Tag Archives: announcements
CNW Turns Two!
Tomorrow marks the day that we gushed forth from the womb into this madcap, crazy world of ours. Come, take our hand, and join us, won't you, in celebrating our twoth birthday. It's been a wild year, with us taking our first steps, uttering our first word ("firecrotch") and taking those first few tentative stabs [...]
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Spears-a-rama–A Britney Round-up
Britney Spears is having a baby girl. Except that maybe she's still not pregnant. And she's going to announce it today. Except that maybe she won't give her rumored press conference because she's too busy checking Kevin's pants pockets for strippers' phone numbers and used condoms (you know he's nasty enough to carry that shit [...]
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Also tagged Britney Spears, celebrity pregnancies, Kevin Federline
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Happy 1000th Post, Us!
This is our 1000th post. In case your were wondering, 80 posts out of the thousand were about Paris Hilton, and 78 were about Britney Spears. Although we only wrote 6 stories about Fergie from the Black Eyed Peas, she sent us this nice cake in honor of our milestone. Thanks, Ferg!
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Pubic Service Announcement
If, like Taryn Manning, you are a person of a certain level of fame and wealth with a very flat stomach, you're going to want to show it off. However, there are certain levels of acceptable belly baring. There's The Hint of Innocence Soon Lost, then there's the Naughty Lady, The Underaged Trollop, The Gwen [...]
We Look Like a Monkey, and We Smell Like One Too
Hey, everyone! CelebNewsWire turns one today! We'd like to thank you for being there for us through it all. The teething, the colic, the endless dirtying of our diapers, the first smile, the time we rolled over onto our stomachs for the first time (to receive a hearty rogering from Tom Sizemore) . . . [...]
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CNW Email! No Foolin'!
Hey, champ, guess what? We have an email address now! Yes indeed, we're officially part of the 1990s. Pretty soon we'll even be trading up from our dial-up connection and Radio Shack TRS-80. Seen a celeb acting like a real d-bag? Heard some particularly salacious gossip about a superstar? Email us at tips@celebnewswire.com, but don't [...]
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