Pink Attacked by Frog While Peeing

How many times have you been out on a bike ride and all the sudden had to take a piss? Naturally you hopped off the bike, found a nice bush, and took a shaded squat. And how many times, while you've been squirting it out behind that bush watching for passing cyclists, has an angry frog jumped right in your face, smearing your eyes with slimy gunk? None? Really? Cause that's happened to us at least four times. It's also happened to Pink. Reports our favorite amphibian enthusiast, FemaleFirst:

The 'So What' singer was enjoying a bike trip in Australia with husband Carey Hart, but when the pair stopped for a toilet break the excited amphibian jumped at Pink's face.

A source said: "They were relieving themselves by the road when a frog jumped up and hit Pink bang in the eyes. She freaked."

God, the mental image of Pink squatting down taking a pee when a frog jumps up and beams her in the eyes may be the best we've ever encountered. Maybe it would be better if her biking attire included a tutu and a Viking helmet, but really this is good enough. But what could have been the frog's motive? Did the frog read about Pink's involvement with PETA in Animal (People's less-successful sister publication) and get all up in arms? (Or up in legs or tentacles or whatever frogs call them?) "Why's she so worried about all those cows and chickens? Doesn't she know people eat frogs too? Where's the boycott on my behalf? Here's a protest idea: 'I'd rather hop through fire than eat frogs.' And people would hop through rings of fire while wearing frog costumes. Wait. That doesn't sound right. Let me think on this a bit and I'll have my secretary get back to you. YES, frogs can have secretaries. Gawd, you're so uncultured."