Tag Archives: BeyoncÈ Knowles
Beyonce Is 4 Dummies
It's obvious that some things will make you dumb. Doing meth for example. Although, in that case you were probably pretty fucking stupid to begin with. Also, watching The Hills probably kills off a good number of brain cells. But listening to Beyonce? Really? Is there some sort of hidden correlation between learning how to [...]
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All the Single Boobies, All the Single Boobies
While watching the Oscars on Sunday night, we tried to keep our eyes open, scanning swooping necklines for a peek of areola. Honestly, we tried our best. We were on high alert whenever Evan Rachel Wood or Sarah Jessica Parker appeared before the camera. But we also admit that we were well into our cups [...]
Beyonce Remembers Body Glitter; Forgets Mach III
Oh, Beyonce. There are so many directions we could go here.
A. I Am . . . Sasha Fur-ce
B. Hirsuteylicious
C. "All the single bladies! All the single bladies!"
D. "Ring the alarm/I grew this hair out too long/But I'll be damned if I get a Schick in my underarm"
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This Day in Ridiculous Celebrity Eyewear
Remember Kanye West's dumbass sunglasses? The ones that must've brought back fond memories of peeping through Venetian blinds at a naked neighbor lady because why the fuck else would he wear something so idiotic? Those don't look so stupid now, do they? Thanks, BeyoncÈ. But we're a bit concerned about you, darling. You've basically put [...]
We Knowles Her as Sasha Fierce
We generally don't know our Diddy from our P. Daddy from our Puffy from our Sean Combs, so it sucks to have another musical performer doing the name change thing. The Artist Formerly Known As Beyonce will now be called Sasha Fierce for her new album. True, that sounds like the drag alter ego of [...]
BeyoncÈ Has a Lot of Really Expensive Hair
You may think you have a large collection of, say, Jabba the Hut figurines or David Beckham's discarded Kleenex, but no matter what it is you're hoarding, BeyoncÈ has you beat. Reports In Touch (via Celebitchy):
BeyoncÈ is guaranteed to always have the coolest hairstyle – she keeps a climate-controlled closet stocked with finely crafted hairpieces. [...]
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Jay-Z, Mariah Carey Prepare for the Inevitable
When your worldly assets amount to about $87, a cupboard full of Rice-a-Roni, and some broken IKEA furniture, it's hard to understand the need for a pre-nup, but celebrities aren't like us; the poorer of the pair (read: still richer than you'll ever dream of being) usually gets a pretty sweet salary from the deal. [...]
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Also tagged celeb engagements/weddings, Jay-Z, Mariah Carey, Nick Cannon
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B to the Izz-A B to the Izz-Y
We know that people have babies. The reason life continues is because penises are inserted into vaginas and then big masses of tissue and organs and skin and hair and fingernails called babies come out of said vaginas. This is how the world works. But can celebrities please take a break from the baby making [...]
CNW Junk Drawer: Pregnant. Pregnant in Bikini. Not Pregnant in Bikini.
ï Beyonce still not talking on the wedding rumors, but is she also gestating Hova Jr.? (Celebitchy)
ï Eva Herzigova is definitely pregnant. You can tell because of the giant baby inside her belly. And the naked breasts, gravid with lactocity. (Drunken Stepfather)
ï Also pregnant and half naked? Tori Spelling in a bikini. [...]
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Also tagged Camilla Belle, celeb engagements/weddings, celebrity gay rumors, celebrity nudity, celebrity pregnancies, celebs in bikinis, Eva Herzigova, frivolous lawsuits, Jay-Z, Johnny Depp, Kate Bosworth, Maria Sharapova, Naomi Campbell, Rob Lowe, Sophie Monk, Toni Braxton, Tori Spelling, Vanessa Paradis
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BeyoncÈ Takes a FiancÈ
BeyoncÈ: "Jigga, I'm sick of this little Rihanna stealing all my thunder. I know I haven't had an album out in a while, but that shouldn't stop the entire world from worshiping me every single second of every day. Do they see the booty? Does Rihanna have this booty? I don't think so. All she's [...]