CelebNewsWire» Eva Amurri Archives – CelebNewsWire

Eva Amurri Is Generous; Nude

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Mon, 19 Oct 2009 17:53:37 +0000

Californication stars the always interesting David Duchovny, which is good. Then again, every time we hear the show mentioned, we get the Red Hot Chili Peppers stuck in our heads. That is bad. Thus, our feelings towards the show were neutral until Eva Amurri came along and captured our hearts like a plucky red-haired orphan with a well-intentioned shaggy dog. A shaggy dog and enormous, stunning, pendulous, natural boobs the size of cannonballs. It’s a hard knocker life. Two mammos, two mammos, I love ya, two mammos. You’re never fully dressed without a bra. And etc.

Why yes, there are pictures after the cut, thanks for asking!

Eva, who gets her very comely assets from her equally enchanting mother, Susan Sarandon, has a few more weeks left in her Californication residency, so if you don’t watch, you’re pretty stupid. Oh, and don’t give us that “waahhh, I don’t have caaaaable” horse feathers. Every Monday, Mr Skin has the pics and clips up first FREE for 24 hours. The government might be giving you $8000 for buying a house, but Mr. Skin is giving you colossal yabbos. It’s up to you to search your soul and decide which you’d rather have.

CNW Junk Drawer: Porthart, We Hardly Knew Ye

Inspector S. (CNW Admin) — Thu, 25 Sep 2008 18:01:42 +0000

ï Natalie Portman and Devendra Banhart break up. Perhaps she woke up and realized, "I'm Natalie Portman. He's a hirsute twee gypsy who sings like a lamb with a barbed dildo up its butthole." (Celebrity Wonder)

ï Right now, Brad and Angelina's adopted kids are looking around their filthy French chateau and thinking, "Screw this, man, there were fewer flies back in Ethiopia, man." (CelebWarship)

ï Kirk Cameron will NOT kiss any woman other than his wife onscreen; WILL star in a sitcom in which his best friend is called "Boner". (Holy Taco)

ï Susan Sarandon enjoyed beating the shit out of daughter Eva Amurri. For a movie! For a movie! (Daily Stab)

ï Dear Kim Kardashian: God would not have dealt you that colossal can and made you mambo on Dancing with the Stars if He didn't want you to shake it like a bottle of salad dressing. Wake up, Kim! Look alive! (F-listed)

ï The Girls Next Door: the truth comes out. You mean three large-breasted blondes in their twenties AREN'T banging an octogenarian? (Pop on the Pop)

ï Leighton Meester admits she was born in the slammer. (The Hollywood Gossip)

ï Top 5 Network TV Nude Scenes! (Mr. Skin)

ï It was mystical, magical water, and not a penis, that got Nicole Kidman pregnant. (The Blemish)

Eva Amurri to Get Asexy

Agent E. — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 17:55:51 +0000

Susan Sarandon is a foxy old babe, right? And babes beget babes, so naturally you want to see Susan's daughter, Eva Amurri (who was really hot and badass in Saved!), doing the things that made Momma famous. Like getting all naked and lesbo with Catherine Deneuve on camera. Hey, Cathy's still really hot. Well, that might not happen anytime soon, but Eva does have a couple sex scenes in her new movie. Rush & Molloy report:

Susan Sarandon might be squirming in her seat during the flick "The Education of Charlie Banks" Friday at the Tribeca Film Fest. Daughter Eva Amurri has two sex scenes in the movie, about a young woman caught between her boyfriend and a visitor with a sinister past. "Both are exciting to watch," Amurri told us. "In one of them, I got to wear a garter belt, which is my fantasy come true – ever since my prom dress."

There's no mention of nudity, so we'll have to wait and see. Oh, and the best (and by best we mean worst) part? "It's Limp Bizkit rocker Fred Durst's directorial debut." So even if Eva is stark naked standing in front of the camera for fifteen minutes straight in great lighting there's a chance that her male costar will be requesting the she touch his balls and his ass for the better part of the movie.

Get familiar with Eva at MrSkin.com.