Joyless harridan Reese Witherspoon and her Bubble Boy beau Jake Gyllenhaal are getting a headstart on the Zack and Miri Make a Porno hype by doing their own version: Reese and Jake Go to the Dildo Store. These two paragons of chastity allegedly visited a sex shop while recently in London. Star mag lets us in on it:
Just 24 hours after Reese Witherspoon arrived in London to visit Jake Gyllenhaal, she coaxed him into a sex toys and underwear emporium for a private strip show.
While shopping in a Myla boutique on the West End, Reese beckoned her beau into the changing rooms, where she surprised him with a private strip show. Jake watched ó with a smile plastered across his face ó as Reese slipped out of her clothes and wiggled into various bra and panty sets, including an itsy-bitsy pair of purple panties and a matching push-up bra.
Reese's private show seemed to have the desired effect ó Jake brought some items up to the cash register, then Reese paid with her credit card.
"Clearly, that purple set did it for him," clerk Vanessa Brown tells Star. "Reese has a really fit body. She looks fantastic. She's petite… but I'm not telling her bra size!"
On the way out of the store, the lovebirds stopped, giggling at a display of sex toys. Reese pointed to a black spoon-shaped gadget designed for "all over body massage as well as more intimate use" and dissolved in fits of laughter.
Christ, these two are even boring in the porn store! Purple pushup bra and giggling at a massager. Ooooh, you naughty! Then again, the bra and panties were probably for Jake. And they were giggling at the massage toy because it was so woefully small compared to Reese's weighty, clublike shenis.
Speaking of Reese, you can see her naked at MrSkin.com.
5 Comments
Um, if it was in a private change room, where'd the description of what went on inside come from?
I'll bet she's a LOT of fun ! I have nothing but admiration for both of them …. and it appears they make a perfect couple.
Poor Jake!
His beard is the dullest b*tch in Hollywood.
Reese Witherspoon is as fun as watching paint dry.
Christ, this is the most stupid and lame "commentary" on the internet.