Paris Hilton is so convinced that her Greek playboy paramour is The One that she's ready to give up her "career" to start birthing young. And she's already bought the cutest Louis Vuitton carrying case in which to stash the infant!
The henna-hued heiress plans on retiring (from what? Flashing her puddin' pit on the red carpet?) within the next two to three years to devote her life to hatching an army of insanely wealthy yet humorously vapid bambinos. P-Hiddy has been dating Greek shipping heir Paris (oh, isn't that just precious?) Latsis for five whole months now, so you know it's serious. (Rumor has it, he gave her his JV wrestling jacket, and she totally let him french her behind the bleachers at gym!!!) Paris believes that she has accomplished her life's goals at age 24 and is ready to devote herself to a family: "I want to have kids in the next two years because I know that completes your life. I've had so much fun, and had a great life. I've accomplished everything that I wanted to accomplish and I think that when I have kids that'll make me happier than I already am." Now, let's just backtrack and tick off a list of Paris's accomplishments thus far, shall we?
-Hosted SNL? Check.
-Starred in night-vision porno? Check.
-Gotten arrested? Check.
-Written memoirs? Check.
-Made "art" with Vincent Gallo? Check.
-Gotten hacked, showed world lesbo snuggling with minor celebrity? Check.
Well, that shuts our collective cakeholes.
Paris is nude at MrSkin.com. Hey, that's another accomplishment.
