That's Not My 18-Year-Old Girlfriend, Officer

That 18-year-old girl in the car with Ryan Phillippe? Oh, she's not his girlfriend. No, she's dating his friend. Also, that weed, it's not his. He, uh, found it on a park bench and didn't want any kids to find it, so he was taking it to the police station. Really. He swears.

Yesterday X17 published some photos of Ryan Phillippe and 18-year-old former O.C. star Nikki Reed sharing a car ride. Which, really, is just a teensy step away from anal fucking on a live webcam show. There is no denying that car rides equal sharing baby fluids. It's a fact. Look it up. But Usmagazine.com doesn't care about facts. They say:

Ryan Phillippe was caught by photogs giving 18-year-old actress, Nikki Reed, a lift while leaving L.A. hot spot Winston’s on Monday night.

And since riding 'gun is the equivalent of dating in the blogosphere, web sites are now claiming that Phillippe, 32, has dipped his toe into the kiddie pool (he split from wife Reese Witherspoon, 30, last October).

However, sources tell Usmagazine.com that Reed is not involved with the actor, but is actually dating one of Phillippe’s friends.

Of course she's dating his friend. He's clearly riding in the backseat of the car. You just can't see him because he's a supersmart scientist and he invented a potion that makes you invisible. He didn't want Ryan or Nikki to take the potion, for fear of unknown side effects. But if you call out his name he'll surely answer you, even though you can't see him. Try it. His name's Bryan Billibbe. He's a really nice guy.

Nikki Reed is legal and sexy at MrSkin.com.

And find Ryan at MaleStars.com.