The Hollywood Poop

Singers Need Stuff: A VMA Rider Compendium

aguilera_vma_awards_mtv_boobs.jpgToday we read a list of stars' rider demands for the VMAs and wondered: what, exactly, would happen if Kid Rock's yogurts were full fat? What would go down if Christina Aguilera's candles were presented with a lighter instead of a pack of matches? Would these singers be thrown into a tailspin and rendered unable to perform? Would they wither and die like hothouse flowers? Here's In Touch Weekly's list (via Celebitchy) of who needed what at the VMAs:

Christina Aguilera
- 1 large boom box that plays CDs, no alarm clock stereos
- 1 full length mirror
- 1 space heater
- 1 table just for makeup and dressing
- 2 bottles of Veuve Clicquot champagne
- 3 LíOccitane vanilla-scented candles with matches
- 1 cozy blanket
- 4 black bath towels
- 1 case of Arrowhead water

Rihanna
- 1 lighted professional makeup mirror
- 2 Trish McEvoy blueberry candles
- 1 large, comfy sofa
- 24 Buffalo wings, hot sauce on the side
- 1 whole roasted chicken, spiced with jerk seasoning and cut into parts

Kid Rock
- 1 toaster
- 1 tube of ChapStick
- 1 pack of white crew socks
- 2 bottles of Grey Goose or Ketel One vodka
- 2 low fat yogurts (raspberry)
- 1 package of baby wipes

Jonas Brothers
- 8 Red Bull Sugarfree beverages, plus 6 regular Red Bulls
- 2 plastic bottles of room-temperature apple juice
- 12 bath-size towels (must be freshly laundered)
- 24 pieces of California sushi rolls
- 1 package of Oreo Double Stuff
- 6 bottles Vitaminwater (yellow, red, orange)
- 3 packages of Listerine Pocket-packs breath strips

They say you can learn a lot about a person by how they dress or how they treat their mother. We think you can learn more about a person by what they have on their rider. For example, we now know that Rihanna is cool and has great taste in food. And that Christina Aguilera needs to set a mood before she performs. And that the Jonas Brothers' rider was most likely manufactured by their publicist in a bid to seem as wholesome as their image (apple juice and Oreos? Come on) , when in reality they probably demanded German scat porn and some speedballs. And that Kid Rock has chapped lips and a dirty anus. And enjoys Eggos.

You can has Christina Aguilera nude at MrSkin.com.

Share This:

Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post. Trackbacks are closed, but you can post a comment.

One Comment

  1. anthony
    Posted September 29, 2008 at 1:34 pm | Permalink

    german scat porn….LOL.

Post a Comment

Your email is never published nor shared. Required fields are marked *

*
*

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

© CelebNewsWire.com 2004-2010