Tag Archives: Eva Mendes
Eva Mendes: A Slippery Nipply
Nipple slips have become so commonplace that we are about to manufacture and market an entire line of jewelry based on the tit-spigot snafu. All of our lovely brooches will be in the shape of nipples–some pink, some brown, some large, some small–and made with 100% genuine Swarovski crystals. Pin them to your blouse and [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Leg-Spreading and Fetus-Getting
ï Cleava Mendes. (Drunken Stepfather)
ï "Dear Brad Renfro. We came over to fuck you but you were dead. Love, Tiffany and Amber." Rest in peace, Brad. (Fatback and Collards)
ï We want to "LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!!!", honestly we do, but we just can't when she keeps flipping us her outer labes. (Taxi Driver)
ï [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged ailing celebs, Alessandra Ambrosio, boobs, Brad Renfro, Britney Spears, celebrity deaths, celebrity nudity, celebrity pregnancies, drugs, Halle Berry, Jenna Jameson, Jennifer Garner, Rihanna, Scientology, see-through shots, Tom Cruise, Zac Efron
Leave a comment
Eva Mendes Ponies Up Seat-a for PETA
Apparently, Eva Mendes would rather go naked than wear fur. We wonder if Eva is aware that there are more than just two options. One can go naked, or one could wear fur, OR one could don a Rowdy Roddy Piper costume, or a Hazmat suit, or a Gordon Gartrell shirt, or an adult diaper [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Matt n' Mandy, Sittin' in a Tree
ï Is our sweet angel Mandy Moore getting Binged? Oh Christ, NO! (Yeeeah!)
ï Our favorite opiate connoisseur, Porky Petey Dough-erty, has returned to form. Now with video! (Drunken Stepfather)
ï And Pete's ex, Kate Moss, sports some really sharp needles of her own. (Taxi Driver)
ï Jerry O'Connell has hot wife; poor self-esteem. [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged advertisements, booze, celebrity arrests, celebrity hookups, drugs, Jerry O'Connell, Jessica Simpson, Josh Hartnett, Leelee Sobieski, Mandy Moore, Matthew Perry, Pete Doherty, Rebecca De Mornay, Rebecca Romijn, Rihanna, see-through shots, Shia LaBeouf
Leave a comment
Eva Mendes Likes Constant Nudity, Except for in the Flickers
The much-maligned Eva Longoria and her mouth full of TMI seem to have disappeared off the radar, post-wedding. But cut off one of the seven heads of the sexy-talkin', Eva-named hydra, and another sexy-talkin', Eva-named head will grow in its place, even stronger than the one preceding it. Well, maybe not stronger, but definitely less [...]
Eva Mendes, Shirtless to the Max(im)
The movie We Own the Night just opened in theaters. It's a harrowing drama about suicide, murder, and the Russian mafia (hey, just like Eastern Promises!). And what better way to celebrate such tense tragedy than by losing your laundry and humping a wall for Maxim? Oh, Eva Mendes, you are a master of marketing. [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Spears n' Jeers
ï Brit can visit her kids; might be headed back to rehab. In related news, Kevin Federline showed up to court wearing an eyepatch. Because he's a responsible p-arrrrrrrrrrr-ent. (GlossLip)
ï George Takei now has his own asteroid. His own tight, firm, assteroid. (IMDb)
ï Anakin Skywalker still throwing it into Rachel Bilson. But [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged ailing celebs, Angelina Jolie, Britney Spears, celebrity hookups, celebrity offspring, celebrity pregnancies, celebs in rehab, George Takei, Hayden Christensen, Isaac Hanson, Jennifer Aniston, Jennifer Lopez, Jordan, Kevin Federline, magazines, Rachel Bilson
1 Comment
CNW Junk Drawer: "Did Not Do Drugs They're Not Mine"
ï Lindsay tells Billy Bush, "Yes. I am innocent… did not do drugs they're not mine." Well, technically the drugs they found weren't "done" yet because they were in her pocket. So . . . yeah! Innocent! (TMZ)
ï Lily Allen does not suffer Courtney Loves gladly. (Celeb Warship)
ï Eva Mendes sends Jane [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged celebrity arrests, celebrity nudity, celebs posing for Playboy, Courtney Love, drugs, Hilary Duff, Jennifer Garner, Kim Kardashian, Lily Allen, Lindsay Lohan, magazines, Penelope Cruz, Rihanna, underwear
Leave a comment
Celebrity Bikini Round-Up
Christ on a cross, there are so many pictures of female celebrities in bikinis floating around today, we don't even know what to do with ourselves today. Aside from "playing" with ourselves, but that's generally frowned upon in the workplace, which we found out when we were working the night shift at the medical examiner's [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged celebs in bikinis, Hayden Panettiere, Hilary Swank, Mariah Carey
Leave a comment
CNW Junk Drawer: Outrageous and Delusional
ï If Christina Aguilera isn't pregnant in her uterus, then she's definitely carrying a set of twins in her cans. Whooo-eeee! (Drunken Stepfather)
ï I know why the caged Tom Sizemore sings. Because meth makes you chipper. (FemaleFirst)
ï What will Paris do, post-jail? Here are some fine ideas on life after incarceration. (Yeeeah!)
ï [...]
Posted in Uncategorized
Also tagged celebrity pregnancies, Christina Aguilera, Clay Aiken, Dina Lohan, drugs, jail, Jessica Biel, Justin Timberlake, Lindsay Lohan, movies, Paris Hilton, Scientology, Tom Cruise, Tom Sizemore
Leave a comment