Tag Archives: Jessica Biel
Justin Timberlake Boinking Jessica Biel—and Everyone Else
If you haven’t realized it yet, Justin Timberlake is the luckiest man in the entire world. He screwed Britney when she was at her peak of hotness. Add to that some of the other girls he’s schtupped: Cameron Diaz, Scarlett Johannson, Jessica Biel. He went from singing with Joey Fat One to making critically acclaimed [...]
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Also tagged celebrity breakups, celebrity hookups, Justin Timberlake
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They’re Bringing the Relationship Back (Yeah?)
Yesterday we reported that Justin Timberlake had departed the lusciously bumpy terrain of Jessica Biel and set sail for the fecund plains of Rihanna town. Weirdly enough, pictures of JT and Biel leaked immediately to the press, showing the couple happy and in love and holding hands. And by that we mean that Jessica, her [...]
He’s Bringing Cheating Back (Yeah)
Once you summit the treacherous yet holy peaks of Jessica Biel’s ass, where do you go? Like the mountain climber in the Price Is Right game, you either win the dinette set, or you plunge off the end to your death. Or, if you’re Justin Timberlake, you find another mountain to scale. Mt. Rihanna. Star [...]
"Boo Hoo, I'm Pretty," Says Jessica Biel
A line we might believe: "I'm just too beautiful to get any good jobs in waste management. Bosses take one look at my perfect face and they don't want to let it get sullied by garbage. Well, except this one guy who wanted me to suck on old banana peels and smear coffee grounds on [...]
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Hey Looky, Jessica Biel's Boobies. In Motion!
Hey turds. Have you forgotten about Jessica Biel nude in Powder Blue? Have you moved on to something else by now, like Hannah Montana-inspired porn? Well, let’s assume that you haven’t passed that threshold just yet and are still able to appreciate life’s simple pleasures, like a huge celebrity showing her tits in a (surely [...]
Justin Timberlake, Tequila Pusher
If you were Jessica Biel's boyfriend, you'd probably cower at her every movement, quake at the thought of her ability to take that sweet, sweet ass away from you, and you'd never ever challenge a single word she said. But since Justin Timberlake is her boyfriend, and he has tasted the sweet nectar of half [...]
Jessica Biel Flosses Her Butt
Apparently celebrities spent their weekend just like we did: holed up at home wearing a face mask, popping Tamiflu, watching CNN. Because they obviously weren't making news over the last two days. So instead of a funny story that we would comment on in a humorous manner, we bring you the Jessica Biel stripper work [...]
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CNW Junk Drawer: Humpotron
Justin Timberlake dry humps Jessica Biel on the Jumbotron. Way to rub it in, dickface. (The Blemish)
Gavin Rossdale allegedly had a 5 year affair with a dude. Everything Gwen, everything Gwen? I don’t think so. (Yeeeah!)
Bonebag Lindsay Lohan goes on Ellen to discuss the finer points of chowing box. (Hollywood Grind)
Helen Mirren [...]
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Also tagged ailing celebs, Britney Spears, celebrity gay rumors, celebrity hookups, celebrity pregnancies, Denise Richards, Ellen DeGeneres, Evan Rachel Wood, Gavin Rossdale, Helen Mirren, Josh Hartnett, Justin Timberlake, Lindsay Lohan, Ryan Seacrest, television
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The Proof Is in the Pontoons: Jessica Biel Nude in Powder Blue
You want Jessica Biel tits? Ohhh ho ho, do we have Jessica Biel tits. And ass. The first caps have emerged from her upcoming stripper movie Powder Blue, which hits limited theaters in New York and L.A. this week and will be released on DVD on June 9th, and they're pretty spectacular. Sure, the strip-club [...]
Biel Peels. For Reals.
Holy shitting mother of crap! Quit your job and drop out of life, bong in hand! Stash the children safely in a well and run into the streets, brandishing a broken wine bottle and screaming "Jessica Biel naked!" It's long been rumored, and now rumors become reality. Big Booty Biel does, in fact, get nude [...]