ï Keira Knightley was attacked by a wandering expletive-spewer and lived to tell the tale. (Yeeeah!)

ï Being the concubine of Marilyn Manson, Evan Rachel Wood is used to standing next to undead ghouls, so she looks right at home beside Mickey Rourke. (CelebWarship)

ï Hilary Swank will gain 30 pounds for a movie role. Which is cool because we also plan on gaining 30 pounds, basically because Totino's Pizza Rolls are on sale at Safeway. Solidarity! (Daily Stab)

ï Ay oh! Oh ay! Whaddaya doin', Samanter? It's Alyssa Milano naked! (Mr. Skin)

ï Another male has willingly placed his wango inside of Star Jones. (Holy Taco)

ï Daniel Radcliffe admits when he was a teen, his magic wand found its way into a cougar's Hairy Pooter. (Derek Hail)

ï Holly Madison take a carefree swing, and tosses out some beav. (Drunken Stepfather)

ï Lacey Chabert gives us a party of two. (Fatback)

ï Katie Holmes has the knees of a three dollar hooker. Or that girl Tammy who was voted "friendliest" in tenth grade. (Cityrag)

Actress Keira Knightley was happy to film a sex scene for her new movie "The Edge of Love," even though her mother wrote the naked romp.

Knightley's mom, Sharman Macdonald, penned the movie's screenplay. She also served as a producer on the project.

Knightley insists that knowing her mother is capable of writing about steamy clinches didn't faze her and she was happy to strip off wherever necessary.

She says, "She dared to put a sex scene in it. It didn't worry me that my mother knows what sex is.

"Come to think of it, I was found under an apple tree. My mother is a virgin. I had no hissy fits when she presented me with the scene."

From what we know of Keira "Tits" Knightley, we're guessing that she and her mom don't exactly have an uptight relationship. We wouldn't be surprised if Keira's bedtime stories as a tot weren't The Little Engine That Could and Goodnight Moon but The Story of O and the collected works Henry Miller.


Knightley gets knude at MrSkin.com.

Keira Knightley didn’t hesitate when she was asked to bare her breasts in new movie The Edge Of Love – because she believes sex scenes are more believable when performed by naked actors.

The 23-year-old actress has no qualms about appearing in the buff, insisting nudity has even become a habit of hers.

She tells People magazine, “I always bare my breasts. It’s not like it’s only in this film!”

So when Edge Of Love filmmaker John Maybury requested her to remove her bra, she was happy to oblige: “I said, ‘All right then.’

“It was very simple. It was a sex scene and I never like them when they’ve got bras on.”

This is exciting and all, but we get the impression that The Edge of Love can’t possibly live up to our lofty expectations. It stars Keira Knightley and Sienna Miller. And they do it! In our minds we’re pretty much imagining a Misty Mundae movie, with Keira and Sienna completely naked and bumping boobies in the Welsh countryside for roughly 89% of the film. But then we watched the trailer. It’s a bit more Jane Austen with Wellies than Jesse Jane. Maybe next time, girls.

See Tits Knightley’s namesake body parts at MrSkin.com.

Keira Knightley clashed with her screenwriter mother Sharman MacDonald over their forthcoming movie The Edge Of Love – because the actress refused to play the part her mum had specifically written for her.

Macdonald told her daughter she had penned the role of Caitlin Thomas just for her in the upcoming film about Welsh poet Dylan Thomas – but the 23-year-old had other ideas.

Macdonald recalls, "I said, 'You're playing Caitlin,' and she said, 'No, I like Vera.'"

As a result, the part of Vera Phillips, one of the Welsh poet's love interests, was transformed – to Knightley's liking. Macdonald adds: "She wasn't even a singer until Keira decided to play her."

Similarly, we hear that Asia Argento's role in Trauma was originally written to be a chaste young nun until Asia told her father, the director, "Needs more titties, pops." Nice work, ladies. Next time try to incorporate some giant raptor battles while you're at it.

Keizza gets so very naked at MrSkin.com. Have a peep.

"They painted my tits on me for the films, which is extraordinary because it's kind of a dying art form – in the past, they used to have whole sections of the studios devoted to bosom make-up. And I loved it, completely loved it. Because it was the first time in my life I had big tits, and I didn't even need surgery.î

Keira might want to take note: allegedly, Amy Winehouse is looking to launch a line of makeup. Reports The Sun:

ìShe wants to bring out a range of cosmetics and fashion products. There could be hairspray, head scarves, liquid eyeliner, perfume. All the things that are distinctive of her look.î

Hopefully, Winehouse's cosmetics line will be out in time for Keira's next major motion picture. And in place of carefully contoured cleavage stripes, she will sport winged black Ronettes liner shooting out of each boob, and a single chola jailbird tear leaking out of one nipple.

Keira bares all at MrSkin.com.

Ellen: Why do you love posing nude?

Keira: I donít know. People ask and I just say yes.

Ellen: You just say ok?

Keira: Yeah, I will learn to say no. At the moment, my friends actually have bets going on that I canít actually do a photo shoot keeping my clothes on . . . I think I find it vaguely liberating, which I hope I donít become a nudist.

Ellen: Youíre on your way.

Keira: I am, Iím on my way.

Well, seeing how Keira's in corsets in 92% of her films, it's easy to understand why she'd be so eager to let her torso fly free. Though we can't really get behind the Clockwork Orange-meets-Cabaret-meets-Taco's-version-of-"Puttin' on the Ritz" look of this cover. She's kind of reminiscent of Freddie Mercury. Only Freddie had bigger cans.

Tons of Keira kajooblies are available for your inspection at MrSkin.com.

It was a chilly night in Greenwich Village on Monday for Chanel's premiere of "Atonement." But its British stars heated up the red carpet with a surprisingly detailed behind-the-scenes description of their steamy sex scene.

"Any funny stories, any anecdotes?" James McAvoy (who made his reputation in 2006's "Last King of Scotland") mused aloud. "Lots … being there while Keira Knightley was being told to [bleep] me off was a high point."

Excuse me? And did she?

"No, of course not."

I asked director Joe Wright if he ever delivered such a command. "Absolutely no comment," he said outside the Cinema Society screening. "I can't believe he told you that!"

Fortunately, Keira was able to sort it out for us.

"It was the sex scene, which I have to say I think is a really good sex scene," she told me. "But it was such a specific thing and it had to be so erotic that we did just say to Joe, 'Come on, talk us through it.'"

And compared to what Wright told the audience before the screening, that was actually one of the cleaner stories of the evening.

This all sounds very odd to us, as Atonement is set in 1935 and we're pretty sure that blowjobs weren't even invented until about 1962, most likely by Keith Richards. Does no one care about historical accuracy in film anymore?


See Keira naked for real at MrSkin.com.

"The bath scene is very erotic. There's been a lot of talk about it and I suppose the whole lesbian mÈnage-a-trois thing is great publicity for the film. Keira plays the temptress and I play a more reserved person. The setting in the Welsh hills couldn't be more sensual or entrancing."

One writer, two dames, possible tribadism. So it's like Henry and June, only with rolling green hills and sea mist and even funnier accents.

KK gets nakey for MrSkin.com.

And Sienna does too, you betcha.

ï Jessica Simpson brings back the Daisy Dukes. Or maybe the Dazzy Duks. Whatever. (Drunken Stepfather)

ï This is what Kid Rock bitchslapped Tommy Lee over. (Hollywood Tuna)

ï Mary-Louise Parker pulls a Madonna. And we don't mean dry-humping Vanilla Ice. (The Blemish)

ï Dave Grohl says that Paris is a "total, raging, disgusting, rich, lazy party slut." In similar news, Dave Grohl claims that "bacon tastes real good" and "water is wet". (Celebitchy)

ï Christina Aguilera's baby will never go hungry. (Derek Hail)

ï Sting probably had sex with these hookers. But the question remains: did he have sex with them for ten hours straight? (IDLYITW)

ï Keira Knightley is a big fat sloppy gross lardy gigantic moo cow. (Celeb Warship)