," Mickey Rourke went all Method and taped a blade to his forearm. "When the time was right," co-star Wass Stevens tells the New York Post, "[he] sliced his forehead." And Mick apparently hurt himself – he says he had three MRIs before the end of filming.

Rourke is getting serious Oscar buzz for the performance.
That sounds pretty extreme, but having blades slice into the mottled flesh of the face is not really anything out of the ordinary for Mickey Rourke. He usually refers to it as "Wednesday".
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October 08, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: Minnillo Licks the Vanillo

vanessa_minnillo_eating_pinkberry_sexy.jpg• Vanessa Minnillo fellates a PInkberry spoon. (F-listed)

• Can't lose that last stubborn five pounds? Get gastric band surgery! Courtney Love did. (Yeeeah!)

• Pics from Britney Spears's new video for "Womanizer". Lots o' wigs, and not a batty pink one amongst them. (Pop on the Pop)

• Madonna bans Sarah Palin from attending her shows. Because Sarah Palin is a really huge fan of Breathless Mahoney and the video for "Justify My Love". (Daily Stab)

• Miley Cyrus makes out with Minnie Mouse. Because that's just how she rolls, man. (Drunken Stepfather)

• David Duchovny and his heat-seeking wang released back onto an unsuspecting pubic. Public. (IDLYITW)

• Lauren Bacall calls Tom Cruise "vulgar", "sick", "ridiculous", and "a maniac". You forgot "short", Betty. (Exposay)

• Nick Nolte's house burned down, and NO, it wasn't because he dropped a doob onto the bed, jerk. (PopCrunch)

• Pete Doherty wants to perform in a rat-filled coffin. When asked for comment, rats said, "Ew, disgusting." (NME)

• A party at the Playboy Mansion inspires Anna Faris to greater heights of promiscuity. (Mr. Skin)

• Forgetting Sarah Marshall. But not forgetting the nipple patches. Damn you, Kristen Bell. (Don't Link This)

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September 22, 2008

The Tattoo Guy from Blink-182 and the DJ Will Be OK

barker_dj_am_crash.jpgWe hate it when celebrities get hurt or sick or killed. We're not compassionate; we just feel uncomfortable leaving our cozy cocoon of sarcasm and hate. So it is with great squirminess and unease that we have to update you on Saturday's plane crash that killed four people and severely injured DJ AM and Travis Barker. According to US Weekly, the pair are doing well and expected to recover nicely:
Travis Barker and DJ AM suffered second and third degree burns from Friday’s jet crash that killed four people, Dr. Fred Mullins, Medical Director at Georgia’s Joseph Still Burn Center, announced at a press conference Sunday morning.

Barker has burns on his torso and lower body and Goldstein has burns on his arm and part of his head, Mullins said. (Mullins would not say the percentage of their bodies that were burned or whether they were conscious. He also did not go into detail about the type of treatment they are currently receiving.)

He said the two did not sustain any other injuries from the crash.

“I think these patients are going to make a full recovery,” Mullins said. “Anybody who can survive a plane crash is very lucky.”

During the conference, Mullins also read a statement from the families: “The families wish to thank fans from all over the world for their prayers and concern. Deepest sympathy is expressed to the loved ones of those who perished in the crash. As the two recuperate and mourn this loss, privacy for them, their families and friends is requested at this time.”
Life is truly unfair. Like it wasn't bad enough that Barker and AM once had to dip their dongs into Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie (respectively)! And now this.
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July 29, 2008

Did Shia Slip Grenier's Girl La Beef?

adrian_grenier_isabel_lucasjpg.jpgLike the prince desperately searching to find the maiden who fits the glass slipper, people have been scouring Los Angeles to figure out who the female passenger in Shia the Beef's Flaming Beertastic F-150 of Death was. Nothing was known of the lady other than the fact that she yelled "FUCK!" after the truck went tumbling, but today, she has been identified! Her name is Isabel Lucas, she's Beef's Transformers 2 costar, and she's Adrian Grenier's girlfriend. Whoops. New York Daily News reports:
Shia LaBeouf may have more to worry about than the drunken- driving charge he got after crashing his truck with Australian hottie Isabel Lucas strapped in the passenger seat.

Lucas, one of LaBeouf's comely co-stars in the upcoming "Transformers" sequel, has been dating actor Adrian Grenier for months.

[Grenier] was testy and had no comment Monday when asked how Lucas was feeling after the smashup with her other leading man.

Lucas, 23, was in LaBeouf’s car when it collided with another vehicle at a West Hollywood intersection early Sunday morning and rolled. She was treated for minor bumps and bruises at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center and released.

“She was in the car….They’re friends,” a movie source said of the LaBeouf-Lucas connection. The source said the two have been working a lot of late nights on the set and most likely were together to let off some professional steam.
Generally, when a man finds out that his special lady has been stepping out with a drunk dude, he'd issue a hearty beatdown punctuated by a few kicks to the groin, so under normal circumstances, we'd tell Shia to go secret himself away in a bunker or something. But it's Adrian Grenier. What's he gonna do? Break out the pomade and style Shia to death?
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July 28, 2008

Shia LaBeouf Spreads Beefy Goodness All Over La Brea

shia_lebeouf_stoned.jpgShia "The Beef" LaBeouf decided to step up his normal routine of getting arrested for loitering and getting arrested for public smoking. And he did so by getting arrested after getting sloshed and rolling his truck at 3 A.M. today in Hollywood. He apparently made a left turn in front of another car, causing a major collision. The Beef will be charged with a misdemeanor DUI and is currently having surgery on his hand. His people released the following statement to TMZ:
"Attorneys for Mr. LaBeouf confirm that an automobile accident involving an additional party occurred early morning in Los Angeles on July 27, 2008. Shia is currently recovering from extensive hand surgery with plans to return to work on the set of 'Transformers 2' within one month. No further comment will be issued at this time."
And then the wrecked truck transformed into a giant robot and he and Shia sparked a doob and hung out at Walgreens. By Michael Bay.
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May 14, 2008

CNW Junk Drawer: "If I Was Cyclops and You Were Jean Grey"

ryan_mandy_moore_comic.jpg• Singer/asshole Ryan Adams goes to comic shop expressly for the purpose of fondling Mandy Moore. Nerds everywhere cut selves. (The Blemish)

• Tara Reid works a bikini, haters be damned. (Drunken Stepfather)

• It's entirely possible that Tony Romo will never fumble with Jessica Simpson's footballs again. (Yeeeah!)

• Celebrity Muppets. (Cityrag)

• Kelly Brook is back together with your friend Billy Zane. (F-listed)

• Lily Allen once sang that she wanted to see you smile. Today, the dream becomes reality as shots of her cliff-diving topless emerge. (Hollywood Tuna)

• Some skintage flesh! Tricia Helfer nip slip circa 2007. Battlestar Galac-tit-ca. (Fatback)

• The new cast of 90210 revealed! That one was for all of our under 12 and gay readers. (Bitten and Bound)

• How I Met My Emo Lover, by Flashlee Simpson. (FemaleFirst)

• Another kind of "bump" for Britney. (Daily Stab)

• Shia La Beef on La Zit Cream. (Celebitchy)

• When scabies met impetigo: a tender love story featuring Amy Winehouse and Pete Doherty. (Seriously OMG WTF)

• Amy Smart has a well-padded poon. (Taxi Driver)

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April 14, 2008

Britney Spears Caught in (Vehicular) Pile-up

britney spears sleeps in her car.jpg You would think that with all that time Britney Spears spends locked up in her bedroom with nothing to do but dress up her doggies, she wouldn't feel the need to multitask. But you'd be wrong. Girl still thinks that her Benz is the perfect place to put on Fabulash. It must have excellent lighting. TMZ reports:
Minutes before Britney Spears caused a three car crash on a Saturday night, she was driving the same way most women in L.A. do -- putting on her makeup behind the wheel!

TMZ spoke with the guy she hit, who says before the accident, he was admiring the white Mercedes and the woman putting on makeup while driving it. It wasn't until after she hit him at an estimated 10-15 MPH that he realized the woman was Britney. The man also says he wasn't sure if she was still putting on makeup at the time of the crash.

After the smash up, Britney's bodyguard apologized for the incident, but Britney never got around to doing the same. Brit and the 21-year-old crashee only exchanged a few words, but she did mention she was on the way to dinner with her mom.

As far as the field sobriety test is concerned, the crashee says officers performed the ol' "follow my finger test" on Brit. At first she was giggly, but she got real serious real quick. BTW -- she was the only person involved who was tested. CHP claims the test was S.O.P. telling us, "We do a standard check on most drivers .... especially during those hours."

While no injuries were reported on the scene, the man claims that he woke up with a sore back this morning and is looking into booking an appointment with a chiropractor.
Is it just us, or were you too hoping for something a bit more titillating when you read the words "Britney Spears" and "pile-up"? more »
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November 02, 2007

Britney Spears Ran Over a Cop's Foot

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October 19, 2007

Britney Spears: Foot Squisher

britney spears licks dog.jpg We have tried to sever our ties with Ms. Britney Jean Spears. She just takes and takes and takes until we are dry. Only Peter Cetera knows our pain; Britney truly is a hard habit to break. So she will continue to do stuff, and we will continue to talk about it. more »
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October 16, 2007

Britney Turns Self In; Desires Sweat Lodge

brit_cleavage.jpgYesterday was Britney-free, but those days are over, chump. Suck on this: back in August, Britney sideswiped some dude's car and then sped off, germ-bearded dog in tow. Now the cops want her chewy ass, and she turned herself in last night. Mug shot TK! Reports Yahoo News:
Officer Mike Lopez said Spears turned herself in around 9 p.m. and left about 45 minutes later. Spears was fingerprinted and photographed, he said.

Spears, 25, was wearing large designer sunglasses and a black turtleneck dress and jacket. As she left the station, she told KCAL-TV that all went smoothly.

"They were nice," she said of police. She told the station she was wearing the sunglasses because she had pinkeye.

"She was fine, cooperative," Officer Lopez said. "She did her business and came out."
He means that literally. She walked into the police station, hiked her sack dress above her stubbly, panty-free lady chalupa, squatted, and crapped on the floor.

After the cut, read about how B-spizzy plans on turning her life around. more »
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October 12, 2007

"Orrrrrly! Get Out of the Cahhhhhh!"

Orlando_Bloom_001.jpgFender benders and car-bound semi-fisticuffs aren't just confined to Britney, Paris, and other Hollywood ladies, they can also strike such masculine hunkasauri as Orlando Bloom. The curiously smooth Brit (not this one) got into a little crash outside of an L.A. nightspot last night, but what was really entertaining is the fight that went down minutes before, which was conveniently caught with grace and ease by the paparazzi. We don't know why the other guy in the car looks so distressed. It's Orlando Bloom. All he has to do is give him a gentle, limpwristed slap on the shoulder and he'll fall down in agony. Or say "Boo! I am a bad scary monster! I'm gonna gitchoo! I'm gonna gitchoo!" while tickling him. Or take away his Kerastase Bain Satin Extra-Moisturizing conditioner and watch him wither away, clutching his bronze curls and moaning.
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September 24, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: What's Red, White, and Screwed All Over?

nicole_richie_pregnant_1.jpg• Nicole Richie in a bikini. Now with more boobs and fetus; less jutting latissimus dorsi. (Egotastic!)

• Drummer gets pounded: Meg White sex tape? We say not her, but here's a challenge: if someone can find and send us a picture of Meg wearing the "D" necklace featured in the hump flick, we will believe. (Derek Hail)

• George Clooney suffering from road rash. "Road rash" to become the new "exhaustion". (A Socialite's Life)

• Salma Hayek laid her hot bod down, spread her sexy thighs wide, and . . . pooped out a squalling baby. Mazel tov! (Yeeeah!)

• So now Marcia didn't finger Jan? What a rip! (Dlisted)

• Here are things Lindsay Lohan has destroyed: countless bottles of Grey Goose, cars, her own career, and now, some dude's marriage. (IMDb)

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August 27, 2007

Jennifer's Anuston, Almost

Jennifer_Aniston_Bikini1.jpgReporting on Hulk Hogan's son Nick being seriously injured in a car accident is probably the right thing to do, since it's big news in Gossiptown today. But when have we ever had any sort of journalistic integrity? Do you refer to us as "Celeb 'Scoop' Newswire"? You don't. Do you see a paper with "press" stuck in our fedora? You don't. Our business is show business, baby, and showbiz ain't drag racing in Florida with the Hulkster's progeny. Besides, Nick is going to be OK--or, as OK as someone can be with a mahogany-colored dad. Godspeed, Nick Hogan, we toast your recovery with these shots of Jennifer Aniston in a groin-sweatingly skimpy bikini, coming dang near close to flashing her clam cleave. Look upon these images and be revived. Come away from the light. You too, Owen Wilson.

Jennifer_Aniston_Bikini2.jpg Jennifer_Aniston_Bikini3.jpg Jennifer_Aniston_Bikini4.jpg
more »
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"Don't You Know I'm Loco?"

owen_wilson_hansel.jpgYesterday afternoon, the Butterscotch Stallion half-heartedly tossed his mane of champagne ringlets, gave a pained whinny, and attempted to canter off to that stable in the sky. TMZ reports:
Santa Monica Police issued the following statement to TMZ: "On Sunday Aug. 26. 2007 at 12:10 PM, officers from the Santa Monica Police Department responded to a medical assistance call from the Santa Monica Fire Department at the 900 block of 23rd Street. The person was transported to a local hospital where they are being treated."
And Star has this to say:
Actor Owen Wilson was hospitalized after attempting suicide. Sources tell the ENQUIRER and Star that he sliced his left wrists and took an indeterminate amount of pills. Police and an ambulance responded to a 911 call from Owen’s house around noon on Sunday. His wrist was sutured and bandaged at the hospital. The ENQUIRER and Star broke the story of Owen’s hospitalization earlier Sunday and revealed that he was being transferred from St. John’s after being stabilized. The publications learned that he was going to be detoxed.
Perhaps the shock of realizing that he had been replaced by a dillrod named DAX who was in Employee of the Month had finally set in. Or maybe he had been listening to Judas Priest's Stained Class backwards.

Ugh, trying to make a possible suicide attempt funny is making us feel like the biggest creeps in Creeptown. Sorry. Feel better soon, Owen Wilson, you handsome, charming weirdo.
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August 08, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: All Upskirts and Boobs Edition

rose_mcgowan_oof.jpg• Robert Rodriguez is awfully proud of dating Rose McGowan's nipples. (Hollywood Tuna)

• Still puttin' the "ghey" in "McConaughey", Matty M is laying some serious pipe in those Old Navy cargo shorts. (Allie Is Wired)

• Charlize Theron ain't gonna let a little thing like her beans get in the way of donning a bikini. (The Blemish)

• Gwen Stefani is afraid that her son is going to bite her tits clean off. (FemaleFirst)

• Britney sideswiped some dude's car, and then popped a squat to survey the damage. But the real damage is her to'-up upskirt view. Ooooh, high five, girlfriends! So bitchy! (Drunken Stepfather)

• If that ain't enough for you, here's some Britney pantaloons. (Cityrag)

• The beautiful Lauryn Hill is bringing Skidz back, at long last! (Socialite's Life)

• Denise Richards and Chuckles Sheen: still in hate. Story now with 100% more semen. (Celebitchy)

• Mischa Barton (remember her?) dyes hair; eats food. (Celeb Warship)

• Eva Herzigova shows what's Herzigunda her dress. (Taxi Driver)

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August 07, 2007

Britney Does Stuff, We Talk About It

britney gets pouty.jpg We are frankly getting a little bit tired of following the minutia of the life of Britney Spears. We can recreate every outfit she wore in the month of July in watercolor form, complete with a helpful stain guide that gives us a fairly accurate idea of what went into her mouth while she donned each ensemble. But it's a slow gossip day, and the masses they love Brit Brit like Pete Doherty loves a pipe, so we must press on. In today's installment, Brit has a fender bender, hires a new manager, and helps out the hair and makeup folks at Allure by removing her shirt. It does get in the way of the weavedryer. more »
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June 29, 2007

Lindy Loho Was Loco on Coco!

lindsay-lohan-drunk.jpgRemember right before Lindsay Lohan went to rehab? And she crashed her car into a tree? And she was all passed out? OK, so this is kind of weird, some might even call it "crazy" or something, but--get this--as it turns out, she was drunk and high on blow at the time! We know! It's so weird! We were like, "wait, whaaaaa? Back da funk UP, yo," when we heard but w/e, dudes. TMZ scoops it:
According to multiple law enforcement sources, toxicology reports conclude that Lohan, 20, had "nearly twice the legal limit" of alcohol and traces of blow in her bloodstream when she crashed her 2005 Mercedes SL-65 convertible into a curb on Sunset Blvd. around 5:30 AM on May 26. In California, drivers with a .08 or higher are legally drunk.

Police tell TMZ Lohan and two other adults were in the car at the time of the accident. After the crash, she was taken to a local hospital and treated for minor injuries, then placed under arrest on suspicion of DUI. Cops later said they found a "usable amount" of cocaine in the car.

We're told that the Beverly Hills Police Dept. could present the case to the Los Angeles D.A. in the next few days.

Lohan's lawyer, Blair Berk, told TMZ, "It's highly inappropriate for me to discuss a pending case." Berk added, "It is extremely unprofessional for law enforcement to do it."
Well, we suppose it's a good thing that she's in rehab after all, then. Because this whole time we've been like, "God, that poor thing. Falsely accused! Being forced to weave lanyards and play trust-building exercises with tweakers when she's simply an innocent, at the wrong place at the wrong time!" Like O.J. more »
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May 29, 2007

Firecrotch crash!

llugh.jpgA general debaucherous Memorial Day weekend for you consists of hitting a record two BBQs, having one too many Genny Cream Ales, falling asleep in the sun, procuring 2nd degree burns, and making a trip to the hospital for heavy-duty aloe and zinc application. Admittedly, you look pretty badass with all those blisters, and the prospect of peeling your back skin off in solid sheets is enough to make you pretty popular with the kids for the next few weeks, but sorry, Lindsay Lohan has you beat. She spent the weekend partying until 5:30 A.M., crashing her car into a tree, fleeing the scene, getting busted for cocaine, going out and getting blindlingly zorked to celebrate, puking, passing out in a car, and then checking into rehab. Man, she's really taking Charles Nelson Reilly's death pretty hard. more »
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May 22, 2007

Paula Abdul Fall Down Go Boom on Nose

pauladog.jpgPaula Abdul, whose people assure us does not have a neurological disorder, brain affliction, pill problem, or particular liking of alcoholic beverages, continued to prove this by taking a tumble in her home and breaking her nose on Saturday. Paula told Extra:
"I took a nasty fall trying not to hurt my dog. I bruised myself on my arm, my chest, my waist all the way down to my hip. All from my little chubby Tulip. Tulip has no remorse. She just stared at me."
Her rep, David Brokaw stated:
"Paula went to the doctor and she did break her nose, but she's moving on and doing great. She looks terrific. If you didn't know she broke her nose, you'd never guess anything happened to her. She is in pain. No question about that. But you'd never know anything happened to her. There are no bandages. She's got some bruises on her."
What a puzzling scene. Paula, not drunk or otherwise unstable, mentally or physically, was trying to maneuver around a 3 lb. dog and ended up breaking her face open? What a treacherous home life she leads, with soft, wiggly pets strewn about like land mines--a real-life game of Frogger, in which you're playing with fire and your nose is on the line. From Coleco. more »
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April 27, 2007

Lindsay Lohan's Driver Hit Me (And It Felt Like a Kiss)

lohaneyekiss.jpgLindsay Lohan and cars don't mix, much like Victoria Beckham and nutrition. After upwards of 4 or 5 fender benders, she hired a driver, John Zagata, who apparently has even cruddier automotive skills than she. On Wednesday, he plowed into a car driven by Tony Bennett's daughter, Antonia. IDLYITW reports, via Page Six:
John Zagata "was hostile with me. He ran into me, then got out of his car and started yelling at me," singer Antonia Bennett told Page Six...Zagata was waiting to pick up Lohan in the parking lot of the Rehearsals.com recording studio in Burbank and talking on his cellphone when "he hit Antonia's car. Then he has the nerve to jump out and scream, 'Don't you know who I am? I represent Lindsay Lohan! How dare you get in my way!' He had no idea who Antonia was." Morgan said that Zagata tried to blame Antonia "but [that] there were six witnesses, including the security guard who saw him ram her." He said that Antonia was shaken up and that her car suffered close to $2,000 in damages. Zagata did not return our call."
Hahaha. "How DARE you! Do you know who I am? I'm a guy who Lindsay Lohan's personal assistant called after seeing my hand-lettered 'DRIVER CHEAP I WILL WORK GOOD' sign off the Slawson freeway exit!" "Don't you know who I am? My dad sang Fly Me to the fuckin' Moon!" And then Larry Birkhead's cousin and Eva Longoria's dry cleaner showed up and they all linked arms and did Rockette kicks while the backdrop changed to the South Pacific and the chorus entered to sing the coda. Coming soon to a stage near you.
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March 20, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: "Why Don't You Fuck Your Whole Movie?"

8big_jan.jpg• Lily Tomlin thinks David O. Russell is a "motherfucker". David O. Russell thinks Lily Tomlin is a "cunt" and a "bitch". They Hate Huckabees! Two awesomely NSFW clips here. If you only watch one video of a comedienne and an overrated director trading cruel barbs and throwing set dressing around this year, make it this one.

• YO, Samantuh! Ay oh, oh ay, you're showin' some cleave!

• Vince Vaughn: now 87% more bloated and stinky and crazy!

• Shanna and Travis. Reuinted and it feels so good. Together again, naturally. Baby, just one more try. And so forth and so on.

• Tara Reid eschews bra, trots out those Frankenteats yet again.

• Leonardo DiCaprio held peace talks with Israel's Vice Premier. Because if anyone can stop the fighting with Palestine, it's the homeless kid from Growing Pains.

• Paris and Jenna Jameson compare Fraggle weaves; vaginal chancres.

• We once made fun of Rose McGowan's strange new face. As it turns out, she almost lost her eye in an accident. Yarrr!

• The secret diaries of Anna Nicole are up for auction. "Deer diery. today i waked up and i eated some pasghetti. then i layd down on my can a pee bed and take a nap. then it was time for diner then i had sex with some gies. xoxox"

• Heigl kinda sounds like heinie.

• Salma Hayek sports the Ugly Betty/Love Story hybrid maternity look.

• The Dunst just Razorlights up a room, doesn't she?
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March 14, 2007

CNW Junk Drawer: Welcome to the World, Liam Aaron McDermott

toribaby.jpg•