Want to own Scarlett Johansson's boobie? Want to keep it and run your tongue over it and smell it and maybe eat it so her flesh becomes your flesh and the two merge like one? Now you can! Because Scarlett Johansson's boobie is being auctioned off on eBay. Actually, no, make that boogies. As in boogers. Nose turds. She's selling a used Kleenex! Yum! A poster over at ONTD says:
During her 12/17/08 appearance on The Tonight Show with Jay Leno, Scarlett Johansson blamed her cold on The Spirit co-star Samuel L. Jackson, saying she caught it from him. She believed that for this reason her cold had some "value." During her appearance on The Tonight Show, she blew her nose into a tissue provided by Jay Leno. All proceeds of this sale will benefit USA Harvest, the charity of Scarlett Johansson's choice.
It's so weird that Scarlett Johansson has been the cause of so many vile, crusty tissues across this great land, and now she's giving back a vile, crusty tissue of her own. Now that's the spirit of giving. Feliz snotvidad!
