Tag Archives: magazines
Aw, Look! She Has Her Daddy’s Hairline
Samantha Burke, the lady into whom Jude Law ejaculated minus a rubber, is cashing in on her half famous/half mortal progeny nicely. She granted exclusive rights to pictures of new baby Sophia to Hello! magazine for a cool $300,000. And Jude is not cool with this. A source told the NY Daily News:
“He wants to [...]
What’s So Super About These Models? Nudity.
Supermodels. They’re usually not the smartest people in the room. If you were out to lunch with a model, a failing fourth grader, and Britney Spears (Don’t judge; that’s our standing Thursday noon reservation at The Ivy), who would you let calculate the tip? So even though Mr. Skin declared last week Official Nude Victoria’s [...]
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Also tagged celebrity nudity, Miranda Kerr, models, Naomi Campbell
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January Jones’s GQ Outtakes: Less Boob, More Chair
We’re sure that somewhere in this vast world of ours there is a man with a ridiculously narrow fetish for hot blonde television stars in lingerie falling over in chairs. And likely if this man exists, he’s probably lurking around our neighborhood, peeking in the CelebNewsWire windows waiting for his ultimate moment. One day he [...]
Dear Lindsay, I’m in a Magazine! Love, Daddy
How is it that Michael Lohan continues to shock us? We know he’s the creepiest creep who ever creeped among creepazoids, yet every time he takes his creepiness a step further we’re all, “WTF, Mike?” Today’s creepy goings-on involve Michael writing a personal letter to Lindsay—and publishing it in In Touch. According to Contact Music:
His [...]
You Will Like Sexy Amber Heard Pics. Because We Said So.
Amber Heard has been in some movies. You’ve probably seen some of them. Pineapple Express. The Informers. Zombieland. And if not, you’ve probably seen naked pictures of her on the internet. Because that’s what you do, you perv. You save all of your cash for more important things, like Pall Malls and Jim Beam, and [...]
Sparrow Madden Flies Toward Magazine Cover Fame
In our greed-filled never-ending quest to get more traffic to CelebNewsWire, we’ve been scouring our stats and discovered two things: readers like dames with no clothes on and they like pictures of babies. Which means that our fans are depraved perverts and also Jennifer Aniston. Today, People released the first pictures of the second offspring [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Up, Up and Away in My Dad’s Beautiful Mylar Stormchasing Balloon
Balloon Boy and his non-airborne brethren have a (c)rap video about avoiding “pussification”. Hey, they’re better than the Beastie Boys. (YouTube)
Balloon Boy also totally busted his fame-fellating parents by saying “You said we did this for the show.” Hahaha. (Celebitchy)
And after that, Balloon Boy barfed twice on live TV. The end. (Dlisted)
Amy Winehouse has allegedly [...]
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Also tagged Amy Winehouse, boobs, celebrity hookups, celebs in bikinis, Falcon Heene, Fergie, Halle Berry, Jenna Fischer, Jessica Simpson, Khloe Kardashian, Meghan McCain, Vikki Blows
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January Jones, Boob Faker?
The other day we showed you some ridiculously awesome pics of Mad Men star January Jones and her mega cleave in GQ. And if you were anything like us, you said, “Hot holy hell, look at those hooters!” and then tried to remember exactly how Balki Bartokomous’s Dance of Joy went. But today there are [...]
Men’s Fitness’s Newest Workout Aid: Ashley Greene
This may come as a shock, but we’re not really the gym-going type. A treadmill just doesn’t have as much appeal as watching Sexiest Celebrity Beach Bodies on E! One has girls in bikinis. The other has some fat dude with back hair grunting and sweating on the machine next to you. The choice is [...]
January Jones Says, “Suck on These, Joanie!”
You know how sometimes the younger sister ends up being the wild one? The older sister gets to do everything first, sure, but then the younger one gets so overcome with jealousy that she’s all, “Yeah, sis, you think you’re better than me cause you can smoke pot and give blowjobs? I’ll show you. I’ll [...]