We warned you, Kate Hudson, but you just wouldn’t listen. Let this be a lesson to future scissors-averse starlets: If you allow your son’s hair to grow to Cornsilk Cabbage Patch Kid Becky LaRue lengths, you will end up in divorce court. It’s simple cause and effect, people.
We don’t know the reason behind Kate Hudson and Chris Robinson’s separation, and frankly we don’t really care. All we know is that “She Talks to Angels” is going to the predominate sound in our head all day, and for that someone must pay. So when you hear of a mysterious figure with a beard that weighs more than his body strangling record-store patrons with a long, patterned scarf, don’t turn us in right away. Give us a chance to flee to a Utopian land yet unsullied by anyone shaking their money maker.
Anyway, on with the details. Wait, there are no details. People reports that the couple is splitting after six years of marriage. There is no word from the couple’s reps at this time. Wow. Exciting stuff. So in lieu of a fancy credibility-enhancing quote here, we’ll just point out that Kate was in a movie called Le Divorce. This of course signals to us that Kate’s life from here on in will be comprised solely of her acting roles taking real-life form. Next we will expect her to get trapped in a miserable relationship with Matthew McConaughey and try to get him to dump her by withholding sex. Yeah, good luck with that one, Kate.
Kate: Free from Chris and free from her top at MrSkin.com.
