Tag Archives: Paula Abdul
Ellen DeGeneres to Idolize America
Ellen Degeneres is America’s most beloved gay woman since Lady Elaine from Mr. Rogers, so it’s no surprise that people are falling all over themselves to sign her for projects. Talk shows. Awards show hosting. Peddling credit cards and cream blush. Now she can add another job to her resume: Paula Abdul part 2. Ellen’s [...]
I’m Forever Your Girl (Until I Get Canned)
American Idol is taking two steps forward while Paula Abdul takes two steps back. Late last night, Paula took to the Twitters to break the news that she’s MC Skat Katting the show. She said
With sadness in my heart, I’ve decided not to return to IDOL . . . I do without any doubt have [...]
From the No Shit Files
This morning, we got into work, cleared away a bunch of Cuervo bottles and decimated pinata detritus, and noticed that our "No Shit?" file was bursting at the seams, so we're going to empty it into your eyeballs in one shot.
ï Paula Abdul Admits She Was Addicted to Pills
According to US Weekly:
[...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Just Say SheNAE to Pants
ï Shenae Grimes piles on all her clothes–lace stockings, Jack Sparrow boots, lumberjack shirt–at once. All her clothes except for the pants part. (IDLYITW)
ï Kendra Wilkinson says she sneaked some contraband penis into the Playboy mansion. (Yeeeah!)
ï Victoria Beckham models for Armani skivvies; miraculously does not look like a praying mantis while doing [...]
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Also tagged advertisements, Britney Spears, Hugh Hefner, Jenny McCarthy, Jim Carrey, Justin Timberlake, Kendra Wilkinson, Nicollette Sheridan, Patrick Swayze, plastic surgery rumors, Shenae Grimes, television, underwear, Victoria Beckham
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Obligatory "MC Skat Kat Did It" Joke Here
A woman's body was found yesterday morning in her car, parked outside Paula Abdul's home. God, as if poor Paula didn't have enough on her plate. Here's a news report, via Celebitchy:
A woman was found dead on Tuesday evening, near a home believed to be owned by Paula Abdul, Access Hollywood has learned.
[...]
Dina Lohan Becomes Even More Beautiful
Could the faces of Dina Lohan and Paula Abdul have been molded from the same prototype? Better question: Is either lady willing to divulge the name of their oh-so-proficient doctor? Because they sure are looking gorge.
Paula Abdul: Your Pee-merican Idol
"Hey Paula, hey hey, Paula. Can I take your picture, can I, please? Pleeeeease? No, I don't want to wait till you're done dropping a deuce. I wanna do it now. NOW! I'm just gonna take this convenient little camera phone and reach right over the wall of this here toilet stall and SNAP! Gotcha! [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Ambrosio of the Gods
ï Model Alessanda Ambrosio is out Victoria's Secret undies. Yayyy! And into a bikini. Boooo. No, wait. Yay. (Egotastic!)
ï "I'm Fat Shady, yes I'm the Fat Shady, all you other Fat Shadys are just imatatin'." (Cityrag)
ï We can't improve on this original headline: 1 Hayden, 2 Cups. (Hollywood Tuna)
ï Penelope Cruz and [...]
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Also tagged advertisements, Alessandra Ambrosio, awards shows, Blake Lively, Bono, Britney Spears, celebrity catfights, celebs in bikinis, Eminem, Hayden Panettiere, Jennifer Lopez, Mariah Carey, models, Penelope Cruz, plastic surgery rumors
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Hey Paula, You Awake Yet?
Think your job sucks? Try being the man assigned to coat Paula Abdul's saggy face in a fresh coat of shellac every morning. You'd have to rush, rush (yeah, we're sorry, that was awful) to finish before she shook off her pill-inducing stupor, plus you'd always be wiping up trickles of drool. Page Six reports:
PAULA [...]
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CNW Junk Drawer: Cuts Like a Knife
ï Paula Abdul has a new contorted face! Look into her stretched eyes! Oh oh! She's been tellin' lies! (Yeeeah!)
ï Larry Birkhead thinks Dannielynn has her mom's pouty lips, long legs and chubby toes. Jury's out on who she takes after in the implant and veneer department, though. (I'm Not Obsessed)
ï Britney [...]
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Also tagged Ashley Olsen, Britney Spears, Bryan Adams, Dannielynn Hope Marshall Stern, David Hasselhoff, Jessica Simpson, Larry Birkhead, Lindsay Lohan, Pamela Anderson, plastic surgery rumors, see-through shots
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