Tom Cruise has had his fill of uppity women. No paid servant wife of his is going to be bothered with a silly little thing like a career. Katie Holmes is probably being kept pretty busy with auditing sessions, stuffing pillows under her shirt, and scanning her subconscious for thetans anyway. That doesn't leave much time for talking out of the side of her mouth on film.
While Katie Holmes is busy incubating a fake baby (Tom: Hey, guys, Katie had the baby! Incredulous observer: Wasn't she pregnant for about sixteen months? Tom: She just really loved being pregnant and didn't want it to end. Observer: Why does the baby look Chinese? Tom: Uh, Katie's great-great grandmother was Chinese. These things sometimes skip a few generations.), Tom doesn't want her to gain any undue, non-movie-promotion publicity. So until Tom's next joint drops (Mission: Impossible III, in theaters everywhere May 5th) Katie will only be seen hauling her Scientology-approved, lifelike pregnancy simulator around on her daily coffee runs. Cruise reportedly told "a friend" (we're sure Life & Style meant his bronze bust of L. Ron),
ìIíve got Katie tucked away, so no one will get to us until my child is born–and until I want them to. I said [Katie's] life from now on was going to be about being a mother. Iím not giving her the chance to turn into another Nicole.î
We still harbor a bit of Joey Potter love, so we're torn on whether or not Katie turning into another Nicole would be a good thing. On the one hand she's an Oscar-winning actress who seems genuinely happy with life. On the other hand she possesses something in her brain that approved of The Stepford Wives and she resembles a piece of latex stretched really tightly around a plastic science-class skeleton. We're guessing Katie's utter lack of talent would push her toward the latter.
Gaze upon pre-Tom Katie at MrSkin.com.
