Winona Ryder Goes Green

These days, Winona Ryder is mainly known for two things. Stealing stuff, and granting any guy with a guitar an all-access laminate into her musky and moist backstage area. But the latter fact may soon be history, as it sounds like she’s traded musicians for irritating chinless dudes from the ’90s. According to our personal gossip holy man, Female First:

Winona Ryder is reportedly dating comedian Tom Green.

The ‘A Scanner Darkly’ actress, who is said to have split from Rilo Kiley rocker Blake Sennett just a few weeks ago, was seen cuddling Tom in Hollywood’s Crown Bar last week.

Friends claim Winona is already smitten with the Canadian funnyman after the pair hit it off on their date. A source said: “Winona didn’t waste any time. She and Tom were all over each other, laughing and carrying on.”

We’re sick of seeing actresses with emo weenies like Pete Wentz and the brothers Madden, so we welcome a new trend of actresses dating washed-up MTV stars from last decade. Miley Cyrus and Jesse Camp would make a nice match. So would Jennifer Aniston and Simon Rex. But we’re more enraptured with the idea of Tom Green saying “Winnie would you like some sausage?” to Winona during foreplay.

Wanna ride ‘er? See Winona Ryder NAKED at MrSkin.com.