He'll Always Be Like the Wind to Us

First Jeff Healey, now Patrick Swayze? Is there some sort of horrible Road House curse? Should we secret Ben Gazzara away in a plastic bubble? We share the following item with a heavy heart and misty eyes, hoping to God, Allah, Krishna, whomever, that it isn't true:

In a shocking world exclusive, The NATIONAL ENQUIRER has uncovered the devastating news that the beloved Hollywood actor and dancer was diagnosed in late January with pancreatic cancer that has spread to other organs.

For the past month, Patrick, 55, has been traveling to Stanford University’s prestigious cancer center in Palo Alto for radical chemotherapy, but his doctors are no longer optimistic that the treatments will be successful.

Patrick and his wife Lisa Niemi — who both have pilot’s licenses — have been flying their private Beechcraft plane into Palo Alto’s airport, minutes away from the Stanford Cancer Center, where the actor has received outpatient treatment.

He received three doses of chemotherapy and the tumor shrank, but less than his doctors had hoped for — and Patrick was told he should prepare for the end.

“He was told he could have two more treatments, but his cancer was not responding. In short - they held out little hope for a cure,” said an insider.

We're trying to consider the source here--the last time the Enquirer published something that was true, it was about Barry Bostwick and his family updating their country kitchen or something. But on the off chance that it is true . . . well, the only thing giving us any remote glimmer of comfort is the idea of Patrick Swayze and Chris Farley reunited in heaven, performing their classic SNL Chippendales skit together again. Please recover, Mr. Swayze.

UPDATE: unfortunately, Swayze's rep has confirmed the utterly depressing news.