Paris Eats In-N-Out . . . Also, In-N-Out of Jail

Paris Paris Paris. Paris Paris? Paris Paris, Paris Paris Paris Paris Paris; Paris Paris. Paris! Paris Paris Paris Paris Paris Paris–ParisParisParisParisParisParisParisParisParisParisParis ughgghhghghhghgghh STAB STAB STAB. At this point we could lose our sight and hearing like that dude in the Metallica video and we'd still have to hear about m.f. Paris Hilton every g.d. second. People would come to our bedside and spell out Paris gossip into our hands like we were Helen Keller. Here are today's updates:

ï The L.A. County Sheriff, L.A. County Supervisor, and, uh, Al Sharpton are all ticked off that Paris was released early, bringing up the point that she was given obvious preferential treatment due to her race and wealth and pouty, kissable lips.

ï Oh, that medical condition that was the cause of her release? It was called "Paris was sad." Her psychiatrist said that she was in a "fragile" mental state. Yeah, this is Paris Hilton, she isn't exactly known for brains made of Wheaties and steel.

ï She has to reappear in court this morning in person. The details of her release will be reviewed and she may be ordered to return to prison. After 24 hours whiffing the sweet scent of freedom, that will be a bitter pill to swallow. Haw haw.

ï And, most importantly, Paris's sister Nicky brought her some In-N-Out yesterday. Did she go for the Double Double or the 3×3? We need to know. So hungry.

ï EXCITING UPDATE: Paris is headed back to the clink. What a world! What a world we live in!