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Whitney Houston Wrangles Boobs After Daring Escape Attempt

g x factor 181009 e2Whitney Houston is back! She’s got a new album, a new Oprah interview, and she’s done sucking the glass wiener. Wait, scratch that. America’s most beloved dootie bubble factory performed last night on the Simon Cowell talent show X Factor. And her tits nearly popped out of her dress while she sounded like your cousin Debbie after smoking a half pack of pilfered Pall Malls and huffing Wite-Out under the bleachers. For the first time, we can say “Hell, WE can sing better than Whitney Houston” and mean it. And that’s saying something, because we’re a website. We don’t even have a larynx.

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2 Comments

  1. Posted October 19, 2009 at 4:05 pm | Permalink

    Yep, sometimes it’s just best for some music legends just to fade away and not make a comeback. Ms. Houston should’ve just retired or something. This is just sad to watch.

  2. Jake
    Posted October 25, 2009 at 7:09 pm | Permalink

    Nothing was wrong with that performance. She sounded better than some these no talent lip syncing singers.

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