CAMERON DIAZ has been spotted on a date with Speed star KEANU REEVES. The couple dined together at a secluded restaurant in Los Angeles before heading off to a cinema until the early hours.

An onlooker at low-key eatery the Whisper Lounge in Los Angeles said of Cameron and Keanu: “They looked very cozy. Cameron was stuffing her burger in her mouth and playing up the fact that she has that wide mouth. Keanu was laughing – it was strange to see him giggling like that as he’s regarded as a bit serious.”

Well, we thought this sounded pretty innocent and friendly until we got to the burger part. You don’t attempt a move like cramming an entire cheeseburger into your maw unless you mean business. Sex business. It’s the equivalent of eating an entire pizza or crushing a beer can on your head. Or setting your farts on fire, a little move I like to call The Panty Obliterator.

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In addition to the DNA test, Sala is seeking child support of $150,000 per month, retroactive to June 1988, as well as $3 million per month in spousal support retroactive to November 2006.

A Los Angeles spokesperson for Reeves issued a statement last night denying her allegations. "Karen Sala's allegations are completely false and absurd. Mr. Reeves has no knowledge of who she is," Cheryl Maisel said in a statement.

It would be pretty amazing to get spousal support from someone to whom you have never been married and child support for your offspring who are age 20 to 25. Good thing Sala is acting as her own lawyer. "Your honorable, I abject! Mr. Reeves is libelous for all my children. He also fathered my rat terrier, Martin, and the pepper plants in my neighbor's backyard. You're misfeeding the witness. Class dismissed!"

Jordan wants Angelina Jolie to play her in a film of her life.

The British model and TV star, real name Katie Price, thinks the stunning actress would be the perfect choice to portray her on the big screen.

She also has a specific leading man in mind to play husband Peter Andre.

Jordan said: "I do really want to do a film about my life. I'm thinking Angelina Jolie could be me and Keanu Reeves for Pete."

You know, we think that Jordan's casting decisions are so terrible that we're going to continue on with our idea of populating a Jordan/Peter Andre biopic with members of the animal kingdom. We think a badger could possibly capture the essence of Peter, as long as that badger waxed his chest and studied Derek Zoolander's Blue Steel really, really hard. Does the Academy give out Oscars for casting? Because we think we've pretty much got that award in the bag.

ï Mickey Rourke takes his new face out to ogle some gay stripper's grape-smugglers. (Yeeeah!)

ï Keanu Reeves is seeing China Chow. You're also seeing China Chow. Seeing her topless, that is. In related news, China Chow is not kibble for Chinese people that comes in a 15 lb bag. Who knew? (Taxi Driver)

ï Jennifer Lopez and Unfrozen Caveman Husband take their spawn out for some fresh air. (Faded Youth)

ï Forget danceoffs; Mel B is getting her revenge on Eddie Murphy with an album called Beverly Hills Cock. That sounds nice. (Daily Stab)

ï The many toups of Jeremy Piven. (Cityrag)

ï Nicole Richie gets her Mrs. Roper on. (Seriously OMG WTF?!)

ï Gisele Bundchen speaks highly of beau Tom Brady; says he "doesn't have a bad bone in his body." That's right, because his bad bone is in YOUR body. Swish! (CelebWarship)

ï Boil some water and get some clean sheets–Britney's on her way to Lousiana to be there for Jamie-Lynn's birthin'! Wait a minute, we're talking about Spearses. Boil some Diet Mountain Dew and get some dirty sheets! (The Hollywood Gossip)

ï Puffy Dangle Doobie Diddle waxes his nutbag. It is imperative that we know this. (The Blemish)

ï Kate Moss dons a tasteful, maternal see-through dress to take her daughter for a stroll. (Flisted)

ï Anne Hathaway is all, "there once was a man from Nantucket." (WENN)

Sparks are flying between Winona Ryder and Keanu Reeves on the set of the drama The Private Lives of Pippa Lee.

Star has learned that the two iconic stars have been spending lots of time in each otherís trailers.

ìThey are also always hugging on the set,î says a source. ìThe chemistry is really electric.î

Theyíve gotten so close that during a break in filming in Connecticut, Winona, 36, relaxed with Keanu, 43, at his Manhattan pad.

It's like all the romantic fantasies we had in our heads circa 1987 have finally come to fruition. Now if only Kirk Cameron and Meredith Salenger would discover their love for one another, our matchmaking dreams of yore would be complete. Quick, let's go tell the Popples!

Needing Noni nudes? Fulfill your every desire at MrSkin.com.

ï No, my first name ain't baby. It's Janet. Miss Rackson if you're see-through. (Hollywood Tuna)

ï Lindsay Lohan goes back to red, lays off the burnt umber fake bake, approaches former Mean Girls-era loveliness. (Allie Is Wired)

ï Keanu Reeves and Parker Posey. Two great stoners that stone great together. (Lainey Gossip)

ï Perhaps they should head over to the radio station to tear into a box of Scooby Snacks with Ashlee Simpson. (Yeeeah!)

ï Mental wounds not healing. Life's a bitter shame. Julia Roberts is going off the rails on a crazy train.(Cityrag)

ï Hayden Panettiere's mom is "very proud" that her teenage daughter is moving in with 31-year-old Milo Ventimiglia. Awwww. (FemaleFirst)

ï Cruz Beckham, spawn of David and Posh Spice, is a SUPERSTAR. (Bitten and Bound)

ï Kevin Federline's gut threatens to Popozao out of his golf shirt. (Hollywood Backwash)

ï To Paris Hilton, "foreign-looking man with long gray beard" = the path to spiritual enlightenment. (Hollywood Grind)

ï Heidi Klum probes her husband.

ï Which one's cuter?: Mischa Barton with a kitty! Awww! Awwww! Awwwwwwwwww!

ï 50 Cent will let his little boy mock murder people and watch porno, but cussing's where he draws the line.

ï Lindsay Lo-ho and Keanu Reeves might be heading for a shack-up. One can only imagine the stimulating conversations these two have.

ï Nip slip? Bah. Lip slip? Soooo two days ago. Rhona Mitra goes next level with an implant scar slip. Jealous, bitches?

ï Sorry, boys! Elton John is officially off the market!

ï The terrorists will never win when we have freedom on our side! Freedom, and Alyssa Milano's breast.

ï Dear Russell Crowe: PLEASE PUNCH US. WE NEED THE CASH.

ï Scar-Jo and Josh Hartnett (Jo-Ho?) move in together! Eh, it's destined to fail. "Scarlett Hartnett" just sounds so douchey.

ï Fleck's million-pound pits.

ï Annie Hall is porking Ted "Theodore" Logan.

ï Ohhhh, when Keef says Mick has a laughably tiny weenis, that's supposed to be a compliment. We see, we see.

ï Does a rapper sire twelve billion babies and have two wives? Mos Def!

Whoa, dude, it's Keanu at MaleStars.com.