Tag Archives: Scarlett Johansson
Woody Allen Sez: "If You Like Sex, Don't See My Movie"
Woody Allen is not a very savvy businessman. Most directors would let rumors of sexed-up storylines and hot lesbian action run rampant, but not Woody. He says, "There ain't none of that crap in my movie, pervos; it's art." According to WENN:
Woody Allen has denied rumours of racy sex scenes between Penelope Cruz and Scarlett [...]
Sticky Cristina Lesbo-moan-a
If Hollywood movies have taught us anything, it’s that darkrooms are seriously sexy places and if more than one person is occupying one, the red lighting and chemical smells will impel them to make out. That, and the fact that tough guys always crack their necks slowly before beating or killing you. But back to [...]
Scarlett Johansson Nabs a Canadian
Bazoomy hepatitis-negative blonde Scarlett Johansson is officially engaged to oft shirtless bad-movie specialist Ryan Reynolds. So how long do we have to wait until people start saying they heard from a friend of a friend of a friend of Scarj's hairstylist that she's carrying a tiny little package of chiseled abs in her womb? With [...]
Scarlett Johansson's "Falling Down" Video Will Have You Falling Asleep
What can we say about Scarlett Johansson’s first music video? There are no bright colors to shock your not-fully-awake brain. Um, what else? She obviously made this song for a love of the music, because no one in their right mind would think it’s going to be the next “Best of Both Worlds.” The only [...]
Scarlett Johansson Does Not Have a Diseased Vagina
There are a few things that we all know about girls and promiscuity. Like for instance, a girl who has a tramp stamp will do all kinds of freaky things in bed, but she'll never admit to them. But Scarlett Johansson wants you to know that blonde hair + big boobs ≠ riddled with STDs. [...]
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Scarlett Johansson Makes Up for Ugly Tattoo with Naked Boob
Once the soft, warm, globular paragon of feminine buxomosity, Scarlett Johansson has, as of late, been placed on the back burner due to the gossip world’s present obsession with celebritites being pregnant with twins. But let us not forget Scarjo, who, long before Max and Emme, bore twins of her own. Twins made out of [...]
Sacrlett Johansson Auctioned off to Highest Bidder
Most men who haven't hit Viagra age would scour together all of their pennies and mutual funds for a chance to breathe in the sweet nectar that wafts from the pristine skin of Scarlett Johansson. But not many men could actually afford to drop the equivalent of a brand new Lexus on the privilege. According [...]
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Another Present from CelebNewsWire to You
Natalie Portman says: "Seriously, I would really want to grab Scarlett's breasts. She's got beautiful ones." Stow that in your brain pan and let it fester. And you're welcome.
Scarlett Johansson Must Really Love Sunsets
This morning we were faced with a mystery. And we're happy to say that, just like Angela Lansbury, we cracked that shit wide open. Now we're sitting down at our typewriter piecing together the fragments of our genius. Presented at left is a photo we found this morning at Oh No They Didn't of Scarlett [...]