Tag Archives: Russell Crowe
“Are You Ready to Die?”
Russell Crowe is not a man to let anyone get the better of him, even if it is just in print. We thought that he was a thoroughly modern man, using technology to upbraid his opponents. OK, maybe upbraid isn’t the word we were looking for. Maybe “beat senselessly” would’ve been a better choice. But [...]
Karolina Kurkova, Russell Crowe Are Too Fat
Hollywood does not exist to hold a mirror up to middle America; it exists to torture your fat ass into thinking that you're a disgusting mound of flesh. And in order to do that its representatives, i.e., actors and models and other pretty people, must remain as lithe as possible through calorie counting, getting their [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Tarred and Feathered
ï Actor Chris Penn found dead in Santa Monica. Goodnight, Willard, may you dance around tractors in heaven. Let's hear it for the boy.
ï Oh baby, Keith! Keith's got what Kidman neee-eeeeds! But she say he's just a friend! She she say he's just a friend!
ï Promo pics of an old but [...]
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Also tagged Avril Lavigne, celebrity deaths, celebrity hookups, celebrity nudity, celebrity pregnancies, Chris Penn, Felicity Huffman, Kanye West, movies, Nicole Kidman, Pamela Anderson, paparazzi, Paris Hilton, Sharon Stone
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Hollywood, Bursting with Child
Years ago, legions of Tinseltown types watched your favorite bloatbag and ours,
30 Expensive Foot of Grunts
So you're planning a wedding, or a lavish dinner party, or a fundraiser of some sort, yes? And it's time to hire the entertainment. Magicians are too corny, belly dancers are soooo 1998, Glass Tiger are all booked up, and clowns don't provide the phone-throwing white rage your soiree guests crave. What to do? Why, [...]
CNW Junk Drawa: Hookups and Hairdos
ï Natalie Portman: Last of the Mohicans.
ï Dear Russell Crowe: PLEASE PUNCH US. WE NEED THE CASH.
ï Scar-Jo and Josh Hartnett (Jo-Ho?) move in together! Eh, it's destined to fail. "Scarlett Hartnett" just sounds so douchey.
ï Fleck's million-pound pits.
ï Annie Hall is porking Ted "Theodore" Logan.
ï Ohhhh, when Keef [...]
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Also tagged advertisements, Ben Affleck, celebrity hookups, Diane Keaton, Josh Hartnett, Keanu Reeves, Keith Richards, Mick Jagger, Mos Def, Natalie Portman, Scarlett Johansson
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Russell Crowe's Band Breaks Up; A Wounded World Weeps
We here at CelebNewsWire love Russell Crowe. Not that we think he's a good actor or particularly enjoy his movies; we just think he's entertaining. But unfortunately this week he became a little less entertaining as his band, 30 Odd Foot of Grunts (or TOFOG, as those in the know like to call them), have [...]
9/11: Russell Crowe's Fault
It's official. Now we've heard absolutely everything. Every insane, asinine, self-absorbed-celebrity-related story possible has crossed our desk. Seriously, we're going home. Russell Crowe claims that al Qaeda was plotting to kidnap him.
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Crowe's Dong Halts Filming
We've made no secret of our love for the copy editor-free femalefirst.com and their delightfully droll headlines. We think today's gem "Did
Clooney: Master of Sarcasm
It seems that Russell Crowe is a little desperate for attention lately. He spent all of 2004 away from the big screen, and he's a bit scared that the fickle movie-going public has forgotten him. What's a boy to do? Why, take a few swipes at stars who had hit movies last year, of course. [...]