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Tag Archives: Lindsay Lohan

Lilo and Greasy Hit the John for Fun

This morning we woke up and felt like something was missing in our lives. Something large and clammy and teeming with riches. Then we sparked up the old computer and lo and behold, a big fat pouty meatball named Brandon Davis was back in our lives! X17 has pictures and a video of Greasy Bear [...]

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Seeing Lindsay Lohan’s Beautiful Face Should Be Payment Enough for Goods and Services

It’s officially over. What, you ask? Lindsay Lohan’s career. But how do we know? Is it because we are other-level geniuses who see into the eye of celebrity and discern all of its most closely guarded secrets? Well, yes, but also because we read People. That tells us a lot. Like how Lindsay wasn’t able [...]

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CNW Junk Drawer: Sammy Snow-sa

Sammy Sosa used to be a Dominican dude, right? Not a Cullen-white green-eyed guy? We didn’t just make that up? (Gabby Babble)
It’s all right cuz she’s saved by the fetus: Tiffani (-Amber) Thiessen is with child. (PopEater)
Lilogate continues: in more tapes, Lindsay Lohan’s charming and selfless parents allege that she was porking Heath Ledger when [...]

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CNW Junk Drawer: They Tried to Make Me Go to Silicone Rehab

Amy Winehouse has traded needles in the arm for needles in the boobs and lips. (The Blemish)
Rachel Bilson sports Gwyneth Paltrow-style greaseball legs in Flaunt. (Yeeeah!)
James Gandolfini assaulted a paparazzo. Sadly, he later found out that the photog was not, in fact, carrying any nachos on him so it was all for naught. (Anything Hollywood)
Strap [...]

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Lindsay Lohan Is Right. You Heard Us.

Yesterday, Radar released some voicemails from Lindsay Lohan to her mesh shirt-favoring father figure, Michael Lohan. We didn’t post them because they made us real sad in our souls but today Lindsay’s addressing them so fuck it, here they are. A transcript:
“No one cares about me. They don’t, by the way. It’s about how they [...]

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Lindsay Lohan Returns to the Comfort of Cock

And she’s back on the dick. We knew it wouldn’t be very long before Lindsay Lohan was drawn back to the mystical allure of the peen. It’s one of her many, many addictions. That Sam Ronson poon? That was just an experiment. Plus, we haven’t exactly seen proof that Sam possesses an actual vagina. For [...]

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Lindsay Lohan, Rug Lunch Muncher

We’ve seen Lindsay Lohan do a lot of things. Show her titties when she’s not getting paid. Not show her titties when she is getting paid. Get paid for covering other people’s titties in sparkly pasties. But for the life of us we cannot remember ever seeing this before. It’s Lindsay Lohan eating! We were [...]

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Lindsay Lohan’s Side Boob Better than Lindsay Lohan’s No Boob

Usually when actresses get all made up and take off various pieces of clothing to pose all pretty for a magazine, it’s because they’ve got something to sell. A new movie coming out. A new season of their TV show is about to start. They just wrote a book about their harrowing journey out of [...]

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Dear Lindsay, I’m in a Magazine! Love, Daddy

How is it that Michael Lohan continues to shock us? We know he’s the creepiest creep who ever creeped among creepazoids, yet every time he takes his creepiness a step further we’re all, “WTF, Mike?” Today’s creepy goings-on involve Michael writing a personal letter to Lindsay—and publishing it in In Touch. According to Contact Music:
His [...]

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Michael Lohan Is a Really Great Dad

You’ve got to hand it to Michael Lohan; it takes another-level type douchebag to make Dina Lohan look like the sensible parent. But even though Dina is the next incarnation of Jaid Barrymore, she can always count on Michael threatening to kidnap their kids to make her look good less abhorrent. According to The San [...]

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