A Natural Beauty Catching Some Rays

As you sat around your uncle's backyard on Monday afternoon, sipping some Milwaukee's Best and choking down a couple burnt hot dogs, you probably looked up at the wrong moment, while your grandma was leaning down to wipe some ice cream off your nephew's face, and caught a glimpse of something truly frightening: saggy granny boobs peeking out of her Kmart Jaclyn Smith tank top. And you probably thought, "Man, my life sucks. Why can't I be a famous Hollywood celebrity? I bet they're all at fancy, glamorous cookouts surrounded by hot chicks." Well, we're here to reassure you, dude. Not all Hollywood celebrities are surrounded by the best bikini bods you've ever seen. Some of them get a big ol' face full of Tori Spelling.