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Tag Archives: Cate Blanchett

A Bunch of People Who Have Too Much Damn Money

Most people go to the office, work super hard while their bosses are out playing golf, and instead of heaps of credit and a corner office and huge pay raises they get an FTD teddy bear bouquet as a Christmas bonus. But movie stars aren't like most people. They make a decent flick or two [...]

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The Golden Age of Cate Blanchett's Bazooms

Cate Blanchett is a woman of style, grace, dignity, and class, one of the few ladies worthy of portraying a queen. But that doesn't mean that she has to cover herself in burlap and eschew showering. No, so is also very, very pretty. And very, very pretty people generally like you to know that they [...]

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Famous Ladies Had Penises in Their Vaginas; Babies Ensued

Anyone who is not a female above age thirty can just stop reading this right now, because we're about to delve into the world of babies. It's going to be babies, babies, babies around the CNW parts until every last one of you wants to scrape out your lady innards with a rusty hanger. We [...]

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Cate Blanchett Fools Us with Stunt Butt

That Cate Blanchett, she's such a trickster. She's all like, "Hey guys, look at my butt. Isn't it fabulous. I make a damn sexy queen, right? Look at my ass!" Then the next minute she starts laughing in your face, saying, "Haha, loser, that's not my bum. It's that girl's over there. I sure fooled [...]

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Toronto International Film Festival 2007 Features Young People Fucking

For a couple of years now, we've been hounding the powers that be at the Toronto International Film Festival to add a subtitle to their festival's name. We've sent letters, personalized cupcakes, talking parrots, whatever we could think of. But to no avail. They will not even consider changing the name to the Toronto International [...]

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Cate Blanchett Showsitt

If you are someone who frequents these pages, you're surely familiar with our assertion that the only two celebrities beyond the scope of our mocking are Mandy Moore and Cate Blanchett. And Mandy's not even bulletproof–she actually let Zach Braff put his liver lips all over her person, and if that's not grounds for derision, [...]

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