Awkward English hobbit and Canadian Jesus freak with brutal abs meet on set of Hawaiian plane crash show, fall in love, dry hump on beach. Only in Hollywood.



Please let that tattoo say "You all everybody."  

• Teri Hatcher deems her toes and nipples "suck-worthy". Just like her acting!

• Evangeline Lilly blames Hollywood for forcing her to get really, really buff.

• IF you want Rod Stewart's daughter's naked bo-dy, AND you think she's sex-y, COME on sugar, click right here.

• Ashlee Simpson begins her slow, painful metamorphosis into her sister. First, the nose. Then comes the Jackass copulating.

• Anna Nicole Smith climbed on top of an 89-year-old man, placed his shriveled, liver spotted member into her person, and is probably getting a billion dollars for the trouble. Now, possibly some dude has mounted Anna Nicole's shriveled, Trimspa-ravaged body, placed his member inside her person, impregnated her, and wants the ca$h. Ah, the circle of life.

• Dunstcrack! Dunstcrack! Dunstcrack! Dunstcrack!!!

• Eva Longoria talks about getting naked or doing it or something like that. In related news, bear shits in woods, Pope wears funny hat, etc. etc.

• Denise Richards tries to shake off the shit-stink of husbandstealing assholism, turning the tables on Heather Locklear, saying, "Heather knows why we aren’t friends.” Which sounds suspiciously like the now-classic "Nicole knows what she did."

 

Tinseltown time seems to have come to a standstill in the wake of the Tom Thumb and K-Hole birthing news. Paris Hilton has stopped flashing her yams, Britney hasn't thrown little Sean out of a moving vehicle or substituted his formula with Windex, Eva Longoria hasn't spoken about . . . anything. We need to fill up some space and, having nothing to talk about and this being Lost night and all, here is a picture of Evangeline Lilly dressed as the Easter Bunny.



Nice ass, Freckles.  

Frankly, she looks kind of silly.

 

Evangeline Lilly is Evangeli-cal . . . about not going nude! LOL! LOL! Ahahahahah!!!!!!! Cuz, like, like, like, evangelical! That's like her name! Ahaaaaahaha! Ahaha! Ha! Ha. Ha.  

First we're gonna make you think about Evangeline Lilly's panties. We'll wait for a minute while you ponder. Now we're going to ruin that fantasy by telling you that she may soon be betrothed to a hobbit. What, like you would have been a better choice?  

We’re a little late to the hoe-down on Lost, as last year we received the first season of Too Close for Comfort for our birthday and spent the better part of seven months hypnotized by Jim J. Bullock. But we’ve recently started catching up with everyone’s favorite plane crashees and have started a mild obsession with Evangeline Lilly. We rock ourselves to sleep at night by repeating her name over and over again. But that might change now that she’s overshared details about her bodily functions.