We have tried really, really hard to pay absolutely no attention to the man currently servicing Paris Hilton's poon. We do not at all care who he is, if he is famous for something other than his nonchalance in the faces of herpes sores, or if he is worth even half a second of thought. But today is a rather slow gossip day, and Paris has been saying stupid shit, so we've inadvertently learned what her man friend does. He's on The Hills. We're still not sure about his name though. Doug, we think, last name, something German. Please don't make us think about it any longer. Anyway, Paris doesn't like The Hills. Hey! And we thought we'd never have anything in common with her! She told Us Weekly:
The show is, like, so lame and fake. He doesn't even want to be a part of it. They make up relationships when theyíre not there, and he just thinks it's lame. I've never seen the show in my life. I have no idea what it's about. But he just thought it was cheesy.
Um, lame and fake? Did she also call The Hills a sex-tape star and then insult its dog Tinkerbell?
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After all the harping on Paris Hilton's purchases of herpes meds, here's a call to action: Find out who gave it to Paris! The bum is probably still passing it on to other sex partners. Track him down and protect others by revealing the jerk's name.