About once every three months or so Nicky Hilton begs big sis Paris to lie low for a couple days, go for a series of colonics at that nice spa in Palm Springs or fall off a table while she's dancing so she has to have a bit of bed rest, so that Nicky can nab a little piece of the Hilton press pie, in order to sell Tweety-bird themed clothing or a hotel or cowboy hats with Nicky spelled out in rhinestones or some such crap. This time around Nick's using her Paris-free day for a little break-up publicity.  

Revelling in other people's misfortune is our métier, and revelling in the misfortune of the undeservedly wealthy and egregiously vile is our specialty-within-our-specialty. So today has been a particularly happy day around the CNW offices after hearing about Kevin Connolly repeatedly slugging bloated moneybags Brandon Davis last week. Nothing like a ninny getting his just desserts. And if there's anything Brandon Davis loves, it's desserts!  

An Entourage cast member got uppity at a club recently and started a fight with the DJ. We know what you're thinking, and, nope, it wasn't Piven. It wasn't Adrian Grenier or Matt Dillon's brother either. Turtle? He's got some heft. Nope? God, then who's left? Mandy Moore? It has to be Mandy Moore. Wait, you're saying it was Kevin Connolly? Eric? He looks like he couldn't even take Jermaine Dupri or a really quick-witted Ewok. Yeah, we know that last sentence was a bit redundant, but we couldn't think of another thing that was really really small and scrappy.