ï Mickey Rourke takes his new face out to ogle some gay stripper's grape-smugglers. (Yeeeah!)

ï Keanu Reeves is seeing China Chow. You're also seeing China Chow. Seeing her topless, that is. In related news, China Chow is not kibble for Chinese people that comes in a 15 lb bag. Who knew? (Taxi Driver)

ï Jennifer Lopez and Unfrozen Caveman Husband take their spawn out for some fresh air. (Faded Youth)

ï Forget danceoffs; Mel B is getting her revenge on Eddie Murphy with an album called Beverly Hills Cock. That sounds nice. (Daily Stab)

ï The many toups of Jeremy Piven. (Cityrag)

ï Nicole Richie gets her Mrs. Roper on. (Seriously OMG WTF?!)

ï Gisele Bundchen speaks highly of beau Tom Brady; says he "doesn't have a bad bone in his body." That's right, because his bad bone is in YOUR body. Swish! (CelebWarship)

ï Boil some water and get some clean sheets–Britney's on her way to Lousiana to be there for Jamie-Lynn's birthin'! Wait a minute, we're talking about Spearses. Boil some Diet Mountain Dew and get some dirty sheets! (The Hollywood Gossip)

ï Puffy Dangle Doobie Diddle waxes his nutbag. It is imperative that we know this. (The Blemish)

ï Kate Moss dons a tasteful, maternal see-through dress to take her daughter for a stroll. (Flisted)

ï Anne Hathaway is all, "there once was a man from Nantucket." (WENN)