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Get Your Period, Go to Jail

nicmug.jpgNicole Richie may be facing a short jail sentence following her Monday morning DUI arrest. Yesterday afternoon, US Weekly ran a story insinuating that Nicole claimed the Vicodin was due to menstrual cramps. Which doesn't explain the weed, although if she's doping herself up on narcotics because she was flying the red flag, maybe she was toking the wizz over an eye spasm.

Quoth the US Weekly:

"[Nicole] knows she made a mistake, but overall she's in a better place," says a close friend of Richie. "She has come a long way from her heroin days."

The celebutante is said to be upset over media reports that she's addicted to pills, and is insisting to friends that she only "occasionally" takes Vicodin once a month at the start of her menstruation cycle.

Richie is also unhappy that California cops listed her weight at 85 pounds on the police report because "she's so proud of her weight gain," says the source, who adds that Richie has gained about ten pounds in the last two months and actually weighs around 95 pounds. "She doesn't know where the cops came up with 85 pounds and it's annoying to her."

Nicole might have a little more to worry about than her womanly home companion, however. In accordance with California law, if she is found guilty of driving under the influence (and she admitted as much, so . . .) she could be sentenced to five days in jail because she has a previous DUI arrest on her record. Five days might not seem like a lot to you, but imagine how poor Nicole must feel facing five full days packed with carby, trans fat-filled prison food and no Blackberry access. Oh well, at least she'll be popular with the inmates; they can use her hipbone as a shiv.

Nicole Richie is fleshier and flashier at MrSkin.com.

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