Moms are so embarrassing when you’re 12. During Thanksgiving dinner, they loudly ask you if you’ve started your period yet. They chaperone your spring fling dance and do the Roger Rabbit. They mention your childhood bed wetting problem in front of your crush. But all this pales in comparison to the anguish suffered by the daughters of Shauna Sand every day. Worrying about your mom wearing sweatpants to the store is one thing, dealing with your mom’s sewn-on, Raggedy Ann style nipple hopping out of its crocheted tit hammock while you’re in the seat next to her is a whole ‘nother ball of surgical tape.
Abandon all hope, ye who enter the NSFW cut.
Down by the river that flows by the coal yards
Stands wooden houses with shutters torn down
There lives a girl everybody calls Patches
Patches, my darling of old shantytown.
Grab your needle and thread and sew a nipple onto our Facebook page!
3 Comments
If I was that kid, I would be seriously entertaining the thought of getting myself emancipated, taking all the money I can get my hands on and changing my name before anything else embarassing happens. That porn that ‘leaked’ is a warning sign of bad things to come, guys. This will not end well.
I feel for the kids. They can’t help what their mom is. Better run when you can.
OMG @ the full shauna sand leaked sex tape – ShaunaSandExposed.com