Tara Reid Does Some Very Tara Reidish Things

Tara Reid has been a tabloid whack-a-mole for quite a few years now. Just because she had some slipshod titwork done and she likes a highball or two in the evenings! Come on! Lohan plows through twelve pounds of blow and wraps her SUV around a tree and she gets to pork three Italian studs in 24 hours. Winehouse smokes crack on film and she gets nominated for five Grammies. Where's the logic here? In the real world, blonde ladies who get completely faced on shooters and flash their ham chutes get lauded as precious angels from heaven. We will not rest until we get justice for Tara! We will picket in the streets wearing enormous sandwich boards that depict Tara with her boob hanging out, a cartoon halo drawn over her head. We will write to Congress, and we will petition for OK! to write one of their pleasant fluff pieces about her. But instead of "Inside Connie Sellecca's Quaint Country Kitchen" it will be "Inside Tara Reid's Toilet" and they will feature the artfully splattered vomit on the walls (with ultra-luxe 120 proof alcohol content). Luv u, Tara.