Tag Archives: celebrity hookups
Gerard Butler Plants Scottish Flag in Jessica Simpson’s Soil
The allure of Gerard Butler is a mystery to us. He has a face like an old boxing glove and seems like the poor man’s Russell Crowe (who’s the poor man’s Mel Gibson, who’s the poor man’s Yahoo Serious), yet he pulls more tail than your bratty toddler at a pet shop. And the tail [...]
Balcony Day Continues!
We’ve had Sienna Miller topless on a balcony. Today we saw Lily Allen topless on a balcony. And now we’re seeing Katy Perry . . . not topless on a balcony. Hmmmm. This has something to do with her being American, right? It looks like her current chimney sweep, Russell Brand, would like to screw [...]
Well, Balthazar Getty Has a Type
Embattled, faux-lipped firecrotch Lindsay Lohan desperately needs an image makeover. The only jobs of note she’s had recently are designing spangled pasties and tan spackle. So what better way to endear herself to the public than feeling up a known adulterer from a popular television drama? People reports:
Lindsay Lohan [was spotted] arriving at West Hollywood [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Up, Up and Away in My Dad’s Beautiful Mylar Stormchasing Balloon
Balloon Boy and his non-airborne brethren have a (c)rap video about avoiding “pussification”. Hey, they’re better than the Beastie Boys. (YouTube)
Balloon Boy also totally busted his fame-fellating parents by saying “You said we did this for the show.” Hahaha. (Celebitchy)
And after that, Balloon Boy barfed twice on live TV. The end. (Dlisted)
Amy Winehouse has allegedly [...]
John’s the Mayer of Anistontown Once Again
The tabloids’ concern with the tumbleweeds and howling coyote sounds in Jennifer Aniston’s womb has reached fever pitch. They desperately want to pair her with any male-ish object in her wake, from Bradley Cooper to Gerard Butler to a doric column in the front of First Federal Bank. And now, according to People, she’s pogoing [...]
She Kissed a Brand and He Liked It
Russell Brand’s heart is like a cantering stallion in the wild. It is a beautiful, untamed creature that refuses to bend to your will or be reined. Try to put a saddle on it and you may very well be kicked in the groin. And with a toss of his shimmering mane, he gallops freely [...]
He’s Bringing Cheating Back (Yeah)
Once you summit the treacherous yet holy peaks of Jessica Biel’s ass, where do you go? Like the mountain climber in the Price Is Right game, you either win the dinette set, or you plunge off the end to your death. Or, if you’re Justin Timberlake, you find another mountain to scale. Mt. Rihanna. Star [...]
Welcome, Segalny and Kevden.
Mismatched couples have been the stuff of cinematic legend for years. Just look at Beauty and the Beast. Or Last Tango in Paris. But usually, Hollywood matchups make sense. Brangelina makes sense. Jenny McCarthy and Jim Carrey makes sense. But there are two new couples that leave us scratching our heads and pulling your finger. [...]
Schneider Would Not Be Cool With This
Many of you youngsters probably do not remember the excellent televised ode to single motherhood and moustachioed building supers, One Day at a Time, so you don’t remember Mackenzie Phillips as Julie Cooper. Mackenzie is the half sister of Bijou Phillips and the daughter of John Phillips, aka Papa John from the Mamas and the [...]
Today’s Shocker: Jack Black Is Dirty
We’ve never put much thought into the sexual life of Kathy Griffin. We think she might have been married once, but we’re not really sure. We generally just assumed that instead of sex she just has six buff gay men in boy shorts tickle her with feathers and tell her she’s fierce. But apparently once [...]