CelebNewsWire» Jim Carrey Archives – CelebNewsWire

Jodie Barks Orders at Beav

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Mon, 04 May 2009 17:09:27 +0000

If there's one thing missing in modern filmmaking, it's muppet companionship. But that wrong is about to be righted thanks to Ace Ventura and Nell. According to IMDb:

Funnyman Jim Carrey could soon be taking orders from Jodie Foster – the actress is in talks to direct his new film The Beaver.

The movie, written by Kyle Killen, is about a man who becomes reliant on his beaver hand puppet for company.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, Steve Carrell, who was previously linked to the leading role, looks set to be replaced by Carrey and Foster is in negotiations to helm the project.

This won't be the first time Jodie's directed beaver. Hi-yoooo.

Dumb & Dumbererer: When Jim Carrey Met 50 Cent

Agent E. — Mon, 19 Jan 2009 18:01:22 +0000

Jim Carrey may pull in millions more per picture than Joaquin Phoenix, but he definitely doesn't share his fellow actor's sense of hip hop adventure. When 50 Cent pulled Jim up on stage during a Sundance party over the weekend, he didn't even bust out an "It is my birthday, I am going to party like it is my birthday, I am going to drink Bacardi brand rum beverage like it is my birthday, and I do not give a fudge that it is not my birthday." Reports the New York Daily News:

Jim Carrey celebrated his 47th birthday with a special present: a once-in-a-lifetime chance to be part of 50 Centís G-Unit entourage.

The comic, along with girlfriend Jenny McCarthy, turned up at vitaminwaterís Sundance house in Park City, Utah, on Saturday to catch the rapperís midnight performance ó and made a beeline to where 50 was performing in the balcony.

ìJim and Jenny were dancing and really getting into the music, so 50 decided to bring him out to the balcony for a special rendition of ëItís Your Birthdayí,î says our spy.

ìWhen Fiddy told the crowd, ëI have a very special guest for youí, everyone was floored because he had just done a duet with Robin Thicke. They thought the surprises were over. Then 50 started singing and Jim appeared, and the crowd just lost it.î

Although Carrey didnít get on the mic, he did lip-synch while busting some í50s-inspired moves. ìJim was bumping and grinding with Lloyd Banks,î our witness reveals, adding, ìIt was pandemonium in the best way.î

Carrey, in town to promote his new flick ìI Love You Phillip Morris,î then retreated to a corner to catch up with Chris Rock. After some friendly banter, Chris took his turn onstage with 50ís crew. Says our spy: ì50 literally stopped in the middle of a song and brought Chris out to hang and dance while he finished his set.î

We love that through a minor typo the writer made Jim seem even more white and out of place than he obviously was. Instead of "50-inspired moves" as in 50 Cent, Jim is described as engaging in "'50s-inspired moves," making us imagine Jim doing the mashed potato and hand jiving to "P.I.M.P"

CNW Junk Drawer: Just Say SheNAE to Pants

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Thu, 15 Jan 2009 17:58:32 +0000

ï Shenae Grimes piles on all her clothes–lace stockings, Jack Sparrow boots, lumberjack shirt–at once. All her clothes except for the pants part. (IDLYITW)

ï Kendra Wilkinson says she sneaked some contraband penis into the Playboy mansion. (Yeeeah!)

ï Victoria Beckham models for Armani skivvies; miraculously does not look like a praying mantis while doing so. (Anything Hollywood)

ï Did Paula Abdul get her schnozz whacked?
(Cityrag)

ï Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey spice up their sex life with provocative dancing. Unfortunately, it's Jim who's sporting the unitard. (Evil Beet)

ï You should probably watch the premiere of The Beast tonight. If you don't, Patrick Swayze will get sad and die. (Seriously OMG WTF)

ï Hey, it's Nicollette Sheridan in her underdrawers. Wouldja lookit that. (Drunken Stepfather)

ï Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake were trapped under the same roof and it didn't even end up in a bloody dance-off. Mature! (Holy Moly)

A Bunch of People Who Have Too Much Damn Money

Agent E. — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 17:16:41 +0000

Most people go to the office, work super hard while their bosses are out playing golf, and instead of heaps of credit and a corner office and huge pay raises they get an FTD teddy bear bouquet as a Christmas bonus. But movie stars aren't like most people. They make a decent flick or two then it's off to A-list land, where no paycheck has fewer than seven zeros and nobody cares if you actually do good work as long as your famous name appears above the title. This is how movie stars get to foist piles of dog shit at the public, call them "blockbusters", and get paid at least 20 mil for the effort. But there are a few stars that the rich man's periodical Forbes thinks need to start earning minimum wage to learn a lesson or two.

1. Nicole Kidman
2. Jennifer Garner
3. Tom Cruise
4. Cameron Diaz
5. Jennifer Lopez
6. Jim Carrey
7. Nicolas Cage
8. Drew Barrymore
9. Will Ferrell
10. Cate Blanchett

Moist of these we understand; what a bunch of turkeys these hacks have turned out (besides the lovely, talented, irreplaceable, poured-from-porcelain Cate Blanchett, of course). But Cameron Diaz? She is worth every single shiny penny. Did you see What Happens in Vegas? That film was a touching tale of how to find love through humility that spoke to every single human being with a beating heart. And you just can't put a price on meaning like that.

Who Wore It Best?

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Mon, 07 Jul 2008 17:31:57 +0000

Both Jenny McCarthy and beau Jim Carrey dazzle in a dare-to-bare, super-sexy one-piece in an inky hue. Jenny keeps it simple with tinted shades and no jewelry, letting her hot mama beach bod take center stage, but Jim's addition of an age-appropriate yet elegant backwards baseball cap and a semi-tucked moose knuckle in lieu of human female breasts edges him over the top into the winner's circle!

Jenny Mac gets very naked at MrSkin.com.

CNW Junk Drawer: "Partying Has Not Come In the Way of Her Parenting"

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Wed, 13 Dec 2006 17:19:57 +0000

ï Tricia Helfer will be ponying up some Battlestar Galactitties in Playboy next month.

ï In the biggest horseshit story of the day, Jen Aniston supposedly partied with the K-Fed. We're trying to picture Jennifer in cornrows and man-shants. Not bad.

ï Perhaps the reason Jen is slumming is because she caught wind of Angelina insinuating that she and Brad had boners for each other while the Pittistons were still involved?

ï Eternal Sunshine of the Thetanless Alpha Clear? Don't be fooled by the rocks that I got, I'm just I'm just Jenny from Teegeeack of the Intergalactic Federation?

ï Evel Knievel vs. Kanye West. Sadly, not a sneak peek of a new episode of Celebrity Boxing.

ï Paris is defending Britney's questionable parenting skills, saying, "She goes home every night to her babies and partying has not come in the way of her parenting." Seriously, duh! She goes out and shows her slopbox and does body shots and THEN she goes home at 4 A.M. to play with the babies. No biggie!

ï Adriana Lima and the Case of the Bikinified Virgin.

ï Take your key and unlock Jordan's heart, and her vagina, conveniently located next door to one another.

ï Sylvester Stallotox takes the blame for starting that whole Richard Gere-assgerbil rumor. Guess we know who to point the finger at for that whole "Danny Wood semen stomach pump" thing.