Scarlett Johansson Seeks Amorous Revenge Against Jessica Biel

We've figured you out, Scarlett Johansson and Jessica Biel. We've been confused by your supposed romantic rivalries and Parisian shopping excursions, but no more. We're onto you. And we're not playing this game anymore. We're not going to write story after story about your ridiculously overlapping taste in men while you huddle in front of a laptop in Scarj's multi-million-dollar penthouse apartment and laugh at us. "This sure is fun, Jess. Have another leftover Easter Peep and find another blog that hasn't caught on yet." "Who should we date next, Scar? Matthew McConaughey? Adrian Grenier?" "Let's date them both!" "Hahahaha!" We are not your toy, Jesslett!

Gatecrasher brings us the tale of Phase Two: Part Two in Jess and Scarj's Let's Fuck with the Bloggers campaign (Phase Two: Part One having taken place last month):

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds (celebrity ticker: ScaRy) had a busy Easter weekend in New York City, seemingly going public with their new relationship.

A witness tells us the two hit the Azza lounge on E. 55th St. Friday night.

"They came in with four girls, who seemed to be friends of Scarlett's, around 9 p.m.," says the source. "Later they moved to a private lounge, where they seemed very lovey-dovey."

A club rep declined to comment, but a separate source told us the couple also dined together Saturday night at the Odeon.

Gossip Web site perezhilton.com first posted sightings of them over the weekend at Rao's and sharing an Easter Sunday meal at the Carlyle Hotel.

Johansson's rep E-mailed us: "I don't [comment] on my clients' personal lives."

Now we have two competing fantasies in our head, the first being Jess and Scarj really, physically fighting over the same man, hopefully in a vat of mud or baby oil or lemon curd, the other being the two pulling a prank and having late-night meetings to discuss strategy at each other's apartments while wearing skimpy, lacy lingerie and feeding each other spoonfuls of chocolate sorbet.

Find more ScarJo at MrSkin.com.

Or maybe you prefer Jessica.