We've got a nudity crisis on our hands, here, people. Actresses like Kate Winslet and Maggie Gyllenhaal are getting older, raising families, and may not have the time to flash beav on screen anymore. They've got binkies to launder. And who is going to replace our oft-nude favorites? Where is the next generation of dud doffers? Until Lindsay Lohan shows up on set having simply forgotten her panties, we have people like Rachel Bilson, who believes that the phrase "private parts" should be taken literally. It's time to descend to the fall-out shelter with copies of Showgirls, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, and Wild Things, cause it's gonna be a long winter.
Rachel says of her non-nude sex scene in The Last Kiss:
Nudityís always a consideration when youíre reading a script, and when I got to the bit where it said, ëHe takes down her panties,í I kind of blushed.
But itís all beautifully done. Itís not like Iím flashing my privates all over the place. Menís magazines are always wanting you to pose in really skimpy stuff.
I think your body is sacred and itís there to share with a loved one. Itís not for the whole world to see.
Oh pip, pip and bravo, Rachel. You pretended to have sex with Zach Braff while partially clothed. Wait, that is an accomplishment, as she was able to not spew bile all over his "Hey, I'm just a regular guy, a regular, funny, smarmy guy with pretentious taste in music" face. But we're talking about nudity here. And Rachel didn't pony any up. She even used a non-nude body double. That must be some sort of new fucking-through-a-hole- in-the-sheet kind of prudishness. Thanks, Rachel, for making Natalie Portman look like a free spirit.
And speaking of free spirits, Kate Winslet used to be one. But savor her nude scenes in Little Children, because they may be her last. Speaking of film nudity she said:
Oh, I am very much afraid of it! But I do feel that the nudity I've been asked to do was absolutely not just necessary, but crucial to the story. And in 'Little Children,' there's something very European about it. Though I do now find myself saying, Okay, that is it, no more nudity, I'm done with it! I have two kids, and there's some shit I just can't get away with! Time to stop!
Why, Kate, why? You have been the workhorse of celebrity nudity. You've definitely got a few good decades left in you. If Helen Mirren can still get naked at sixty, you have no right to give up so soon. And if you find yourself overly self-conscious about your aging breasts or leftover baby pounds (which we don't see at all, anyway) just close your eyes and think of England.
This may surprise you, but Rachel Bilson is not nude at MrSkin.com.
Kate, however, is in the Hall of Fame.
