Tag Archives: underwear
Olivia Munn Makes Dorks Happy (Both Kinds, Actually)
Do you want to know a secret about the internet? Nerds keep it alive. You might think that the internet’s true purpose is cute kitty videos on YouTube or for you to stalk your high-school classmates on Facebook. But no. It’s to keep geeks happy. Do you think that your company’s IT guy is sitting [...]
January Jones’s GQ Outtakes: Less Boob, More Chair
We’re sure that somewhere in this vast world of ours there is a man with a ridiculously narrow fetish for hot blonde television stars in lingerie falling over in chairs. And likely if this man exists, he’s probably lurking around our neighborhood, peeking in the CelebNewsWire windows waiting for his ultimate moment. One day he [...]
Megan Fox to Wear Underwear Professionally
Despite being fair of face and figure and having a very photogenic tongue, Megan Fox isn’t doing so hot. Jennifer’s Body turned out to be a box-office failure, her director and Transformers crew hate her, and she’s still porking Brian Austin Green. But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east, and [...]
That Is Also a Pretty Dress
You almost certainly had a social studies teacher who wore a mint Sta-Prest pantsuit and a holiday themed brooch well into the ’90s, but she wasn’t out of style. She just found a look that worked for her. The same goes for Rihanna. Only instead of Mrs. Potter’s ankle-length Dacron, Rihanna’s go-to fabric is something [...]
Kelly Brook Proffers Enormous Breasts in Loaded
Today’s stories are about a dead DJ, Candy Spelling’s dog, and Macauley Culkin’s semen. We are imagining that if someone happened upon the CelebNewsWire by accident and were faced with this trio of terror, they’re probably not likely to bookmark. So like Secret on a lady’s underpits, we must pH balance our content. CNW is [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Hold on Tight, Spidermonkey, Here Comes Another Text
Robert Pattinson is as creepy as his fictional blood-lusting counterpart; sends Kristen Stewart 400 texts a month. (Celebitchy)
Ashley Olsen in her underwear. Hey, don’t look at us. You were the one with the Olsen Twins Countdown to Legality calendar on your computer for years, nerd. (Cityrag)
Getting down to the wire here! Mr Skin’s Top 100 [...]
The Most Popular Panties in Hollywood
Here we have sexy AnnaLynne McCord, star of the new 90210 and woman of many capital letters, getting out of a car. That doesn’t sound very exciting until you notice that her panties feature opaque black stripes over see-through, so it looks like her bologna folds are in jail. And heyyyy, aren’t those the same [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Cannes You Dig It
Brad’s all, “C’mon, Angelina, we have to get to Cannes” and she’s all, “Hold up, Brad, I gotta show the paps a little more of where Shilohs come from.” (Yeeeah!)
Maria Bello. Topless. Tied to a bed. Believe it. (Nudography)
And speaking of Maria Bello, did you know that she was from the greater [...]
Accio Titty!
Emma Watson is weird, because she's so dignified and sophisticated that she can even make an accidental undie slip look classy and like something the rest of us should aspire to. She's a master of the wand and a sultaness of spells, but try as she may, Hermione Granger was unable to keep her bra-covered [...]