CelebNewsWire» tattoos Archives – CelebNewsWire

CNW Junk Drawer: Nice Purple Rain Font

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 16:55:48 +0000

Adam Lambert’s album cover has been revealed and we seriously have no idea why people keep insisting this dude is gay. (Allie Is Wired)
Matthew Broderick flubbed his lines so badly at a recent play that audiences demanded their money back. Bomp bomp ohhhhhh yeeeeahhhh chicka chick ahhhh. (Celebitchy)
Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom got tattoos of each other’s initials because that’s what retards do. (Fatback)
There will be no charges filed in the Joe Francis/Brody Jenner/Jayde Nicole bar fight. The judge looked at the evidence and was like, “Yeah, these people are douches, fuck ‘em.” (Yeeeah!)
Taylor Swift and Taylor Lautner are probably dating, which is like the 2009 version of Victoria Principal and Andy Gibb. Swooon! (The Blemish)
Brittany Murphy mistook the sounds of a humming generator for gunfire and called the cops. I mistook her lips for an inflatable raft, boarded them, and sailed away to Honah Lee. (TMZ)
Dita Von Teese got tit implants after tripping balls on acid ruined hers. (Mr. Skin)
Happy 42nd birthday, Julia Roberts! Our present to you is posting candid shots of you in a bikini. (Egotastic)
Guess that celebrity camel toe! It’s more fun than Cootie! (Cityrag)
Charlize Theron answers to “Ass-Nuts”. Thanks for stealing my future baby name, dick. (E!)
This gif. (Oh No They Didn’t)
Gisele Bundchen’s baby bumpchen suddenly got yuge! (Daily Stab)

CNW Junk Drawer: Cut It Out, Megan

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 16:42:56 +0000

Megan Fox was a cutter. And we ain’t talking the Breaking Away kind. (Yeeeah!)
Burt Reynolds checks into rehab for prescription painkiller and alcohol addition. Godspeed, Bandit! (Gone Hollywood)
Even Obama thinks Kanye West is a jackass, and is not shy about saying so. This is the opinion that will globally unite us all! Peace on earth! (Amy Grindhouse)
Celebrity tramp stamps: a fun guessing game for the whole family. (Cityrag)
Top 10 celebrities with wacky physical deformities. Finally, Neve Campbell’s innie nips get their due! (Mr Skin)
Leelee Sobieski and Jenna Elfman are pregnant. Not from the same guy, though. (Allie Is Wired)
Jon Gosselin might be the new A ASSHOLE! He gave his “beloved” dogs back to the breeder. Which is funny, since he’s such a breeder. Haw! (D-listed)
Mickey Rourke’s reanimated mouth vs. a pink rose. Guess who wins. (Celeb Slam)
Tom Cruise says that having sex with him is “like flying”. Like flying over a rainbow into an enchanted glen filled with Greek boys in chaps doing the electric slide. (Celebitchy)

Ed Westwick and Hugh Jackman Naked (Lady Tattoos)

Agent E. — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 15:45:30 +0000

Nice tattoos, ladies. Guess we can finally put all of those pesky rumors to bed, since no gay man would ever be able to look at a naked lady staring up at him from his own arm every day. Well done.

We’re thinking about getting a naked lady tattooed on our Facebook page. You’d know that if you were our friend.

We Think That Ship's Already Sailed, Honey

Agent E. — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 17:52:42 +0000

How long until that damn giant robot movie hits theaters? No, we're not eagerly anticipating reveling in the cinematic mastery of Shia the Beef or Michael Bay, we're wondering how long it will be before we can stop writing about Megan Fox every damn day. A quick scan of the summer release schedule tells us we've got exactly one more week. So come back to CNW every day for more of Megan talking about weed and hot girls and her fuck the world attitude and the like. We're actually almost looking forward to seeing how many ways she can show us how unconventional and anti-establishment she is. Today it's tattoos. Ooooh, that's cutting edge. Meg says she needs to hold off on the ink for a bit, lest she regret her decisions.

They're definitely addictive. I don't have any that I truly regret yet, but I'm sure I will at some point.

"I'm trying to refrain from going forward for that reason. I don't want to be 40, looking at my arm in the mirror and going, 'Oh my God – what did I do?'

What did you do? You got Marilyn Monroe's face permanently emblazoned on your arm. Sure, it's not as bad as these, but we think you might end up gnawing off your arm in a couple of decades just so you won't have to look at it anymore.

CNW Junk Drawer: Cannes You Dig It

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Thu, 21 May 2009 18:19:38 +0000

Brad’s all, “C’mon, Angelina, we have to get to Cannes” and she’s all, “Hold up, Brad, I gotta show the paps a little more of where Shilohs come from.” (Yeeeah!)
Maria Bello. Topless. Tied to a bed. Believe it. (Nudography)
And speaking of Maria Bello, did you know that she was from the greater Philadelphia area? Isn’t that fascinating? Yeah! And it just so happens that Mr Skin has a Top 10 Sexiest Babes from Philly list out now! (Mr Skin)
Adriana Lima’s nipples in a gilded cage of a bra. (Drunken Stepfather)
Rihanna’s got a brand new, hopefully much less punchy, beau. (Amy Grindhouse)
Lady Gaga learns a sobering lesson. Bleached hair and skimpy white clothing with lots of jewelry makes folks think you’re a Russian prostitute. (Faded Youth)
Cameron Diaz has strict “if it’s yellow, let it mellow” rules. (Daily Stab)
Britney Spears in a bikini on the beach. No, you can go look. It’s nice! Seriously. Hey, hey. Look at us. Look. It’s okay. It’s okay. Really. Shhhh. (The Blemish)
Is Lindsay Lohan getting her poon chewn by Sam again? (Holy Moly)
Hayden Panettiere’s tattoo is spelled wrong. LOLOLOLOLOL. LOLOLOL forever. (Flisted)

Rihanna's Packin' Heat

Agent E. — Thu, 26 Mar 2009 17:30:53 +0000

Apparently Rihanna wants us to think she's tough. But does she do this by buying ad space during American Idol and telling all the little girls watching, "Don't EVER let a man hit you. They do not have the right to hit you. Chris Brown is A ASSHOLE, and if a man hits you he is also A ASSHOLE"? Of course not. She does it by getting a gun tattooed on her torso and letting her tattoo guy leak a pic on MySpace. Tough, right? That pic to the left, those are just toy guns that the tattoo artist drew on, explaining: "i really wanted to put it here… she loved em.. .but, cover girl wouldnt have liked it much… and they pay the bills!" So instead he inked her torso: "ended up doing it on her ribbs…" Here's the real thing:

It's OK, we guess, but we would definitely prefer a public flogging of Chris Brown. That would be badass.

CNW Junk Drawer: Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Thu, 08 Jan 2009 17:39:09 +0000

ï Mischa Barton, beach, bikini, weed, hipster halo. (Drunken Stepfather)

ï Lisa Bonet named her newborn son Nakoa-Wolf Manakauapo Namakaeha Momoa. It's the thing to say on a bright Hawaiian Christmas day. (Dlisted)

ï People's Choice Awards winners. Though you already know them because they're YOUR CHOICE. (CelebWarship)

ï 16-year-old Miley Cyrus wants a tattoo of her boyfriend's initials. No, no, Miley. Not until you get your zodiac sign and the kanji symbol for "strength". (Yeeeah!)

ï Anne Hathaway reveals what got her through the hard times. Anal sex! Wait, no. (Daily Stab)

ï Why don't you go look at ladies wearing football jerseys? It's not as if you have anything better to do, you lazy sack of puke. (Holy Taco)

ï Uppity Jessica Alba lost the sour for New Year's Eve, thanks in part to her buddy Booze. (Cityrag)

ï Lindsay Lohan and Sam Ronson split rumor #56b. (The Blemish)

Miley Cyrus: Bad Tattoo Enabler

Agent E. — Wed, 12 Nov 2008 18:01:59 +0000

Get ready for your tweener daughter (well, if you're old fuckers like us at least) to start begging you to let her get all tatted up, because Jesus zealot Stephen Baldwin just scored a guest spot on Hannah Montana by getting "HM" tattooed on his shoulder. Reports TMZ:

Holy Stigmata! Stephen Baldwin has branded himself with Hannah Montana's initials, all because Miley Cyrus dared him to.

Here's how the whole thing went down. We're told the unlikely friends met last year at the White House, where the 15-year-old dared Baldwin to get Hannah Montana's initials and in return she would let him appear on her Disney TV show since his daughters are huge fans of the series.

Fast forward to yesterday in Nashville, where sources tell us Miley's little sister, Brandi, heard on the radio that the 42-year-old outspoken Christian was also in town to promote his new book. So Miley, her mom, Brandi and Miley's boyfriend Justin Gaston decided to surprise Baldwin at a book signing. When they arrived, we're told Stephen showed off his "HM" tat and asked if he could cameo on her show, at which point Miley (reluctantly?) agreed.

It's Miley Cyrus' world and Stephen's just livin' in it.

Great, this is going to be the early '90s all over again, when every dude with slicked back hair got a Rocket from the Crypt tattoo because they heard it would get them into shows for free, until the epidemic spread so far that MTV's resident Republican Kennedy was even sporting a RFTC tat. Only this time the tattoos will appear beneath Delia's Madison sweaters instead of rolled-up plaid shirt sleeves. It's Circa: Miley!

CNW Junk Drawer: Heidi Christ, Superstar

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Tue, 01 Jul 2008 17:14:12 +0000

ï Reality show star/monster Heidi Montag promises to make a Christian album, compares herself to Jesus. "Because we both have really shiny hair and heal leopards," Heidi says. "That's what the poor people with zits are called, right?" (Yeeeah!)

ï Katherine Heigl downblouse cleavage shot. By the by, why is the term downblouse? What an antiquated word. We don't say "upcrinoline". Though "crack above slacks" has a nice ring to it. (Egotastic!)

ï Anne Hathaway does not heed the rap world's advice to "stop snitchin'"; snitches. (Flisted)

ï Cameron Diaz is beginning to look a bit Wildensteinian. (Cityrag)

ï Eva Longoria gets plugged. Fireplugged, that is! (The Blemish)

ï Pharrell thinks tattoos and skin are like wallpaper. (FemaleFirst)

ï Lindsay Lohan and chick chum Samantha Ronson get cutesy together. (CelebWarship)

ï Zooey Deschanel is everyone's favorite. You there. Go. Look upon her in a swimsuit. (Don't Link This)

ï Bridget the Midget's nip slip proves that not ALL of her is tiny. (Taxi Driver)

ï Amy Winehouse hit a fan (and it felt like a kiss). (Allie Is Wired)

ï Eddie Murphy wants to retire from movies. Well, see ya. (Daily Stab)

CNW Junk Drawer: Oh, Behave

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Wed, 16 Apr 2008 17:37:04 +0000

ï Gisele Bundchen may be costarring in the new Austin Powers movie. Terrific. What's next, Adriana Lima in Mighty Ducks V? (Daily Stab)

ï Eva Longoria and her husband want to invite Posh and Becks over for a foursome. A foursome consisting of slow and sensual games of Cootie! and Mousetrap. (Female Foist)

ï Debbie Gibson got a restraining order against her stalker, who sounds like a real Electric Douche. Haw haw haw! (Celebitchy)

ï "Deer dairy. today i went down and used the terlet at the Cogo's on wilshur bulevard. i plum fergoted my pantys inside! then i pixed up a ~~parperp~~ ~~pupozee~~ parparotzy man and kissed on him. rainbows r pritty!!!!!111" Britney Spears has video diaries and they may be released, woo hoo! (Hollywire)

ï John Mayer's body is a wonderland. A wonderland of cliche tattoos like koi fish and waves and blooming flowers. (Cityrag)

ï Elisha Cuthbert puts down cigarette long enough to grab her own tit in Maxim. (F-listed)

ï Evan Rachel Wood's transformation into boyfriend Marilyn Manson is complete. Excellent. Release the bats! (CelebWarship)

ï Bret Michaels says that "My hair is combined of my hair and the finest extensions Europe has to offer." And all this time we thought it was Britney's castoff weaveage sewn onto a bandanna. (ONTD)

ï Pictures of Pete Doherty in jail. Hair product fashioned out of leftover butter pats. (Dlisted)