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<channel>
	<title>CelebNewsWire&#187; Suri Cruise Archives  &#8211;  CelebNewsWire</title>
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	<description>Latest Celebrity News &#38; Gossip</description>
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			<item>
		<title>CNW Junk Drawer: They Tried to Make Me Go to Silicone Rehab</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/amy-winehouse-fake-lips.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/amy-winehouse-fake-lips.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 06 Nov 2009 18:08:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Amy Winehouse]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Britney Spears]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrity catfights]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Celebrity Sex Tapes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Chris Martin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gwyneth Paltrow]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[James Gandolfini]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Janine Lindemulder]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kate Bosworth]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Kelly Brook]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lindsay Lohan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[magazines]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael Lohan]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plastic surgery rumors]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plays]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Rachel Bilson]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sandra Bullock]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Shauna Sand]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=22090</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Amy Winehouse has traded needles in the arm for needles in the boobs and lips. (The Blemish)
Rachel Bilson sports Gwyneth Paltrow-style greaseball legs in Flaunt. (Yeeeah!)
James Gandolfini assaulted a paparazzo. Sadly, he later found out that the photog was not, in fact, carrying any nachos on him so it was all for naught. (Anything Hollywood)
Strap [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/amy_winehouse_lips.jpg"><img class="alignright size-thumbnail wp-image-22102" title="amy_winehouse_lips" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/11/amy_winehouse_lips-196x200.jpg" alt="amy_winehouse_lips" width="196" height="200" /></a><strong>Amy Winehouse</strong> has traded needles in the arm for needles in the <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/well-those-are-new.html" target="_blank">boobs</a> and lips. (<a href="http://theblemish.com/2009/11/amy-winehouse-has-a-new-hobby/" target="_blank">The Blemish</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Rachel Bilson</strong> sports Gwyneth Paltrow-style greaseball <a href="http://gawker.com/5279656/what-was-that-goop-all-over-gwyneth-paltrows-legs-on-the-tonight-show" target="_blank">legs</a> in <em>Flaunt</em>. (<a href="http://yeeeah.com/2009/11/05/rachel-bilson-in-flaunt-magazine/" target="_blank">Yeeeah!</a>)</li>
<li><strong>James Gandolfini</strong> assaulted a paparazzo. Sadly, he later found out that the photog was not, in fact, carrying any nachos on him so it was all for naught. (<a href="http://anythinghollywood.com/2009/11/james-gandolfini-assaults-cameraman-on-video/" target="_blank">Anything Hollywood</a>)</li>
<li>Strap on your lucite and jump into a puddle of bronzer&#8211;it&#8217;s the <strong>Shauna Sand</strong> <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/shauna-sand-sex-tape.html" target="_blank">sex tape</a> preview! (<a href="http://www.nudography.com/News.aspx?IDNews=3854" target="_blank">Nudography</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Tom</strong> isn&#8217;t the only <strong>Cruise</strong> who likes a phallic object in the mouth. (<a href="http://allieiswired.com/archives/2009/11/suri-cruise-still-on-the-bottle/" target="_blank">Allie Is Wired</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Kelly Brook</strong> places crumpets over her crumpets. Then we will eat dunk them in our milk. And other gross metaphors. (<a href="http://blog.mrskin.com/kelly-brook-topless-calendar-girls---12709" target="_blank">Mr. Skin</a>)</li>
<li>Australia is pissssssed about <strong>Britney Spears</strong> lip synching. (<a href="http://amygrindhouse.com/britney-spears-australian-tour-scrutiny.html" target="_blank">Amy Grindhouse</a>).</li>
<li><strong>Chris Martin</strong> calls <strong>Kate Bosworth</strong> Gwyneth&#8217;s &#8220;younger version&#8221;. And then he porked her. (<a href="http://www.celebitchy.com/79210/chris_martin_told_gwyneth_that_kate_bosworth_was_her_younger_version/" target="_blank">Celebitchy</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Sandra Bullock</strong> in custody battle for porn star&#8217;s kid. God, that sentence was awesome. (<a href="http://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2009/11/jesse-james-to-janine-lindemulder-lay-off-sandra-bullock/" target="_blank">Hollywood Gossip</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Michael Lohan</strong> wants to release more <strong>Lindsay</strong> <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/lindsay-lohan-voicemails-to-father.html" target="_blank">tapes</a>. Yeah, that&#8217;ll help. (<a href="http://poponthepop.com/2009/11/michael-lohan-releases-more-tapes/" target="_blank">Pop on the Pop</a>)</li>
<li>Stop being an asshole and be our pal on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/pages/CelebNewsWire/94950762313?ref=ts" target="_blank">Facebook</a>.</li>
</ul>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
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		<title>CNW Junk Drawer: &#8220;I Still Love Her, But She&#8217;s Retarded&#8221;</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/cnw-junk-drawer-i-still-love-her-but-shes-retarded.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/cnw-junk-drawer-i-still-love-her-but-shes-retarded.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 08 Oct 2009 17:21:10 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Uncategorized]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Brody Jenner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrity catfights]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrity nudity]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Guy Ritchie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hilary Swank]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jayde Nicole]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Joe Francis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Katie Price]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Lady Gaga]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Madonna]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mischa Barton]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nicole Kidman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[paparazzi]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[plastic surgery rumors]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tila Tequila]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=21268</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Nicole Kidman. Touch her and she will not flinch. Cut her and she will not bleed. She is Terminator Barbie. Botox syringe sold separately. (D-listed)
Tila Tequila threatens suicide. On Twitter, so you know she means business. (Yeeeah!)
Guy Ritchie says Madonna is &#8220;retarded&#8221;. You forgot &#8220;dummy&#8221; and &#8220;dipstick&#8221; and &#8220;diarrhea breath&#8221;, Guy. (Us Weekly)
Mischa Barton fears [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<ul>
<li><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/kidmancandleface1.jpg"><img class="alignright size-thumbnail wp-image-21269" title="kidman_wax_face" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/kidmancandleface1-187x200.jpg" alt="kidman_wax_face" width="187" height="200" /></a><strong>Nicole Kidman</strong>. Touch her and she will not flinch. Cut her and she will not bleed. She is Terminator Barbie. Botox syringe sold separately. (<a href="http://dlisted.com/node/34266" target="_blank">D-listed</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Tila Tequila</strong> threatens suicide. On Twitter, so you know she means business. (<a href="http://yeeeah.com/2009/10/08/tila-tequila-is-going-to-kill-herself/" target="_blank">Yeeeah!</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Guy Ritchie</strong> says <strong>Madonn</strong>a is &#8220;retarded&#8221;. You forgot &#8220;dummy&#8221; and &#8220;dipstick&#8221; and &#8220;diarrhea breath&#8221;, Guy. (<a href="http://www.usmagazine.com/celebritynews/news/guy-ritchie-madonna-is-retarded-2009710" target="_blank">Us Weekly</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Mischa Barton</strong> fears she&#8217;ll never work again. Not with that skank-ass scrubbly weave you won&#8217;t. BURN! (<a href="http://www.fadedyouthblog.com/139219/mischa-barton-fears-shell-never-work-again" target="_blank">Faded Youth</a>)</li>
<li>Video of the <strong>Jayde Nicole</strong>/<strong>Brody Jenner</strong>/<strong>Joe Francis</strong> <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/joe-francis-fights-with-brody-jenner.html" target="_blank">bar fight</a>. Joe drags Jayde across the floor by her hair, which comes as a complete shock to us because we thought he was a giving and nurturing gentleman who loved and respected women. (<a href="http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2009/10/world-exclusive-video-joe-francis-attack-caught-security-video" target="_blank">RadarOnline</a>)</li>
<li>Hell hath no fury like a <strong>Suri Cruise</strong> denied her JP Licks. (<a href="http://www.celebitchy.com/74466/suri_cruise_goes_berserk_over_ice_cream/" target="_blank">CeleBitchy</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Katie Price</strong> attacks the paps with an umbrella. Nice try, but Britney did it first, better, and balder, trick. (<a href="http://anythinghollywood.com/2009/10/katie-price-goes-on-umbrella-rampage/" target="_blank">Anything Hollywood</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Hilary Swank</strong>&#8217;s boyfriend&#8217;s 6-year-old son sees her boobs daily. (<a href="http://blog.mrskin.com/hilary-swank-sleeps-nude---12625" target="_blank">Mr. Skin</a>)</li>
<li><strong>Lady Gaga</strong> video, before she was Gaga&#8217;ed out. Aw, look. It&#8217;s Meadow Soprano. (<a href="http://amygrindhouse.com/lady-gaga-boiling-points-mtv-show-2005.html" target="_blank">Amy Grindhouse</a>)</li>
</ul>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Suri Cruise To Have Male Overlord Competition?</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/tom_cruise_katie_holmes_baby_boy_suri_br.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/tom_cruise_katie_holmes_baby_boy_suri_br.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 05 Nov 2008 18:00:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Agent E.</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[celebrity offspring]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrity pregnancies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Katie Holmes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nicole Kidman]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=18358</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Tom Cruise better ready the chloroform and a really big burlap sack and have his Scientological flunkies track down Chris Klein for a sperm sample, because Tom&#x27;s son Connor wants Katie Holmes to give him a baby brother. Reports OK!:
Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have made it no secret that they want more children in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/baby_brother_for_suri_cruise_OK%21.jpg"><img alt="baby_brother_for_suri_cruise_OK!.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/baby_brother_for_suri_cruise_OK%21-thumb.jpg" width="152" height="200" /></a><br />
<a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/tom_cruise/" target=" blank">Tom Cruise</a> better ready the chloroform and a really big burlap sack and have his Scientological flunkies track down Chris Klein for a sperm sample, because Tom&#x27;s son Connor wants Katie Holmes to give him a baby brother. Reports <a href="http://www.ok-magazine.com/news/view/10087" target=" blank"><em>OK!</em></a>:<br />
<blockquote>Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have made it no secret that they want more children in addition to daughter Suri &oacute; and no one is rooting for a new Cruise baby more than Tom&iacute;s ex, Nicole Kidman!</p>
<p>In the December issue of Glamour, the star of the upcoming Australia explains that Connor, her teenage son with Tom, is still hoping for a brother. &igrave;[He] would like one of us to have a boy,&icirc; she confesses. &igrave;He wants that boy. Katie?&icirc; </p>
<p>The idea that Nicole is throwing down a challenge to Katie, her successor in the role of Mrs. Tom Cruise, may seem odd to some. But since the actress married country superstar Keith Urban she and Tom have become increasingly civil, almost friendly &oacute; especially when it comes to their adopted children, Bella and Connor.</p>
<p>The two couples exchange Christmas gifts, and Katie personally selected $2,000 worth of baby goodies from Neiman Marcus in Beverly Hills to send to Nicole shortly before the July 7  birth of Sunday Rose, her daughter with Keith. As OK! exclusively reported at the time, Bella and Connor flew to Nashville to meet their new half sister just days later.</p>
<p>&igrave;At 41, Nicole knows she&iacute;s not likely to have another baby,&icirc; a friend of the actress tells OK!. &igrave;It&iacute;s obviously up to the much younger Katie to give Connor that baby brother.&icirc;</p>
<p>And the Cruises are more than ready to welcome a new child into their lives.</p>
<p>&igrave;Katie and Tom very much want another baby,&icirc; a friend of the couple tells OK!. &igrave;There may be no better time than now for Katie to get pregnant again and absolutely nothing would make Tom happier.&quot;
</p></blockquote>
<p> When Connor sat his adoptive mom and his stepmom down to present his request that one of their wombs be filled with a teeny little baby penis, Nicole screamed, &quot;No, I can&#x27;t! I can&#x27;t take another nine months without Botox! I won&#x27;t do it! You do it, Katie, it&#x27;s your turn. Tom&#x27;s paying you way more than he paid me anyway. It&#x27;s your duty.&quot;<br />
<span id="more-18358"></span><br />
<br />Did you know that you can see Katie Holmes nude at MrSkin.com? Well,  you can.</p>
<p>And you know what else? You can also see Nicole Kidman nude there.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Suri Sold Out By Bratz</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_star_lonely_talks_dolls_secr.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_star_lonely_talks_dolls_secr.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 25 Sep 2008 16:47:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[magazines]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=18236</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Suri Cruise, at two, has learned her first important lesson about growing up in a dirty little town called Hollywood: trust no one with your secrets. Even your Barbies have In Touch on speed dial. Shoulda known better than to trust someone named &#34;Chatty Cathy&#34;, kid.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri_star_dolls.jpg"><img alt="suri_star_dolls.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/suri_star_dolls-thumb.jpg" width="147" height="200" /></a><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri_cruise/" target="_blank">Suri Cruise</a>, at two, has learned her first important lesson about growing up in a dirty little town called Hollywood: trust no one with your secrets. Even your Barbies have In Touch on speed dial. Shoulda known better than to trust someone named &quot;Chatty Cathy&quot;, kid.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Suri Cruise Washes That Gray Right Outta Her Hair</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_dyed_lightened_hair_highligh.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_dyed_lightened_hair_highligh.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 05 May 2008 17:34:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Agent E.</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=17730</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
After what appears to be a summery dye job, we hear Suri&#x27;s being fitted for dentures next week. It&#x27;ll save her the hassle of going through Daddy Tom&#x27;s embarrassing braces phase.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri%20cruise%20lightened%20hair.jpg"><img alt="suri cruise lightened hair.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/suri%20cruise%20lightened%20hair-thumb.jpg" width="132" height="200" /></a><br />
After what appears to be a summery dye job, we hear Suri&#x27;s being fitted for dentures next week. It&#x27;ll save her the hassle of going through Daddy Tom&#x27;s embarrassing <a href="http://www.foxnews.com/photoessay/photoessay_873_images/tom_braces.jpg" target=" blank">braces phase</a>.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Katie Holmes Attempts to Break Free of Cruisean Shackles</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/katie_holmes_leaves_tom_cruise_separate.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/katie_holmes_leaves_tom_cruise_separate.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 17 Apr 2008 17:39:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Katie Holmes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=17679</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It&#x27;s been nigh on a fortnight since we&#x27;ve heard any news about the bangs-sporting, marathon-faking, lift-wearing entity known as TomKat. It seems that the formerly ubiquitous gossip stories about Katie Holmes crying and staring forlornly out of tower windows, Rapunzel-style, have been overtaken by ones about Heidi Montag&#x27;s favorite brand of mustard, so we&#x27;re delighted [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/tom_thumb_giant_katie.jpg"><img alt="tom_thumb_giant_katie.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/tom_thumb_giant_katie-thumb.jpg" width="122" height="200" /></a>It&#x27;s been nigh on a fortnight since we&#x27;ve heard any news about the bangs-sporting, marathon-faking, lift-wearing entity known as TomKat. It seems that the formerly ubiquitous gossip stories about Katie Holmes crying and staring forlornly out of tower windows, Rapunzel-style, have been overtaken by ones about Heidi Montag&#x27;s favorite brand of mustard, so we&#x27;re delighted to bring you today&#x27;s tale, courtesy of <a href="http://www.starmagazine.com/news/14092" target="_blank">Star</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>According to our sources, Katie, who was offered a role on Broadway, is trying to break away from her controlled life under the watchful eyes of her husband and move to Manhattan in what will be a sort of trial separation.</p>
<p>&quot;She desperately needs to be on her own for a while, but there&#x27;s no way <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/tom_cruise/" target="_blank">Tom Cruise</a> is going to let her take <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri_cruise/" target="_blank">Suri</a> away,&quot; an insider tells Star. &quot;There&#x27;s no way he&#x27;ll allow it. He just doesn&#x27;t want Katie &oacute; or Suri &oacute; out of his sight for long. He told her that if she goes to New York, fine, but he goes with her.&quot;</p></blockquote>
<p>Tom&#x27;s just jealous. Because he would love to go away to New York. <a href="http://gawker.com/5002269/the-cruise-indoctrination-video-scientology-tried-to-suppress" target="_blank">Just go and . . . romp . . . and play . . . and just . . . do that</a>. There are times he&#x27;d like to do that. But he can&#x27;t because . . . he knows. <em>He knows</em>.<br />
<span id="more-17679"></span></p>
<p>Katie gets NAKED at MrSkin.com.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>CNW Junk Drawer: Eatin&#039; Kids, Beatin&#039; Pigs</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/cnw_junk_drawer_10.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/cnw_junk_drawer_10.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 04 Apr 2008 17:33:17 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Angelina Jolie]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Anne Hathaway]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Brandon Davis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cameron Diaz]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebrity arrests]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[celebs in bikinis]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Gisele Bundchen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hayden Panettiere]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Jerry Seinfeld]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Megan Fox]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mena Suvari]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Naomi Campbell]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=17639</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[&#239;  Bite-sized Heroes star Hayden Panettiere volunteered at World Children&#x27;s Day, where she proceeded to devour all the babies under age two and pick her teeth with their discarded, semi-gnawed rib bones. (The Blemish)
&#239;  Even when you take away her hand-held communication devices and remove her from the vicinity of assistants, Naomi Campbell [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/hayden_child.jpg"><img alt="hayden_child.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/hayden_child-thumb.jpg" width="300" height="200" /></a>&iuml;  Bite-sized <em>Heroes</em> star Hayden Panettiere volunteered at World Children&#x27;s Day, where she proceeded to devour all the babies under age two and pick her teeth with their discarded, semi-gnawed rib bones. (<a href="http://theblemish.com/2008/04/ahh-scary-white-woman/" target="_blank">The Blemish</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Even when you take away her hand-held communication devices and remove her from the vicinity of assistants, Naomi Campbell will come out swinging and hissing and&#8211;yes&#8211;spitting. (<a href="http://www.yeeeah.com/blog/2008/04/04/naomi-campbell-arrested-at-london-airport/" target="_blank">Yeeeah!</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/brandon_davis/" target="_blank">Brandon Davis</a>, alias &quot;Greasy Bear&quot;, aka &quot;Fat Elvis&quot;, is no longer anti-Firecrotch. He&#x27;s decided he hates black people and gays way more. (<a href="http://www.tmz.com/2008/04/04/what-a-douche-greasy-drops-f-and-n-bombs/" target="_blank">TMZ</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Angelina Jolie at a nubile sixteen! Before the blood, the Brad, the Billy Bob, the babies there was . . . really unflattering 1990s bathing suits with curious sheer cut-outs? (<a href="http://www.egotastic.com/entertainment/celebrities/angelina-jolie/angelina-jolie-bikini-model-at-16-003423" target="_blank">Egotastic</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Mena Suvari&#x27;s crapper is delectable in a thong. Do we mean &quot;butt&quot; or &quot;toilet&quot;? Click here to find out the shocking answer! (<a href="http://www.drunkenstepfather.com/index.php/2008/04/03/mena-suvari-in-a-thong-bikini-showing-off-her-ass-of-the-day/" target="_blank">Drunken Stepfather</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Anne Hathaway&#x27;s boyfriend was arrested for bouncing a $250,000 check. Aw, that could happen to anyone. Oh, wait, we though that said &quot;$2.50 check&quot;. (<a href="http://www.celebwarship.com/wp/?p=9761" target="_blank">Celeb Warship</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Who wears assless shorts? Gisele Bundchen wears assless shorts. (<a href="http://www.idontlikeyouinthatway.com/2008/04/gisele-bundchen-has-nice-shorts.html" target="_blank">I Don&#x27;t Like You In That Way</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  I got fingered by Megan Fox (and it felt like a kiss). (<a href="http://www.hollywoodtuna.com/?p=4666" target="_blank">Hollywood Tuna</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Lucky Kristen Bell gets to pose on the cover of <em>Cosmopolitan</em> next to the blurb &quot;When Your Boobs Act Weird&quot;. (<a href="http://www.dailystab.com/kristen-bell-does-cosmo/" target="_blank">Daily Stab</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/jerry_seinfeld/" target="_blank">Jerry Seinfeld</a> flipped his car. He&#x27;s OK though, so we can all have a hearty guffaw or whatever. (<a href="http://www.holytaco.com/2008/04/03/whats-the-deal-with-seinfeld-flipping-his-car/" target="_blank">Holy Taco</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  Cameron Diaz is looking very Amazonian in GQ. (<a href="http://bittenandbound.com/2008/04/04/cameron-diaz-hot-in-british-gq-may-2008-photos/" target="_blank">Bitten and Bound</a>)</p>
<p>&iuml;  <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/tom_cruise/" target="_blank">Tom Cruise</a> takes Suri to the playground. Not to play, though. To have a series discussion about SPs and OC Clears. (<a href="http://socialitelife.buzznet.com/2008/04/04/suri_cruise_lives.php" target="_blank">A Socialite&#x27;s Life</a>)</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Suri Spoiled by Scientology</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/tom_cruise_katie_holmes_suri_sceintology.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/tom_cruise_katie_holmes_suri_sceintology.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Oct 2007 17:55:55 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Agent E.</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Katie Holmes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Scientology]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=17081</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Have you ever wondered what&#x27;s involved in a Scientological upbringing? Do you think it&#x27;s all 18-hour auditing sessions and &#34;yes master&#34;s and &#34;I denounce my thetans&#34; and &#34;I did not see Daddy tongue kissing John Travolta in the herb garden&#34;? US Weekly assures us that it&#x27;s, oh, so much more.
Everyone knows that Suri Cruise, Tom [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri%20sneaks%20stealthily.jpg"><img alt="suri sneaks stealthily.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/suri%20sneaks%20stealthily-thumb.jpg" width="142" height="200" /></a><br />
Have you ever wondered what&#x27;s involved in a Scientological upbringing? Do you think it&#x27;s all 18-hour auditing sessions and &quot;yes master&quot;s and &quot;I denounce my thetans&quot; and &quot;I did not see Daddy tongue kissing John Travolta in the herb garden&quot;? <a href="http://www.usmagazine.com/cover_663" target=" blank"><em>US Weekly</em></a> assures us that it&#x27;s, oh, so much more.<br />
<blockquote>Everyone knows that <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri_cruise/" target=" blank">Suri Cruise</a>, <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/tom_cruise/" target=" blank">Tom Cruise</a> and Katie Holmes&iacute; adorable little daughter, leads a charmed existence but her upbringing as a Scientologist remains largely a mystery. How does the religion started by L. Ron Hubbard influence Suri&iacute;s life on a daily basis?</p>
<p>Us Weekly has learned that while Suri &#8212; who as a baby was breastfed and nursed on a mixture of barley water, milk and corn syrup which Hubbard advocated as being healthier than formula and breast milk &#8212; is too young to take classes at the Scientology Centre, the 18-month-old is constantly surrounded by believers, including her two nannies.</p>
<p>&igrave;Tom doesn&iacute;t like associating with people who aren&iacute;t Scientologists,&icirc; says an insider.</p>
<p>Additionally, Holmes, 29, and Cruise, 45, have a hard time saying no to Suri. But it&iacute;s not simply because they&iacute;re pushovers.</p>
<p>&igrave;It&iacute;s all about being positive and supportive,&icirc; says the couple&iacute;s friend (Hubbard advised parents to &igrave;try to be the child&iacute;s friend.&icirc;) As for discipline, one former church member tells Us that Scientologists do not scold their children, but instead explain that bad behavior (like throwing a toy) is the &igrave;wrong action.&icirc; (A Scientology rep tells Us, &igrave;How a parent disciplines their child is left up to the parent.&icirc;)</p>
<p>Cruise and Holmes, says their pal, are very lenient and do not like to give Suri too many rules: &igrave;Suri pretty much does whatever she wants, whenever she wants. If she fusses before bed, they let her stay up later. If they want her to go swimming and she cries, they&iacute;ll take her out. If she whines about food, they&iacute;ll ask her what else she wants to eat. They always want to please her.&icirc; </p></blockquote>
<p> So Suri&#x27;s growing up wearing $500 Chanel diapers, drinking the infant version of Red Bull, and never hearing the word no. We&#x27;re just going to start calling her Veruca Salt right now in preparation.</p>
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		<title>An Open Letter from Shiloh Jolie-Pitt to Suri Cruise, Part 3</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/an_open_letter_from_shiloh_joliepitt_to.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/an_open_letter_from_shiloh_joliepitt_to.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 15 Aug 2007 17:38:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Inspector S. (CNW Admin)</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[models]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[movies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Shiloh Jolie-Pitt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=16800</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Dear Suri Cruise,
How&#x27;s it flying, homeslice? It&#x27;s me, your ultimate frenemy, Shiloh Jolie-Pitt!
Well, it&#x27;s been a while since I&#x27;ve reached out to you, Suri Cruise. We&#x27;re from two different worlds, you and me. You, with your e-meters, maniacally grinning midget sirer, and embarrassingly excessive designer wardrobe, and me with my saintly forebears, world travels, and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/shiloh_brad.jpg"><img alt="shiloh_brad.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/shiloh_brad-thumb.jpg" width="167" height="200" /></a>Dear <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri_cruise/" target="_blank">Suri Cruise</a>,</p>
<p>How&#x27;s it flying, homeslice? It&#x27;s me, your ultimate frenemy, <a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/shiloh_joliepitt/" target="_blank">Shiloh Jolie-Pitt</a>!</p>
<p>Well, it&#x27;s been a while since I&#x27;ve reached out to you, Suri Cruise. We&#x27;re from two different worlds, you and me. You, with your e-meters, maniacally grinning midget sirer, and embarrassingly excessive designer wardrobe, and me with my saintly forebears, world travels, and infant philanthropy. But today I was perusing <em>Life &amp; Style</em> and I damn near choked on my organic, locally-grown strained vegetables when I read that you, Suri NoMiddleName Cruise, were offered a &quot;lucrative&quot; <a href="http://sfgate.com/cgi-bin/blogs/sfgate/detail?blogid=7&#038;entry_id=19435" target="_blank">modeling contract</a> for Baby Gap. Oh, Suri. Poor, misguided, sad little Suri. For someone a full one month and eight days older than me, you&#x27;re so unwise. Modeling is work for the untalented, the masses, the sad little tiny people hoping and praying that one day, a lesser Weinstein will see their face in a Kraft ad and catapult them into the Hollywood fast track via some sweet extra work. Me, I bypassed all that bullshit and went straight to the big fuckin&#x27; time&#8211;I&#x27;ve already had my first role in an F. Scott Fitzgerald adaptation and I have my own <a href="http://www.celebitchy.com/5261/shiloh_jolie-pitt_gets_her_own_imdb_entry/" target="_blank">profile</a> at <a href="http://www.imdb.com/name/nm2497257/" target="_blank">IMDb</a>. I should have my SAG card before I see my second birthday and I&#x27;ll be working with Lars Von Trier before my third. Hopefully by then you&#x27;ll have hit the big time and be donning Toughskins for the Sears insert in the Sunday paper. Boo-yah, bitch.</p>
<p>See you in hell,</p>
<p>Shiloh Jolie-Pitt</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Suri Cruise: Making Us Forget Tom Is Crazy Since April &#039;06</title>
		<link>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_making_us_forget_tom_is_craz.html</link>
		<comments>http://www.celebnewswire.com/archives/suri_cruise_making_us_forget_tom_is_craz.html#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 20 Jun 2007 17:39:18 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Agent E.</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[celebrity offspring]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Suri Cruise]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tom Cruise]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.celebnewswire.com/?p=16632</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
Look at how incredibly adorable she is. And she doesn&#x27;t&#x27; seem afraid to touch him. So he must be OK, right? Right?
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.celebnewswire.com/suri%20cruise%20cute%20tom%20cruise%20not.jpg"><img alt="suri cruise cute tom cruise not.jpg" src="http://www.celebnewswire.com/wp-content/uploads/import/suri%20cruise%20cute%20tom%20cruise%20not-thumb.jpg" width="280" height="200" /></a><br />
Look at how incredibly adorable she is. And she doesn&#x27;t&#x27; seem afraid to touch him. So he must be OK, right? Right?</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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