Vanessa Minnillo: Lindsay Lohan's Secret Knife-Play Buddy

Yesterday when you saw those pictures of Lindsay Lohan playing with a knife and her anonymous friend trying to free Lindsay's jug from its spandexy prison, you thought, "Gee, Lindsay's friend sure is helpful. I wish she would've pulled a little harder though." Well, turns out Lindsay's friend is Vanessa Minnillo. And welcome to the two seconds in which Hollywood's most bland pseudo-famous person seems almost, sorta, still not really interesting. And it's over.

Known for her hard-hitting investigations into where Chamillionaire buys his bling (And, yes, we just punched ourself in the face for using that word. We're truly sorry.) and inexplicably lengthening the duration of Nick Lachey's newsworthiness, Vanessa Minnillo appears to want to break out of her good-girl role. And what better way to do that than by pretending like you're going to cut off one of Lindsay Lohan's once supple and super-sized snoobs and hang it on your wall as a trophy? Well, by actually doing it, we guess. Vanessa's taking baby steps apparently. Page Six, who identified the mystery knife-wielder as Minnillo, reports on her aspirations:

When producers flew her to Los Angeles to cover the Grammys, "she was extremely high maintenance," said one source. "She insisted they fly her own hair and makeup people and her personal assistant out with her every time she flew to L.A. She only flew first class and stayed at the Four Seasons, and then she didn't want to work.

"Vanessa wants to be a celebrity, not interview them," said the source. "She wouldn't conduct post-show interviews because she wanted to party. She expected to be paid a full-time salary for a part-time job."

Page Six spotted Minnillo at one of the fall fashion shows changing seats for 15 minutes until she was satisfied. She's been known to bark orders at cocktail waitresses and cause scenes when she goes club hopping at night.

This is sort of like when the one innocent-seeming cheerleader gets sick of her boring persona--always expected to show up to pep rallies with enough freshly baked snicker doodles for the whole school--and starts hanging out with the school slut, smoking doobs between classes in the girls' bathroom and giving blowjobs after school under the bleachers.

Find Vanessa without the knives at MrSkin.com.