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January 23, 2008 at 10:50AM

filed under Reese Witherspoon | trackback link

No Poon from Witherspoon. Ever Again.

Reese Witherspoon: award-winning actress, joyless gorgon, refuser of onscreen nudity. She recently sniped to UK Glamour:

"If [actresses] take their clothes off, they objectify themselves. I am flabbergasted by how many legitimate actresses do it . . . I am a role model for my children."

Well, la-di-da, your highness. I guess we should expect as much from someone with the last name "Witherspoon", which conjures up appetizing images of retreating boners and of aged, diseased poons. She may as well call herself Reese Flaccidlance. Or Reese Wizenedwomb. Yes, Reese Wizenedwomb. That's a pretty name.

The funniest part is that Reese has gotten naked in a movie before. See what, when, and where, at MrSkin.com.

Related Topics: Reese Witherspoon, celebrity nudity, movies

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Reese was nude (topless) in the movie Twilight with Liev Schrieber

Posted by: Joel | January 23, 2008 02:39 PM

God, this woman takes herself way too seriously.

She was also complaining about Jessica Simpson acting goofy.

So basically women can't have their beauty and sexuality celebrated in art, and they can't be funny.

Oh, the joys of modern Hollywood.

Reese, please, just retire. You're really not that important, you miserable feminist hag.

Posted by: Poon Raider | January 23, 2008 07:02 PM

That's right she was nude, I guess she's too good for it now. Hypocrites are worse than prudes that are never-nudes.

Her nude body wasn't that special anyway, no need to see it again is there it'll only be saggier now.

Posted by: GOB4 | January 24, 2008 04:36 PM

If Reese wants "to be a role model for her children" perhaps she should quit going off on "weekend retreats" with her boyfriend where the two "hardly ever came out of their room" and everything else the paparazzi likes to write about.

Posted by: The Mayor | January 24, 2008 07:30 PM

well...i came here to mention that she was nude in twilight at a very young age for a considerable amount of screen time but looks like i was beaten to it.

let's not judge little reese so harshly just yet. maybe she was misquoted, incompletely quoted, or quoted out of context.

i can't imagine she'd make a comment like that publicly.

Posted by: jay | January 28, 2008 04:16 AM

Aaaah the rantings of geeks who have never seen a naked lady in the flesh! One day you WILL have a girlfriend....just lose 120 lbs, get a decent haircut and some contacts, the only people THIS obsessed with boobs and bums are virgins and guys who just aren't getting ANY!!! Lads....the Holy Grail is not a nipple slip, or a sneaky bit of thatch on a snatch, true love; passion; desire; relating to a woman on all levels are where it's at. Move out of your parents basement, donate your mac to a 3rd World charity; go inter-react with some warm blooded, real woman, who have not been airbrushed, go 3-D guys!

Posted by: Chick Corunna | February 23, 2008 05:13 AM