There’s Nothing Bizarre About Lily Allen Topless in Harper’s Bazaar. Except the Horns.

Hey everybody! Welcome back. How was your holiday? Are you still pissed that you asked for a Blu-ray player and every Hayden Christensen movie and all you got was a Discman from your grandma? (They don’t sell iPods at Big Lots, so she had no choice.) Us, we watched A Christmas Story probably about eight times total (thanks, TBS!) and cried and cried and cried. Not because we had to see our family. Nah, we’re pretty much numb to that now. But because Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins broke up. Seriously heartbreaking stuff there. But if there’s one thing we know, it’s that the universe does not want us to suffer. So after a blow like that, it delivers something pretty. Like Lily Allen’s boobies. Thanks, universe! We were going to knit you a scarf in appreciation, but you know. We were busy. Looking at boobs. You know how it goes. After the cut, you can get distracted by Lily Allen’s boobs too.