Scarlett JohASSon: Vanity Fair Comes Through

A couple of months ago, we told you about Rachel McAdams storming off the set of a Vanity Fair cover shoot because it required her to show tasteful nudity-but-not-really-nudity. A preview of said cover was revealed today, and while there is nary a Rachel to be seen, there’s something even better: Scarlett Johansson flanks. Coincidentally, we had a big bowl of those for breakfast.

Oh, we should have probably warned you that this picture is NSFW, but look how elegant! Look how glamorous! Look how old creepy Botoxy Tom Ford is leaning in to catch a desperate whiff of youth!

Normally we’d get a little pouty because what everyone really wants to see of Scarlett’s she’s keeping covered. But we are not ones to look a gift ass in the mouth, and it’s pretty delightful to anticipate a picture due to the possibility of a Rachel McAdams snoob and end up with half a Knightley tit and a Scarlett Johansson butt. That’s like ordering a banana split and getting a pizza with unicorn meat. Or entering the gates of Disneyland, but instead of Mickey Mouse, finding a man wearing a scale plush costume of Jessica Alba’s left breast. Or . . . uh . . . something.

More of Scarlett at MrSkin.com.

Keira Knightley nude? Oh yes.

And hey, Rachel McAdams nude is nothing to sneeze at.